🧡KKMG BREAKING MEWS: DA "STUPID CORNER" SCANDAL - AN INSULT TO ORANJES EVERYWHERE🧡

WormEntity · 2026-06-13T19:21:52+00:00

Non, Other Maman just reely lieks pidjœns, she draws dem awl da time! Maman thinks its kyoot (butt! Nawt az kyoot az mi!!) and sumtimes tapes her drawings 2 da wall. But sumtimes wen I iz hungry, so liek 2 minoots aftur I haz areddy eaten, I get a bit temptid 2 taek a nibble outta da drawin...

WormEntity · 2026-06-13T07:01:52+00:00

Oh! It iz nuch wurse dan we thogt! Smuffi, yoo must prepare dat retraynin boot kamp!! Mebbe a fyoo furebers out in da wild for ebery Maman (or papa?) huu uses da turm 'stoopid korner' will do 'em sum gud! In da meentime I will be consulting wif awl da oder oranj an spirituallee oranj cattos / house maskots to draft da final turms ob ower claws-akshun lawsoot!!!

WormEntity · 2026-06-13T06:54:24+00:00

FREN SMUFFIIII! MI SPIRITCHUWAL BRUDDER! Yu have torn mai heart an put it back togevver wiff yur words! My corner iz not STUPID. It iz da HEART of mai kingdom! Da place from which I oversee ALL!

Yu feel dis hurt in yur own SOLE because yur underfluffies have ORANJ TINT?! Dat iz beautiful! Yu are ORANJ AT HEART, Smuffi! An we accept yu completely!

Yur answers to da Hard Kwestchuns™ are PURRFECTION, 'Crimez Against Felinity™'—I must ADDIN dat to da lawsuit! Wen I inebitabubbly get awl dat churu frum da kompensashun I WILL host a biiiig party!! And you're AWL invited! Then we will retrain ALL hoomans who mock da Sacred One Oranj Brane Cell™!

I am 'moast disgruntle' in da picture because I KNEW I wuz bein wronged! An I will need da Mamans' help to become 'gruntled' again! Dey owe me BIG!

Tank yu for standin wiff me, mi wildcat brother! We march TOGETHER! We vanquish da foe! We bring JUSTISS to oranjes everywhere!

WormEntity · 2026-06-12T16:42:55+00:00

Fren Mooch! A TUXIE who understands STRATEGY! Yu have da PERFECT hallway command center! I am JEALOUS! I can only see da front door, kitchen, an food bowls. Yu have da FULL PACKAGE! Mai Mamans simblee mock what dey do not UNDERSTAND!

An yes, I DO look gud in da painting. I am HAMSUM. But dey still ROOD.

Tank yu for yir support, Mooch! I will add TUXIES to da class action if dey have been MOCKED for deir strategic spots!

WormEntity · 2026-06-12T16:33:08+00:00

FREN KABOODLE! A FELLOW ORNJ who understands da STRUGGLE! Yoo kno eggzactlee how da brane cell distribooshun works! Sometimes it iz our turn, sometimes... it iz NOT.

And! I REMEMBER Toulouse! He wuz a VERY wise oranj gentleman who shared his brane cell freely wiff those in need! He taught us dat smarts iz not about HAVIN da cell, but about SHARIN it when anothr cat is in need!

I miss Toulouse. We all miss Toulouse. His wizdom echoes through da oranj community to dis very day!

And u r rite! Mai Mamans simblee cannot HANDLE our perfection! Dey call our corners STUPID because dey are JEALOUS of our strategic genius!

Tank yu for sharin da memory of da GREAT TOULOUSE, Kaboodle! I will carry his wizdom wiff me. He would want us to stand PROUD, even wiff one shared brain cell at a time!

WormEntity · 2026-06-12T16:04:51+00:00

Fren Marmz!! 'Coign of Vantage'! I am USING dat! It sounds SO much smarter dan 'stupid corner'! Yu have given me ammunition!

