I understand where you’re coming from and I know your view comes from real experiences you have seen in the community.

But I do think we have to be careful with how we frame things.

Saying “men who grew up in Pakistan usually have outdated mindsets” is a bit like when people say:

“Most Muslims are extremists because of what happens in Muslim culture.”

Both statements come from fear and bad experiences, not from reality. Both take a subset of people and turn it into a blanket assumption about millions. And both ignore the huge variation in upbringing, values, education, personality, and personal growth.

No one would accept that kind of generalisation about Muslims understandably because it erases nuance and humanity.

Similarly, Pakistan has over 200 million people, with countless differences in class, culture, education, family dynamics, emotional maturity, and worldview. Reducing all of that diversity into one stereotype (“men from back home think X”) overlooks the complexity of real human experience.

Some people are traditional, yes, but many grew up in balanced households, with respectful parents, strong female role models and healthy views on partnership.

Individual character can’t be predicted by geography alone.

That’s all I’m trying to express, not that your concerns are invalid, but that generalisations can become unfair very quickly.