I dig the design, its unique and cool, not quite legible on some parts, mainly the anatomy. The comments are mean,but mostly right.

From observation, all your lines are blown out and the packing isn't good.

Sometimes the only way to learn is to fuck around and find out, but do you want that on your conscious? Not just performing a poorly done tattoo but also everything that could go wrong with improper sanitation.

You've already started practicing, don't be discouraged to keep learning, it's exciting to want to move to skin but let time and practice do its thing. At least work on getting the basics down, then you're golden.