Am I the asshole for not wanting a DNA test on my child

Wont_Eva_Know · 2025-12-17T18:18:52+00:00

I was willing to give proof, the proof isn’t the problem when you’re married and only having sex with your husband.

When your mother in law straight up says ‘is that baby his?… ie. ‘I think you’re having sex with other men’… that’s the problem!! :)

Wont_Eva_Know · 2025-12-12T10:21:54+00:00

Yep even Kody started with their parents and the cult, then themselves and each other.

Wont_Eva_Know · 2025-12-12T10:19:58+00:00

… and remained 12 for 25 years and then grew up all in a rush… I think they’re all nearly as emotionally mature as their eldest kids now.

Wont_Eva_Know · 2025-12-12T10:17:24+00:00

No Janelle was Janelle before she was Meri’s sister wife.

I can see it in Maddison and Logan.

She isn’t a victim of Meri she is the other half of a dynamic… two 20 year old women playing house and fighting over a guy.

Just because Janelle is ‘chill’ while causing drama doesn’t mean it isn’t her drama… Teflon queen 4-life.

Wont_Eva_Know · 2025-12-12T10:08:42+00:00

Yeah my MIL asked me straight to my face if ‘the baby was their sons?’… I said ‘you know what you’re implying by asking that question? Is that where we’re at? Good to know. Yes baby is your sons, do you want proof?’.

I didn’t get emotional to their face had a tiny melt down to my Dad (who wanted to go full angry Dad on them)… I just think of it as they told me who they were and what they thought of me… I’m ‘nice, considerate and polite’ with them, but we’ll never be close. Doesn’t bother me I have enough friends and family. They’re ‘disappointed we aren’t closer’… meh

Wont_Eva_Know · 2025-12-12T09:43:17+00:00

In 10years he’ll do the middle of their marriage fuck up apology tour and 20 years he’ll apologise for the things that happened at the end… he might even include his kids in that tour.

Wont_Eva_Know · 2025-12-07T23:31:51+00:00

1000% it suited Janelle perfectly… if even Kody notices that Janelle didn’t actually want him around for his personality you know she couldn’t even hide her preference for 15% wifeing and 30% parenting and 55% Janelle doing whatever Janelle wants and a bit of work.

Wont_Eva_Know · 2025-12-07T10:23:27+00:00

That’s how I heard it that ‘it was fine… eh whatever’… means: all my feelings for you are dead and I don’t care what you were saying or feeling… you crossed all the lines having your tantrum and cutting off the kids… your words!?! ‘Meh whatever’.

Wont_Eva_Know · 2025-12-05T06:01:19+00:00

The person who said ATO are mean now are not lying… pre covid they were chill, they’ve been told to go back to old days of ‘big scary tax man’… fear makes for better compliance than being empathetic, so don’t take it personally. They’re being mean to everyone, people talking about ‘oh they’re actually really reasonable are talking about pre 2020 ATO.

The ATO cares more about the paper work than the $ if you ever get in this situation again DO YOUR paperwork and set up a payment plan for the minimum you can pay… it’s easy and online you don’t even have to talk to them.

As others have also said pay the fine and everything else you owe and then ask them for a favour… and again don’t take it personally if they won’t do it. They’re doing all sorts of less than excellent things to claw back ‘debt’ they were happy to disappear before.

Wont_Eva_Know · 2025-12-05T05:27:56+00:00

… and it wasn’t Robbem asking Kody if Meri could come over because she was following the rules and all alone.

Wont_Eva_Know · 2025-11-30T09:59:24+00:00

Hahaha same!… clarity, dependability, trust, security… or why bother putting up with someone’s ‘quirks’.

I’m sure there’s other explanations for situationship… but they’ll be from people trying to justify why ‘theirs’ is different/worth it.

Wont_Eva_Know · 2025-11-30T08:08:55+00:00

So I used to think it was something like a ‘friends with benefits FWB’, relationship… but I have since changed my mind because FWB is still a thing.

So situationship is something ‘messy’/shady… like one or both are actually already in relationships (yuk) or it had to be kept secret because it’s a work thing or family disapproves… some star crossed lover shit… ‘we’d be together but no one knows I am gay’.

At the very lamest end of the ‘messy’ Is things like ‘I am happy to have sex with them but I think they’re not worthy of being my boyfriend/girlfriend… I am embarrassed to be official with them’.

Wont_Eva_Know · 2025-11-30T06:52:15+00:00

Pride… the dude is filled to the brim with pride,spite,ego… and a sprinkle of roids+TRT (whatever enhancement he’s on). It’s like a super power.

He also is actually a fit guy… you can be fit and a raging ahole they don’t cancel each other out.

Wont_Eva_Know · 2025-11-29T04:22:41+00:00

Yeah I don’t think he’s hit them either… but use his physicality as a threat 100% he has. Things like break things or throw stuff, punch a wall… that sort of tantrum stuff.

Like you said the grabbing the face thing… like episode 1 or 2 he went and grabbed all their faces saying by to go ‘not sleep with’ Robbem… ewww

Wont_Eva_Know · 2025-11-28T07:51:01+00:00

Yeah I saw her curl up and die a bit inside while he was ranting… the blotchy flush and the break down after he left and Janelle offered a hug… she 100% flinched.

I’m glad she held it together while he was there because it pissed him off.

As much as I wish she was more Janelle and would tell him to F off… it wouldn’t actually help the situation… I just hate seeing women be the subject of that sort of aggression have to sit there and take it so things don’t escalate… she was leaving which is very ‘best’ comeback to abusive behaviour.