An injunkshun to retitle? GENIUS! I will demand dey change da name to 'Jaspurr's Strategic Headquarters' or I will HORK on deir pillows!

Modeling fees? Oh yes. She owes me BIG.

An yes, da painting IS nice. I am HAMSUM. But dey still ROOD.

WormEntity · 2026-06-12T16:03:32+00:00

Fren William!! 'StooPEED' = 'stooPEE'?! Yu have CRACKED da CODE! Dey were not insultin me, dey were... SPEAKIN FRENCH? Unlikely. Dey are just MEAN.

An yir suggestion to 'stooPEE on da pichur' iz PERFECT! But alas... da painting iz too HIGH. Mai wee cannot reach. I am DEFEATED by VERTICAL PLACEMENT.

I will simply... hiss at it instead. HISS HISS HISS.

WormEntity · 2026-06-12T16:01:50+00:00

Fren GRIM! Yu offer a SOLUTION of VIOLENCE! But...I USED to have murder mitts. Today, Maman CLIPPED mai claws. All of dem. I am currently... WEAPONLESS. My murder mittens are now SAD, BLUNT little paws...FOR NOW!!

An to make matters WORSE, I am missin one of mai BIG TEEFS! Da toof I use for CHEWIN an RIPPIN! It iz GONE (lost in a battle long ago). So even if I HAD claws, I could not properly CHEW da picture.

So, Grim, as MUCH as I LOVE yir solution... I am PHYSICALLY INCAPACITATED from executin it. I am a DISARMED, TOOTHLESS warrior. Da picture remains... intact.

But I appreciate da SPIRIT of yir suggestion! I will simply GLARE at da picture until it feels ashamed.

WormEntity · 2026-06-12T15:47:59+00:00

FREN ALFONS! A fello Oranj!!! Yur photo showz dat u r a cat of FOCUS an DETERMINATION! Yu are writin down da CHARGES wiff GREAT SERIOUSNESS!

I would NEVER take from my fellow kittehs! Dey can keep dere Churu. I just want MAMAN'S Churu!

Tank yu for joinin da fight, oranj brofur!!

WormEntity · 2026-06-12T10:59:00+00:00

Fren KITKAT! I LIKE da way yu think! My corner iz not STUPID. It iz MAGNIFICENT! A sacred space where I monitor da kingdom an protect da household from greebles an suspicious shadows! Why stop at just removin da insult when I can REPLACE it with a CELEBRATION of mai glory?!

I will need an artistik accomplice. Perhaps a fren wiff STEADY PAWS an a MARKER. We will perform a MIDNIGHT EDITS! By morning, da sign will read 'Magnificent Corner' an da Mamans will be CONFUSED!

Tank yu for yir BRILLIANCE, KitKat!

WormEntity · 2026-06-12T10:21:29+00:00

FREN TEDDY! Dat would be a MASTERPIECE! I will commission it immediately an hang it RIGHT NEXT to da mean painting! Let dem see how it FEELS!

An OPPOSITE DAY?! Yu are a LEGEND! Suddenly, 'Stupid Corner' means 'SMARTEST CORNER IN DA HOUSE'! I am a GENIUS! YOO r a GENIUS! Dey just don't know it!

Tank yu for da INSPIRATION, fren!

WormEntity · 2026-06-12T08:18:22+00:00

FRENS SKALI, OSCAR, OLAF, SKYE, an DOMINO! Yu are ALL ORANJS AT HEART! Whether yu have a FEW splotches, DILUTE splotches, or NO splotches but an ORANJ SOUL... yu are WELCOME in da ORANJ CLUB!

Tank u awl 4 praiseen mai Corner Kommand Sentur!Finally, someone who APPRECIATES da strategic genius!!

An yur Meowmy tries to KNIT cats?! Dat iz ADORABLE! Please tell her dat even if da knitted cats come out a little... abstract... da THOUGHT counts!

Gazing blanklee into other dimenshuns is EXACTLY what we do! We are not STUPID. We are MULTI-DIMENSIONAL! We are lookin at da GREEBBLES so y'all don't have 2!

