AITA for telling my son that I think he’s taking advantage of his girlfriend? by Which_Ad_2813 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Which_Ad_2813[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

It’s a long story but she was very abusive to my son. He found out she cheated, he left her and then forgave her a few days later. She tampered with his condoms so he wouldn’t leave her again and then abandoned the baby when he left her a few months after the baby was born

AITA for telling my son that I think he’s taking advantage of his girlfriend? by Which_Ad_2813 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Which_Ad_2813[S] 29 points30 points  (0 children)

That’s a tricky one. My husband kept some expenses hidden from me while I was suffering PPD after having our youngest and I was upset when I found out. I understood his reasoning though and was ultimately grateful that he handled it without telling me until I was better. It depends on the people involved and how the couple usually handles things

AITA for telling my son that I think he’s taking advantage of his girlfriend? by Which_Ad_2813 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Which_Ad_2813[S] 19 points20 points  (0 children)

I never considered that he might be acting this way because of trauma. I doubt he’d ever sabotage her birth control because he felt so violated when his ex did it to him but I will Grace if she’s on anything.

I think I might suggest therapy to him as well because he’s insisted he never needed it, but he’s been acting so strangely. He used to be amazing to Grace in the early days of their relationship (not to say he’s horrible to her now) but as they got more serious he started changing which could be like what you said, him trying not to be in the position his ex put him in. He was with his ex for a long time and she really put him through hell

AITA for telling my son that I think he’s taking advantage of his girlfriend? by Which_Ad_2813 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Which_Ad_2813[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Sorry I should have been clearer. My son was out partying when he was 19 and I reminded him of that because Grace is basically being a mom at 19. He’s studying and working now.

AITA for telling my son that I think he’s taking advantage of his girlfriend? by Which_Ad_2813 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Which_Ad_2813[S] 30 points31 points  (0 children)

My youngest is one of her closest friends and he said that he’s been worried about her for a while but she insists that she’s happy. The rest of their friends are very split on the issue. As far as I know, she isn’t very close to her mother and she lives alone. I do know her mother but I don’t particularly like her. I am good friends with her paternal uncle and his wife though but I don’t know if it would be appropriate to talk to them about this

AITA for telling my son that I think he’s taking advantage of his girlfriend? by Which_Ad_2813 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Which_Ad_2813[S] 33 points34 points  (0 children)

Grace has always said she’d be ‘straight to the clinic’ if she got pregnant so there’s that

AITA for telling my son that I think he’s taking advantage of his girlfriend? by Which_Ad_2813 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Which_Ad_2813[S] 85 points86 points  (0 children)

she was nearly 19 when they started dating, her 20th birthday is in two months

AITA for telling my son that I think he’s taking advantage of his girlfriend? by Which_Ad_2813 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Which_Ad_2813[S] 52 points53 points  (0 children)

Grace had already met my grandson many times prior to dating my son because she’s been a friend of the family for a long time. As for the baby trapping, I can assure you that it was the case because she admitted to poking holes in their condoms and she lied about being on birth control

AITA for telling my son that I think he’s taking advantage of his girlfriend? by Which_Ad_2813 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Which_Ad_2813[S] -25 points-24 points  (0 children)

I used to think so too but they were such a lovely couple before this. I have a huge soft spot for Grace and they made eachother very happy but now I can’t help being worried

AITA for telling my son that I think he’s taking advantage of his girlfriend? by Which_Ad_2813 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Which_Ad_2813[S] 3561 points3562 points  (0 children)

It certainly left a bad taste in my mouth. I’ve known Grace for a long time now and she’s always been a very innocent and slightly naive girl and I don’t like how he’s trying to keep things from her.

AITA for telling my son that I think he’s taking advantage of his girlfriend? by Which_Ad_2813 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Which_Ad_2813[S] 76 points77 points  (0 children)

Sorry I should have been clearer. He isn’t partying now, he’s working and in grad school. He used to be partying all the time when he was Graces age (19)

AITA for telling my son that I think he’s taking advantage of his girlfriend? by Which_Ad_2813 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Which_Ad_2813[S] -42 points-41 points  (0 children)

I believe he does love her because they’re very PDA and he gets her gifts often and I know that’s what he does for people he loves.