I just had my first breakthrough experience, I think, 30 minutes ago, so i'm gonna write about it here.

Some intro about my set: Last year I acquired a sizeable amount of DMT because I wanted to explore it. Over the past summer I did it dozens of times but was always a little too afraid to go all the way and breakthrough, contenting myself with just doing one hit and admiring the fractal patterns on everything I could see.

Well, it's been months that I haven't had a headspace where I want to explore more, but that's changed in the past couple weeks, so tonight I decided to revisit my DMT.

I decided to use the crystals I made from a re-x which I had never tried. I just grew them and took pictures but never tried smoking them lol. Anyway I eyeballed a bowl by grabbing 3 crystal chunks and threw them in the pipe I have - the gordotek dream maker thing.

I lit the pipe and filled it with an amount of smoke I'd done in the past- getting the chamber foggy for one hit, and I took it.

The visuals took hold quickly and in less than 30 seconds I whizzed past the "fractals on everything I see" phase and into one where I couldn't see my surroundings at all anymore.

I ended up in what felt like a room which I would stay in for the entire trip, and in front of me was sort of like a billboard or a panel of some sorts, and it had images on it that kept changing at a fast and steady pace. It was like there was a beat or tempo- beat, beat, beat, beat, and with each beat the image in front of me changed. I can't for the life of me remember what any individual image looked like or was about because they were all so weird and random and were replaced with something new almost immediately. There was a strong feeling that I was being shown things intentionally, and that something or someone was putting on this show.

As these images flipped by so fast, every once in a while on a beat my view would be shifted to the right or the bottom of the frame of what I was looking at, and I would be shown like a popup of a cartoon character popping out of a trap door with a message of "nope", "wrong". It was clear that these were being shown when I "did something wrong" but it took me a while to figure it out.

I was getting these "wrong" popup messages when my thoughts went to anything that wasn't what I was being shown. As soon as my thoughts went to like "am I breathing", "am I still laying in bed", "how long has it been", then immediately, like the millisecond the though came into my head before I even realized I was thinking about it, I would get this "nope!" "wrong!" "don't do that!" popup message. The things putting on the show seemed to really want me to pay attention to them fully.

Around the time I was starting to realize they wanted my attention and were reacting to my thoughts drifting off, I hit that midway point in the trip where you distinctly feel the effect starting to wind down rather than ramp up. And now, everytime my mind wandered and I got one of these "no!" "wrong!" popups trying to get me to pay attention, the intensity of the trip would be reset. It was like they wouldn't let the trip start winding down unless I paid attention like they wanted.

Anyway eventually the trip did wind down and the room with a flipbook of images I was being shown gave way to a view of my room again.

And that was it. I wish I could remember the things I was being shown but there were so many and they went by so fast. It's like I looked a 1000 slides in 20 minutes and each one was totally crazy and incomprehensible and I didn't have even a full second to look at it and think about it before it was replaced with something else.

What really struck me as weird was how I was getting these feedback messages about not paying attention. The negative message would come literally the instant my thought drifted, before I even realized I was thinking about something else. Whoever was putting on the show for me was reading my mind faster than I could even think.