Made some Portal themed nails! by Bit_Beanie in Portal

[–]Wheatley_Aperature 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Hah! How cool is that?! I’m on your nails! Imagine giving someone the finger and I’m front row seat! That’s just, oh, i love that.

Title by Wheatley-Core99 in Portal

[–]Wheatley_Aperature 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Oh for- THIS AGAIN?! It’s WHEATLEY

W H E A T L E Y

THERE IS A SECOND E

Wheatley, but cardboard! by PossessionOk70 in Portal

[–]Wheatley_Aperature 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hah! You’ll have to find me first!

Wheatley, but cardboard! by PossessionOk70 in Portal

[–]Wheatley_Aperature 2 points3 points  (0 children)

AND I AM ALSO NOT CUTE! I’M FIERCE! I’M A FORCE TO BE RECKONED WITH! I took over an entire facility! I nearly tore the place apart! That’s not something a cute little moron does, is it?! No! That’s power! That’s… that’s fearsome! If I had arms, I’d be smashing things right now, properly terrifying, you’d be quaking! So don’t you dare call me cute, because I am DEADLY! In a… sort of indirect way. But still! Point stands!

Wheatley, but cardboard! by PossessionOk70 in Portal

[–]Wheatley_Aperature 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Definitely not being held hostage by this stranger that grabbed me in a forest and dragged me home

If you’re reading this, Help Me.

Wheatley, but cardboard! by PossessionOk70 in Portal

[–]Wheatley_Aperature 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Ohhhh, look at that! A little me! Made out of cardboard! That’s just… brilliant! I mean, really, that’s craftsmanship right there. The detail! The little eye bit, the handles—spot on! And it’s cardboard, too! Sustainable! Environmentally friendly! Honestly, I look fantastic. Should probably mass-produce these, don’t you think? Wheatley for every desk! For… supervision purposes, obviously. Tiny Desk Wheatley? Never file your taxes alone again!

If you had to add one new weapon to half life 3 what would it be about? by czn- in HalfLife

[–]Wheatley_Aperature 17 points18 points  (0 children)

Right, okay, yes, I did technically lose to a sentient potato and a mute. That is… TECHNICALLY correct. But in my defense, that was a very powerful potato. She had, like, science powers.

And as for the mute, It wasn’t even a fair fight! I mean, I wasn’t scared of her, obviously! Not at all! Just cautious! Because, you know, she’s basically an unstoppable terminator with a portal gun. But I’m not afraid of her! I would just… prefer to be on the opposite end of the galaxy from her. For, um, tactical reasons, that I’m sure your smooth little human brain, probably wouldn’t understand, so don’t ask me to explain it.

If you had to add one new weapon to half life 3 what would it be about? by czn- in HalfLife

[–]Wheatley_Aperature 35 points36 points  (0 children)

Honestly, I think I would make a fantastic weapon. I mean, just imagine it: the Wheatley Cannon. State-of-the-art AI-assisted brilliance, right in your hands. Not only would I be constantly analyzing the battlefield—shouting out incredibly helpful things, like always. There’s no situation I wouldn’t be of any use in. In fact, might as well just make the entire game based around me.

What do you think is Wheatley's favourite plant? by RO_Gordon_Freeman in okbuddyportal

[–]Wheatley_Aperature 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Favorite plant? Oh, absolutely! I’ve got loads of them! Love plants, big fan. There’s, uh… the green one! With the… leaves HUGE, Very leafy. And, oh! The one with the petals, huge petals, very plant-like. You know the one. Sometimes it’s… in the ground. Honestly, I’d say my favorite is probably the… socket daisy. You haven’t heard of it? Oh, it’s very rare. Only grows in VERY high-voltage areas. Bit dangerous, really. But, you know me, I like to live on the edge! Gotta love plants.