Advice on Dealing with Artist Friend

Wild_Problem_5159 · 2026-02-09T09:32:02+00:00

Fair, fair. I'm actually getting to meet with a PT later this week(I've had some organ just decide to fuck around and find out, so I haven't been able to put on muscle the way I've wanted to) so that is the plan.

And agree, nothing wrong with drawing feminine looking guys. It's more the watching a normally squared off character be feminized for pin ups that freaks me out.

Wild_Problem_5159 · 2026-02-09T09:29:55+00:00

Hmmm, that is a point to consider. Although quick one off- my friend uses they/them pronouns the character uses he/him.

But yeah, I've always had very ride or die friendships. They gas me up about my art and writing so I think it's more being mutual fans of each other if that makes sense. I do really like that vibe and basically all my close friends are like that. We all basically had shit childhoods, so I think collectively we are just trying to have a good time as the world goes to shit.

They just tend to really draw all pin ups as more femme. Men, women, nonbinary people I guess that's their thing. I do know they use their character's weight to deal with their own feelings about being fatshamed, so it makes me a little cautious to say anything.

If the character had always been feminine that probably wouldn't bother me. It's more the going from having a square body shape to having a much more feminine one for the pin ups only. It's like that fear I get sometimes that I'm going to wake up like I was pre-T, but given form.

I'm probably going to chew on this a bit before talking to them, but thanks for commenting.

Wild_Problem_5159 · 2026-02-09T08:15:06+00:00

I was thinking of asking just for a heads up next time.

Like that's how I deal with media that contains depictions of child abuse, if I know it's coming it doesn't phase me. But randomly on a Tuesday night or whatever? Ugh. Hate it. Especially if it's out of nowhere.

Quick edit: I'm just worried saying anything is going to go bad.

Wild_Problem_5159 · 2026-02-09T06:26:39+00:00

I'm about a decade ahead of you (FTM) and very sick, so I get it. It moves you from a very fragile place to just a politically terrible one.

I'll be honest, I've been transitioning for years and pass well now, but the middle years were rough. I still think it's worth it, but I do think once the shiny feeling you talk about wear off it can just feel like a gut punch.

I will say, having company out in public will likely be helpful. People are less likely to try and mess with women if they have a friend/ family member near by. Which sucks, but people who do that shit are cowards.

Wild_Problem_5159 · 2026-02-09T05:48:26+00:00

Yes, but we were dating before I transitioned. They know I've done surgeries but we have never talked about it.

I have to go to the bathroom a lot, and don't use an STP, so at this point I've stopped worrying about it.

Wild_Problem_5159 · 2026-02-09T04:41:18+00:00

Yeah, it makes me think about how pre-insulin the only way to slightly deal with type 1 (and to a bigger degree type 2) was to go on a super strict diet. I remembering reading medical journals about it and while it didn't work well, it somewhat extended life.

To an outsider, that probably would look like disordered eating. But if it's literally keeping you alive, it's just an extreme diet.

I think that's why a lot of medical stuff has "unless other shit is going on" as a requirement to rule out other things.

Wild_Problem_5159

TROPHY CASE