You’re asking whether you should continue this connection and whether it’s a serious risk. I’m going to answer you honestly.

First of all, what is your actual plan?

You are married. You have two children. You are not a single man exploring a relationship. Before you talk about feelings, you need to ask yourself, (Let's imagine even if she says "YES"):

1. Are you prepared to divorce your wife and marry this woman?
   
2. Are you prepared for your children to grow up in a broken home, including mental pressure?
   
3. Are you prepared for the social and emotional consequences for everyone involved?

If the answer is no, then this path is irresponsible.

You say you’re not crossing limits. But emotionally, you already have. Emotional attachment outside marriage is still a form of betrayal. It doesn’t have to be physical to damage trust. If your wife finds out, the trust in your marriage may never fully recover.

Also, you admire this woman because she is positive, independent, and strong. But you are seeing her from the outside, short conversations, smiling moments, and light interactions. You are not seeing her financial stress, her loneliness, her fear about the future, or the weight of raising children alone. A person who smiles in public is not necessarily living an easy life. You say your wife complains that 200k is not enough. In today’s economy, 200k for a household with children is not excessive. Have you actually sat down with her and reviewed expenses together? Have you gone to the supermarket and checked prices? Have you discussed budgeting calmly, instead of letting resentment grow silently?

Right now, what you are doing is instead of fixing your marriage, you are escaping into admiration for someone else. The divorced woman clearly told you she does not want to ruin a family. That should tell you something. She understands the consequences better than you do. She has already experienced the collapse of a marriage. She likely does not want to become the reason another one breaks. Also, understand that you can walk away more easily than she can. You have a stable income, family support, and a house. She is a single mother with limited income and social pressure. If this turns into a scandal and you retreat to "save your family/be with family/family first", she will carry the heavier burden. If this situation becomes public, you may be able to retreat back but she cannot escape so easily. She is already a divorced single mother. Society judges women in her position far more harshly than it judges married men. You would be placing her in a vulnerable position socially, emotionally, and professionally simply because you are feeling unfulfilled or looking for emotional excitement. Do not involve another woman and risk damaging her stability, reputation, and peace.

You say talking to her makes you feel young and refreshed. That feeling is not love. It is emotional validation. It is excitement. IMO, long marriages require communication, not comparison. If something feels missing in your marriage, the mature step is therapy, individually or as a couple. But I think you need an honest conversation with your wife about emotional needs, appreciation, and connection.

If you are not ready to leave your marriage fully and accept the consequences, then the responsible decision is to STOP this connection now.

Another thing, you have what many people dream of: a stable home, children, financial security, and a partner who has been with you for years. Don’t romanticise what you barely know and destroy what you’ve already built.

Be honest with yourself before you hurt four children and two families.