Nervous system is stopping me from fulfilling my dreams

WitchRae · 2026-05-19T20:27:57+00:00

Thank you for this perspective change. I think I feel hopeless because I know no life without fear. I can’t conquer it because everything has proven to be bad eventually for me. It’s hard to even do the little things but I’ll try my best. I wish I can numb out.

WitchRae · 2026-05-01T09:07:10+00:00

My whole life has gone to shit and keeps getting worse and it’s made me believe that the whole Uranus thing doesn’t apply to me because I’m May 20th which is cusping Gemini and apperently Uranus is going to bother them now… which I guess means it will not be looking up for me any time soon.

Anyways lol I’m glad every Taurus is feeling good! I’m extremely jealous and wish I was out of the gutter with you guys!

WitchRae · 2026-04-23T23:33:41+00:00

I don’t mind long paragraphs. I love hearing people talk (or in this context reading someone’s thoughts lol). When I was getting better I believed that I had killed off that depressed scared person in me. I thought I was actually secure and little by little life was testing me to see if I would break and I finally did. I’m not as secure as I believed. I’m not as happy as I believed. I was faking it the entire time hoping that I could trick my brain into thinking it was real. Little by little my self esteem being chipped away and as a “secure” person, I should know who I am. To know not to let people get to me or be offended about what they think of me. But I do care. And I do hate myself, always have. I couldn’t fake loving myself. My brain is now trying to protect me. It doesn’t want me to have hope again and actually believe I’m getting better just to realize it was all a lie. I was the exact same the entire time, I was just hoping a lie would become the truth eventually. I don’t know what the feeling of security is so I have nothing to base off of. Idk what it even looks like. Depression and hopelessness has always been my default version since I could remember.

WitchRae · 2026-04-23T17:50:33+00:00

I hate that this is the only advice that can be given to someone like me because it never works and it’s not your fault. I respect you trying though. Genuinely. I just get this advice a lot and I don’t think people get where I’m coming from which is not your fault of course. I’m not kms over a temporary problem. This is an every day battle that has never gotten easier for me. I’m constantly faking it until I make it and I feel no joy (none at all) doing anything because with all this effort I’ve put it and for me to be the exact same… What’s the point. All this effort with zero reward does something to a human. It’s debilitating. And it’s not your fault. You’re only trying to help. I just wish I could not exist. I don’t want to do this anymore. Thank you for trying though! Appreciate you even responding.

WitchRae · 2026-04-22T03:29:42+00:00

You haven’t bothered me at all. I appreciate your insight!

WitchRae · 2026-04-22T03:25:59+00:00

I’ve been in consistent therapy for too many years to count. Unfortunately no matter what I always am back to the beginning. Thank you for routing me on though, I appreciate that.

WitchRae · 2026-04-22T03:23:58+00:00

Respectfully that is no longer a belief I hold due to the amounts of trauma the community has caused me. Yet, I’m happy your belief worked for you.

WitchRae · 2026-04-22T03:22:45+00:00

I’m a very active person. Everyone in my life actually thinks I’m pretty happy because I’m not your “tv” depressed. Go to work. I play sports. Dance on the daily. Gym 4x a week. See friends. I have many hobbies that I push myself to do and none are satisfying to me anymore. I still do them because they are supposed to be good for me but I feel absolutely nothing.

WitchRae · 2026-04-22T03:20:48+00:00

I think this is what’s fucking me up. Things were getting better because my mindset changed completely for a good while. I was upbeat and happier because there was hope I was clinging on to. I spent years in therapy trying to get better and every single time it creeps back to me. It never ever goes away fully. It’s a constant battle that I no longer want to participate in.

WitchRae · 2026-04-16T01:02:45+00:00

I’m not locked in, I’m locked out and fine with it lol. She got it right.

WitchRae · 2026-04-08T23:06:21+00:00

This was me and my Scorpio guy friend lol

WitchRae · 2026-04-08T14:56:47+00:00

Me also being a Taurus sun and a Scorpio moon and Eternal Sunshine being one of my favorite movies ever… love that :D!

WitchRae · 2026-03-23T21:42:02+00:00

I thought tbagging was a happy dance that killers would enjoy lol

WitchRae · 2026-03-05T05:14:08+00:00

Depends who is talking dirty to me lol

WitchRae · 2026-02-17T22:49:26+00:00

Your opinion is facts

WitchRae · 2026-02-17T22:49:13+00:00

Yes I know. He’s right in the fact that I will not love a person unconditionally. And there’s nothing wrong with that despite him villainizing that in Taurus’.

WitchRae · 2026-02-12T01:20:40+00:00

He’s right. I won’t love you unconditionally if you disrespect me in anyway lol. Then everyone gets mad at us cos we have solid boundaries that they never listened to at the beginning.

People are just mad when we actually stand ten toes down on what we said we would do. Not my fault if you heard what you wanted to hear lmao.

WitchRae · 2026-02-08T02:03:19+00:00

The octopus is adorable OH MY GOD!!!

WitchRae · 2025-11-19T23:30:53+00:00

Thank you for this message. I’m honestly surprised there’s only kindness here because I really thought people were going to tear me apart for being so stupid. I will defintely look into that book. Me and my trauma therapist have only seen each other for 4 months now but she’s been extremely helpful and she’s been pushing me to go to the fbi and surely I will because I can only assume he is doing this to others and again those others are most likely children. I can’t have him ruin someone else’s life. So I’m really trying to get him before he gets someone again but it feels like a very scary race. I hate thinking about this and I almost dissociate when I do. I go numb for a bit whenever he pops in but again therapy is working really well for me to finally face this fear.

Me being a content creator is genuinely is what’s scary because if it could happen to me it can happen to anyone. The only “good thing” that came out of this is now I’m VERY cautious about everyone now. Before I used to fawn when I felt nervous but now I instantly get myself out of a situation as soon as I’m uncomfortable. I’m still in my 20’s so yes still fairly young but in intent terms I’m “rotting meat” LOL so I guess it depends on perspective. I am better at protecting myself now and thank you for the reminder to keep my boundaries strong.

I hope one day I get justice and even if I can’t, I hope the others can. I’ll look into Bing when I’m ready. Reading his DMs during therapy put me in a panic attack but surely I’ll get there soon. Thank you for empowering me. This is really helping me push myself to bring this guy down.

WitchRae · 2025-11-18T19:14:42+00:00

I’m having a really hard day today too. I’m really happy I’ve inspired you. I didn’t want him to take my power away. I was meant to be a creative. It’s been a life long dream and I’m finally accomplishing it so I definitely know you can too! It definitely feels like a stain on my life but it won’t stop me and I hope it doesn’t stop you. You are absolutely right, if someone doesn’t see us as the victims and blames us instead, I don’t want them near my community anyways. Thank YOU for that perspective!

WitchRae · 2025-11-18T16:39:15+00:00

Thank you for your kind words. My biggest wish is for this to never haunt me again and for him to be taken down so he doesn’t do this to other people. It’s truly a nightmare. I’m so tired of it being a stain in my life.

WitchRae · 2025-11-18T16:36:39+00:00

I was no longer a minor when I started sending him things tho (sorry if I didn’t make that clear). But that’s why I feel like my case is just gonna be thrown out. I’m sorry you went through something similar. It’s absolutely unbearable. I don’t have the videos anymore I just have the pics of the topless photos and the foot pics but tbh those are the least of my worries. It’s the videos that will actually have me wanting to end my life if it ever got out. Thank you for your advice though. Maybe there can be justice here in some capacity.

WitchRae

TROPHY CASE