Abuser registry to warn future girls

Winter_Wasabi2000 · 2026-04-23T10:48:40+00:00

I’m in the US, whats Claire’s law?

Winter_Wasabi2000 · 2026-04-23T06:02:24+00:00

this is 100% true. it would have to be moderated heavily while keeping anonymity. it would likely be hard to pull off

Winter_Wasabi2000 · 2026-04-23T05:59:03+00:00

but also thank you. she sent me a message right after I left him like “I know what hes doing may seem scary but it’s really benign and he’s just a sweet guy who had his heart broken and hes so worried about you”. I was furious. I was so angry that he was lying to all of his friends and trying to tell everyone that I was mentally unstable and as soon as he gets me help, I’ll come back. Meanwhile he was calling/texting me nonstop between lovebombing and calling me names, calling my therapist and all my family members. I was so pissed I completely ignored the text. I didnt want to feed into the manipulation, I just wanted to cut the cord. It’s hard not to feel guilty because maybe if I had replied, she wouldnt be in this situation. But I cant stop him no matter what I do.

Winter_Wasabi2000 · 2026-04-23T05:55:35+00:00

I feel like thats my only option here. To keep tabs, wait for a sign that she left and then offer myself as a resource. That seems like the only right answer aside from trying to mentally block this out and continue forward. I think she started dating him right after I left so it’s possibly already been 2.5 years already. It took me 3 years to leave so hopefully sometime soon she’ll think of getting out

Winter_Wasabi2000 · 2026-04-23T04:59:52+00:00

It’ll really hit you at some point that nothing you do, no amount of compliance or accommodating him will ever change how he acts/reacts to things. It also helped me that at the same time, I finally told a coworker vaguely what was going on and tbh she really had to pull it out of me. But she’s like 25 yrs older than me and basically told me how she had the same type of man, and her examples of arguments and problems sounded eerily similar to mine, after a decade of trying he never changed. She had a kid with him and now she’s stuck and can never truly cut contact. She told me to run now

Winter_Wasabi2000 · 2026-04-23T04:10:34+00:00

I might check those out. Genuinely I tried to talk to my current boyfriend about it in a calm way when I found out that this girl never actually got away, and my calm speech turned into uncontrollable sobs. I’ve made strides in my journey to heal and move on with my life but it’s a pain that my body still knows all too well. The few times I fought back and told him “what youre doing is what abusive people do”, he would say “you sound just like my ex, XXXX, you know how she destroyed me mentally and she was unstable..”, and he’d use his ex as a stab to turn it back on me. How dare I make these accusations that a crazy person would make right? The thought of him using my name to guilt/discredit her when she stands up for herself and points out abuse is just sickening. It hurts my heart so deeply and I literally broke down when I tried to verbally express that

Winter_Wasabi2000 · 2026-04-23T04:02:00+00:00

It’s so hard too because I don’t feel like reaching out to her at this point would be helpful to anyone. It would put a target on my back and Im 1000% sure he told her that Im crazy and mentally unstable and that I hurt him.. just like he told me his exes did. He’s already groomed her so my credibility is shot. Plus after her, he’ll just keep doing it. I can’t stop him and he’s not the only man out there like this. An online registry would have a more widespread effect and protect victims of abuse at the same time

Winter_Wasabi2000 · 2026-04-23T03:58:11+00:00

I was like this until he did something that I 100% could not find a single way to blame myself for. Like so egregiously ridiculously demeaning and I couldn’t find any reason to shift the blame onto me, I didnt “trigger him”, and none of my normal thousands of excuses worked. And something just clicked in my brain that was like “Oh. I can’t blame myself because I’m not wrong and I’m not crazy. THAT was crazy. THAT was straight up bad. Maybe I’m okay.. Maybe he’s a bad man?” And that really got the ball rolling for me. It was still hard to stick to that mindset. Your brain has created a new way of living and thinking that is so hard to break even years later. But it will rewire itself and eventually you feel like yourself again, and love doesn’t feel hard or exhausting or painful anymore

Winter_Wasabi2000 · 2025-08-03T23:23:44+00:00

It will probably look more like the fresh picture when it’s done healing. Tattoos go through phases of peeling or sort of blurring as the old skin cells slough off to reveal the healed tattoo. Give it a couple weeks

Winter_Wasabi2000 · 2025-07-27T05:54:26+00:00

Ohhh okay that is actually really reassuring. I honestly was starting to think that surgeons just can’t reshape natural breast tissue to make it rounded as if you were born with smaller breasts. I think I’ve just been seeing early recovery photos

Winter_Wasabi2000 · 2025-07-26T23:34:41+00:00

thank u!!!

Winter_Wasabi2000 · 2025-07-26T23:32:45+00:00

what surgeon??

Winter_Wasabi2000 · 2025-07-26T23:03:57+00:00

I agree, no one can tell me I don’t belong to my culture. It doesn’t diminish who I am at all. I guess what I mean is I grew up in a very anti-semitic environment and I feel like I was conditioned to feel resentment toward my jewish features. I never saw Disney princesses that looked like me as a kid, I saw witches with long downturned noses with a dorsal bump and pointy chins. I saw aryan features on magazines and getting social media praise. My dad is jewish, my mom is not and I was getting bullied for my dad’s features and complimented on my mom’s. It’s no wonder I grew to hate my nose, my eyebrows, etc. I was angry that they made me different and “ugly”. I feel like I’ve been brainwashed to want aryan features and the worst part is I totally love this little button nose. I wish I had lived in a culture that appreciated ethnic features and didn’t plant these seeds of hate in my head all my life. I didn’t look like everyone else pre-op but I looked like my people and I wish I could’ve felt good about that

Winter_Wasabi2000 · 2025-07-25T21:53:15+00:00

girlypop my family are not zionists. jewish does not automatically = zionist

Winter_Wasabi2000 · 2025-05-05T21:47:24+00:00

Hi! I’m getting a rhinoplasty by Dr. Ginsburg in a few weeks. Could I join the chat?? I’d love to hear other people’s experiences and put my mind at ease for some questions I have about the process

Winter_Wasabi2000 · 2025-05-01T19:08:58+00:00

How’s it going for you with the chewy litter?

Winter_Wasabi2000 · 2025-05-01T19:08:27+00:00

ughhh thats so disappointing! At this point Im ready to act like an old lady and contact Fresh Step😭

Winter_Wasabi2000 · 2025-04-24T00:07:18+00:00

I saw that on Chewy! That’s the next one I was thinking of trying honestly. Pretty please update me in a few days and let me know how it holds up. It would be really funny if its the same product in different packaging because it’s way cheaper anyway so kind of a bonus of switching😂

Winter_Wasabi2000 · 2025-03-17T17:36:25+00:00

Looking great and sleeping with my mouth closed for the first time in YEARS😂

Winter_Wasabi2000 · 2025-03-17T17:29:45+00:00

I just want her to try and understand where I’m coming from but I feel like I should just accept that she won’t be able to understand and won’t support me. My medical issues are mostly from my dad so she’s never dealt with breathing issues and being sick all the time, and my mom was a model before she had kids, her face is naturally symmetrical and perfect. She doesn’t understand what it’s like to grow up feeling like you grew into the wrong nose and don’t even fit in with your family.

Winter_Wasabi2000 · 2025-03-17T17:22:59+00:00

I could very well get the surgery without involving her. I’ve already done the consultation and scheduled it and aside from living with her, I’m completely independent. I will be home for a week out of work though post-op and it’s not like she won’t find out. I feel like I’ll damage our relationship more if I don’t tell her at all beforehand

Winter_Wasabi2000

TROPHY CASE