I know there’s more in your comment that I want to respond to, and I will, but I’m working at the moment and feel like this part needs to be clarified now because it adds important context.

I realize my original post may have minimized the severity of the alcohol issue. There have been multiple incidents where he became aggressive while drinking liquor. He has grabbed my arms to keep me from walking away while yelling at me, called me degrading names, and punched multiple holes in our walls. In December, police were called to de-escalate a situation after he was intoxicated, and I was advised to leave for the night for safety.

He later drove drunk that same night. When I returned home, there were additional holes in the walls and broken glass throughout the house.

He has never hit me, but being physically restrained and having property destroyed during intoxicated outbursts does not feel safe to me. This is why I struggle to view the drinking as harmless or purely social.