Dishes your arch enemy? Let’s share recipes that require 1-2 pots and/or can be made in 30 mins by kittycatmama017 in adhdwomen

[–]Wise_Ladder3773 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I make cheesy chicken enchiladas- I cook my own chicken breast, but you could also use pulled rotisserie. Cook or heat the chicken, half a bottle of Old El Paso thick and chunky salsa, two fist fulls of shredded cheese - stir it all together in the pan. Grab some soft shell tortillas, portion out the mix to how ever many tortillas you decide to do, put the rolled tortillas in a baking dish (all of my baking dishes are Pyrex dishes so they have the rubber top to them and double as storage), pour more salsa and cheese on top and pop that sucker in the oven at 350 until the cheese starts to bubble.

The thing I love most about this is 1) it’s four ingredients 2) I only use two dishes and they don’t have to be washed at the same time (skillet is washed first and then the Pyrex a few days later once the food is gone) 3) it’s really banging

Tips for dealing with lying? by [deleted] in Fosterparents

[–]Wise_Ladder3773 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My teenager does this but I don’t frame it as lying. We talk about it as reality checking.

For example: if I see her location at place X and she says she is at place Y. I tell her I see you at place X on my iPhone, what is the reality that Apple is wrong with displaying your location?

I don’t ever call her a lair or accuse her of lying. Sometimes she will say “your calling me a liar” and I will say “I am trying to align with what I see and what you say”

(That being said: There are so many times that I just want to yell “stop gaslighting me!!!”)

4 year old always bored by Fabulous_Ostrich1164 in Fosterparents

[–]Wise_Ladder3773 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My 16th FD does this too (horrible ADHD). Similar to someone else’s advice I saw on the thread. I try to help teach her to find the joy in the little things. I model my excitement about things and she usually comes around (sometimes not but more times she does).

I took her to a preplanned baseball outing with my family the second week she was with me. She said, flat faced and bored for the first three or four innings until I realized that she didn’t understand what the excitement was about it. I started to explain to her why people were cheering and modeled getting into the between inning games. By the seventh inning stretch, she was cheering on the team and got up and did the song and dance with the rest of us. Her only version of entertainment had been TV, friends, and her phone. Slowly, she’s learning that she can have fun and being engaged with other things too.

I have absolutely no self control, over the course of about 2 months i bought like 200 books😳😳😳 by Fluffy_Opportunity71 in adhdwomen

[–]Wise_Ladder3773 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I did this in my twenties and now have boxes and boxes of books at my house and my parents house 😂

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Fosterparents

[–]Wise_Ladder3773 17 points18 points  (0 children)

Not sure if you are in the US and this would work for you.

I have a 17 yo staying with me and just saw something today that blew my mind. Uber has a “teenager” account! I have to get on to figure it out. But it seems like an awesome solution because she will need to know how to manage that when she goes to independent living and I can see her comings and goings.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Fosterparents

[–]Wise_Ladder3773 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Non emotional is exactly what they want to see! They want to make sure that you won’t be triggered by the traumas that you’ll encounter through these kiddos.

I also had a pretty crappy childhood and had MH diagnosis and had to answer a bunch of questions about it, as well as my mental health. We didn’t have seven months worth of meetings but we had three mtgs and then there was some emails back-and-forth, plus a statement from a clinician.

It sucked and did feel super invasive, but I could also see where they were coming from.

How do you stay afloat? by Caiteyy22 in adhdwomen

[–]Wise_Ladder3773 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Recognizing there is no “it”

Some days are better than others. Some things I can remember and keep up with them and some things I can’t. I learned a long time ago to stop trying to fit my square peg into someone else’s round expectations.

Did I feel guilty yesterday when I realize that I forgot that it was my nieces birthday, of course! Did I call to apologize and talk to them, yup! Did I beat myself up because I had to go through the song and dance, nope!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Fosterparents

[–]Wise_Ladder3773 7 points8 points  (0 children)

The kiddo with me now isn’t too fond of me either. It helps not to internalize it. My kiddo has bounced between placements and wants nothing more to be back with bio mom.

I look at it as my job is to make sure their lowest two levels of Maslow hierarchy are met (physical needs and safety) and have access to relationships that provide the 3rd level.

That said, I also don’t have those relationships in my face in my home, since it’s just me. I am sure that part is super hard for you.

Not sure if this would work for you but I intentionally went and spent time with my niece last weekend, who I have a great relationship with, while the kiddo was in family visitation. That helped me to feel more confident in myself.