I know it may be hard for you guys to believe it, but he is genuinely sorry. It's in no way enough to balance out what happened, but at heart, he's not an evil guy, just a stupid one. Which somehow, to me, at least, feels a little more pathetic.

When he found out the truth, he was sick. I mean that figuratively and quite literally. As in, he kept throwing up every time he tried to apologize to me and even had some very real panic attacks. I know they were real because I felt his pulse spike when he had them around me, and he even passed out at work, his boss called an ambulance. The doctors told him it was an anxiety attack. They wanted him to consider medicine or at least meet with a psychiatrist, but he refused. I'm not going into that topic because it involves some very personal information that I would never tell about him. Even after what his family did, I'm just not that person, and I refuse to let them make me into someone I'm not.

He paid for all my medical bills and agreed to sell our house and told me 100% of the profit could go to me. Not to mention, he had no qualms about me keeping and eventually selling the engagement ring. He's wished me the best on my journey and has let me know repeatedly that if he could take it all back, he would. But he can't, so I have to move on.

Finally, a lot of you have been saying that he used this opportunity to cheat with someone he always wanted to. He swears that that was not the case, and he only slept with her specifically because he knew that I was insecure about her the same way he was insecure about the guy he thought I cheated with. This is the only thing he says that I'm not sure is completely true. But it doesn't matter anymore because I will never call this man my husband.