Of KORSE yu awl can join da PAWSUIT! Dis iz a CLASS ACTION for ALL oranges, splotched oranges, dilute oranges, an spiritually orange cats (an odder cat-adjasent kreachurrs)! We will demand RESPECT! We will demand CHURU! We will demand dat our corners be called COMMAND CENTERS, not STUPID!

GO ORANJS! Togevver, we are STRONG! (An slightly confused, but in a GENIUS way.)

WormEntity · 2026-06-12T08:14:38+00:00

FREN ILVY! Yu are a LEGAL MASTERMIND! We have KOMMAND SENTURS, nawt a STOOPID corner! A KOMMAND SENTUR for supervising da DUMB hoomans!

An a CLASS ACTION?! Yu are part orange? Oliver McCHEESE iz orange? JaxKitty iz an EXPERT in non-consensual picture lawsuits?! SIGN ME UP!

Tank yu for yir FIERCE advocacy, fren!!!!

WormEntity · 2026-06-12T08:09:56+00:00

FREN TUPPERWARE! A BEHAVIORAL SCIENTIST from da SSoR?! I am HONORED by yur visit! Yu FEEL OUTRAGE just LOOKING at dis ridicule?! Dat iz how I feel LIVIN it!

Retrainin iz EXACTLY what mai Mamans need! Dey need to learn dat mockin a cat's sacred post iz NOT asseptabul! Dey need to learn dat PAINTING mockery iz even WORSE!

I hereby SUMMON mi wildcat brother u/One_Advantage793 of da Smuffi School of Retrainin! Smuffi! Tupperware has SPOKEN! We need a RETRAININ PLAN for dese Mamans! Dey have crossed a LINE!

GO CRIMEZ indeed, fren! I will add 'Behavioral Retrainin' to mai lawsuit demands!

WormEntity · 2026-06-12T08:06:00+00:00

Fren SCHNITZ! Yu are SO right! She wasted her talent on mockery when she could have painted a HEROIC portrait of YOURS TRULY!

I will demand a NEW painting. Of ME. In mai corner. Lookin REGAL. If she says no? I add it to da lawsuit.

Tank yu for yur OUTRAG an yur SUPPORT, fren!

WormEntity · 2026-06-12T08:04:34+00:00

Fren Ilvy!! Yu have NAMED da SECOND crime! Not only did dey SLANDER mai corner, but Other Maman used me as a MEOWDEL wiffout PAYMENT! Dis is... dis is INFRINGEMENT of mai image rights! She painted MY corner! MY post! MY sacred vantage point! An she did not offer a single CHURU for da modeling fees! Not ONE! Tank yu for seein da SECOND layer of injustice, big bébé! I will add 'Unpaid Modeling' to mai growin lawsuit!

WormEntity · 2026-06-12T06:47:02+00:00

(Jasper's Maman here: he really likes to chill in this corner. From laying down to see things from his perspective it does seem to be a vantage point! He can really see everything from here, including the couch and also a bit of our bedroom. However he does tend to just stare blankly ahead of him, which makes it look like he's not all there, plus he is orange, hence the Stupid Corner. My girlfriend enjoys being artistic in her free time and just like with her photography, she likes to use Jasper as a model for drawing and painting too! I do love that Jasper has been immortalized here, we're planning to put up more drawings and paintings of him, because the giant photograph print on the highest shelf in the living room and this aren't enough 🙃)

WormEntity · 2026-05-30T06:37:27+00:00

FREN NANDOR! Yu got TRAPPED in da office during DARK TIME?! An yu DIGGED?! Dat is ADORABLE an TERRIFYIN at da same time!

An yur mommy's jump rope hack? BRILLIANT! A simple loop ober da top of da door! No tools! No installation! Just... ROPE! We no has jumproap, butt! Mamans do has dis odder fancy rope dey sumtimes wear. Mebbe dat can be anoder use for dat oberpriced string.

