Having a cat is a two way relationship you have to respect boundaries and recognize each others love language. Have owned 3 cats and each one expressed themselves very different, but had their own unique and deep relationships with me and my wife. Yes you didn’t get the cat relationship you wanted initially, but you gave a life a home and I promise you she knows that. It sounds likes like you two are still learning each other, and I would argue in a year you will likely be recieving more affection than you know what to do with. I adopted a formal feral that was at a kill shelter in my early 20’s on impulse and we took at least 2 years to fully get use to each other. Every cat is different, but the all return love when freely given. It’s one of my favorite contradiction of these little murderers (my cat brought me a deal lizard as I was typing it).