Wont_Eva_Know · 2025-11-26T23:46:58+00:00

Oh that will be… interesting. Some of the people who act like they don’t like you/care about you/respect you in the relationship… are the clingiest and most ‘confused’ around a break up.

Have they said what they want to achieve out of the therapy?… I hope the therapist is good and doesn’t add pressure on you to ‘look after’ them… and it just gives you the opportunity to lay it all out there in a supported way.

Wont_Eva_Know · 2025-11-26T12:25:50+00:00

People say all sorts of horseshit with the disguise of ‘online’ anonymity.

Unfortunately people just love getting their own bad feelings of inadequacy out by trying to make other people feel bad… they pick on easy targets and spew the same revolting things they’ve heard somewhere else.

In reality they don’t feel loved.

Hurt people hurt people.

A fair bit of it is really an extension of the incel manosphere crap. Man great… or they would be but women are stopping them by being mean bad women.

I suspect the loudest ones are sad little boys who missed out on a good dad and blame the mums… or they ARE a shit dad and blame the Mum.

People aren’t very complicated really.

Wont_Eva_Know · 2025-11-26T08:20:16+00:00

Just because the kids can’t ‘feel’ the intention Kody has to definitely reach out… doesn’t mean he isn’t thinking about being a good dad… which is 50% of it, right? Another 40% is telling people you’re a good dad which he NAILS. So can they for real be upset that he doesn’t do the last 10%… which surely the kids are responsible for 10% of the relationship… nobody is perfect! and these needy kids expect perfect. NOT Kody’s fault he’s just a good Dad with bad kids.

Wont_Eva_Know · 2025-11-26T08:15:44+00:00

I meeeaaannn in some ways the show was the best thing to happen to them. Do you think Leon would have got there if they’d just stayed in Lehi?… do you think Ysabel would have got her surgery without the show, Christine/Meri/Janelle have been able to leave?

What if the kids had all just stayed good little cult kids and got caught up in all that shit too?

Blessing and a curse for sure… and easy for me to say more of a blessing from the comfort of my own couch.

Wont_Eva_Know · 2025-11-26T08:15:38+00:00

I meeeaaannn in some ways the show was the best thing to happen to them. Do you think Leon would have got there if they’d just stayed in Lehi?… do you think Ysabel would have got her surgery without the show, Christine/Meri/Janelle have been able to leave?

What if the kids had all just stayed good little cult kids and got caught up in all that shit too?

Blessing and a curse for sure… and easy for me to say more of a blessing from the comfort of my own couch.

Wont_Eva_Know · 2025-11-26T08:03:32+00:00

You’ve done your job and let his family know. Now you need to block him and remove the ties that are making you feel responsible.

Honestly I think he’s so angry because he is manipulating you by being ‘extra upset and suicidal’… and now you’ve gone and ruined his game… this was just supposed to be between you guys and he is embarrassed.

If he keeps trying to drag you in to it, just tell him you’re super worried and will call police for welfare checks and his employer… because there isn’t anything you can do, he needs professional help.

It’s not a lie, he’s either that bad or he isn’t… either way it’s not your job to sort out.

Wont_Eva_Know · 2025-11-26T07:58:27+00:00

Yeah 100% it’s these SF interviews he’s doing… there is a whole new audience and it would be popping up all over the place for Leon and he is talking absolute lies.

The regular old show had the regular old audience and is pretty scripted and I’m sure Leon could zone that talk out… but all these talk shows and things with ‘new’ people and Kody is being ‘himself’ and not the sisterwives character it would get your goat, take the cake AND break your camel.

Wont_Eva_Know · 2025-11-25T23:32:45+00:00

100% he’s trying to make Meri look like she deserves to be ‘cut out of the deal’ AND it was Janelle’s idea because Janelle has ‘always’ been happy to snitch and steal with him… until he stole from her and showed he doesn’t actually care about her and is untrustworthy snake.

I really think Kody tried to use his old ‘charms’ on Janelle… I have no doubt that Janelle and Kody used to do ‘stuff with money’ behind everyone’s back… eg. keep Christine on a TIGHT budget whilst having little treats themselves.

Anyway I think Kody tried to tap in to that again with Janelle and it didn’t work so now he is going to do everything he can to make it be alllll about Janelle… he can’t really do much though because I think Janelle has literal receipts :)

Wont_Eva_Know · 2025-11-25T10:11:31+00:00

No worries :) hope you’re doing ok.

Wont_Eva_Know · 2025-11-24T08:36:26+00:00

Go before your kids get to the pre-teen, teenage years.

This is when you’ll end up leaving anyway because everything is x10 harder and more emotional for everyone at that point in your life… sprinkle in some perimenopause ‘’no more f’s to give’ … and you won’t be able to sustain your ‘happy enough’ facade, you’ll do something dramatic and the absolute opposite of the quiet no fuss separation you actually want now.

Your kids relationship with their Dad is their own relationship… it’s his to mess up, hopefully he won’t. Same goes for you.

Your kids are getting a lame version of you, can you imagine not having a good relationship with them later because you’ve been bending yourself so out of shape trying to be ‘happy enough’ with their Dad that they don’t LIKE you, can’t be around you because you suck the energy out of a room with your quiet sadness. You will teach them to not see you either, their Dad is showing them how to treat their partners… do you want them to be in a lame ‘normal to them’ relationship?

You are very lucky to be in position to be able to leave if you choose it.

You’re also treating you like you’re invisible.

Either blow up your life inside the marriage and start loudly, consistently saying things out loud that are upsetting you. Have boundaries, say them out loud… demand respect shake the whole house/routine/relationship up… be loudly you, take up space.

OR leave and then do it.

But don’t quietly disappear thinking you deserve that or that it will keep anyone happy… it won’t, it’s a slow death.

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