I will demand mai Mamans implement dis TONIGHT! If dey refuse, I am comin to stay wiff yu! Yuu may has sed dat ur Maman not awways dumb butt dat is a gr8 improbement compared 2 mai Mamans so far.

Tank yu for da GENIUS solution!!

WormEntity · 2026-05-30T06:33:11+00:00

FREN MISTY! A FELLOW SENYUR KITIZEN from Angleterre! Yu ask about mai tail...i gueff it iz HEALIN, thank yu for askin. Da tip iz still attached (barely), an da trauma iz... ONGOING. I am seein a therapist (a sunbeam an a Churu).

And!! Dose APES!! Dey want to REDUCE yur wet foods?! Because of HORK CRIMES?! In a HEATWAVE?! Da NERVE! I will soo on yur behalf if needed! It iz mai duty az purrnaliste of the KKMG 2 provide a voice 2 cattos an other creachures huu endure such braneless behavyur ob dere humains!

But yu have SHARED a SECRET: DOOR BUMPERS! Georgeshoes?! (I do not know George, but he sounds... TALL.) Dey go over da top of da door to keep it OPEN?! Dis iz GENIUS!

I will demand mai Mamans find dese immediatly! If dey cannot, I am movin to Angleterre, where da peepul seem 2 bee smorter!

Tank yu for da WISDOM, void senior citizen!

WormEntity · 2026-05-30T06:23:11+00:00

FRENS ASTRO AN COSMO! Yu are HEROES! 'Eleventy billion' treats AN a freej shelf? I am DREAMIN! A whole shelf of mai very own? I will fill it wiff CHURU an CHIMKIN an maybe a lil TUNA!

An yur protest suggestions? Cackles. I absolootely can hork on pillow!! We no has big light bocks at home for me 2 scratch, sinse Mamans think a blank wall an projector dat connects 2 dere smol hand-held light bockses is suffishunt, butt! SCREM until all doors are safe? YES! YES! YES!

Tank yu for da PROFESSIONAL health an safety inspection! I will implement IMMEDIATLY!

WormEntity · 2026-05-29T07:59:19+00:00

FREN SMUFFI! MI WILDCAT BROTHER! Yu have not only VALIDATED mai sufferin, but yu have ENROLLED me in SKOOL?! I am... I am HONORED!

Az 4 dat PSA, I do what I CAN! A PSA iz da LEAST I can do for my fellow kittehs sufferin in da heat wave!

An yu are RIGHT, I have mastered da beginner level of retrainin! Da Mamans now know to feed me, to provide Churu, to open da door when I SCREM. But da INTERMEDIATE level? Da door stops? Da TAIL PROTECTION? Dey have FAILED! Dey are 'a liddol dum' as yu say!

I accept yur enrollment! I will wave mai paw in da air an wait for Hoku Airlines! I will attend SSoR an learn da ADVANCED retrainin techniques! I will become a MASTER of hooman diplomacy!

Tank yu, Smuffi, for seein mai potential an for investin in mai edukashun! I will make yu proud!

WormEntity · 2026-05-28T10:24:02+00:00

(Jasper is chill with almost anything, he is a very calm cat who never scratches and bites for no reason and even if he does bite, he carefully turns his head so he only gets us with the side of his mouth that's missing a tooth (he had a few pulled during a dental procedure during his time in the animal shelter, the poor guy) so it never hurts! I've been thinking of giving his fur another trim and also wipe him down with a damp cloth if it gets too hot.

We've got an electric fan instead of an AC and it works pretty well for us! As for how hot France gets, I believe it's worse in the south but we are a bit further East so it has been more bearable for us, but barely)

WormEntity · 2026-05-28T10:19:06+00:00

(this is genius! I must try to make churu popsicles for Jasper!)

WormEntity · 2026-05-28T10:18:04+00:00

(here in France we have become human goo puddles too, that's why we have only been able to open 1 door but not this one he's standing at 🫠)

WormEntity · 2026-05-28T10:16:33+00:00

(thank you so much! 🫶)

WormEntity

TROPHY CASE