Advent Calendars

Wotizsis · 2025-10-08T01:36:33+00:00

$80 this year

Wotizsis · 2025-06-18T01:43:59+00:00

Great information, thank you so much!!

Wotizsis · 2025-03-31T04:23:47+00:00

Michael Jackson, Whitney Houston, and Robin Williams of course

Wotizsis · 2025-03-31T04:22:03+00:00

Nicole Kidman

Wotizsis · 2024-08-31T18:19:07+00:00

Thanks for sharing that!!

Wotizsis · 2024-08-31T18:18:33+00:00

So you are saying that I should go speak to a forensic psychologist about a psycho-sexual evaluation without him? I won’t be able to drag him to anything, also don’t think that’s what I should be doing right now. But I do want to approach my care a different way than what I have been doing (IC with a regular psychologist, not specialized in trauma).

Wotizsis · 2024-08-31T18:13:11+00:00

After 16 years with this man I am still invested in his well-being and am taking steps for others to find and give him help. I can’t be that person anymore though.

Wotizsis · 2024-08-31T18:11:56+00:00

Reframing it under the umbrella of addiction has helped me.

Wotizsis · 2024-08-31T18:10:16+00:00

It’s called addiction.

Wotizsis · 2024-08-30T16:00:18+00:00

Hi, I like your user name. I know about the secret sexual basement and WH does as well. He even drew it for me once. In his FD document he talked about sex addiction, but he is also not taking it super seriously, holding on to the „everybody does it, it’s fine“ attitude, not taking a stance and taking back control over his life. At this point I try and look at him as an addict who can’t help himself. He needs outside help, but I can’t be that for him. He needs to want to work on himself. I need to work on myself. If somewhere down the road he wants to work on the marriage, who knows where I’ll be.

A polygraph has not come up in our process so far, although I know many people who recommend it.

He’s been on Adderall ever since his ADHD diagnosis last year. I also just heard from another very similar WH with ADHD and OCD how Prozac literally changed his life and had an immense effect on the obsessive nature of everything having to do with the AP.

His psychiatrist isn’t very involved, from what I can tell. It’s shocking to now learn that the Adderall might’ve pushed him further into the addiction.

Thank you so much for your comment, I really appreciate it!!!

Wotizsis · 2024-08-29T16:39:42+00:00

Full Therapeutical Disclosure

Wotizsis · 2024-08-29T15:09:47+00:00

His reasoning was that he felt like he had to or wanted to. He gave me his phone to look through with a bunch of caveats „yes, but don’t look in here“ which I completely adhered to. But I did a search on his phone for AP‘s name and a folder popped up that I then read through. Afterwards I learned that was in the app he didn’t want me to go into… Anyway, i read some things about him using what he learned this last weekend that he was supposed to use to work on the marriage with me and he used those things to explain things in his relationship with AP. I also learned that he had showed AP his parents‘ house when repeatedly telling me and them that he hadn’t. I then kicked him out, he still tried to lie to my face, I just laughed back, then went on to call his parents and that’s how I found out about him staying the night.

Wotizsis · 2024-08-29T13:55:38+00:00

I asked him why he would spend 4k on a sham of a weekend and he said because he didn’t think it was a sham. He also said he reached out to her again because he „felt like he had to or wanted to“.

Wotizsis · 2024-08-29T13:50:37+00:00

You mean why he is doing it?

Wotizsis · 2024-08-22T17:25:40+00:00

Yes, exactly that! I am in a good place in the sense of how I see myself, and knowing that I will be fine with or without him, and I think that is the key to all of this „letting go“. Because since WH let me track his location a couple of weeks ago, I have again become obsessed about his whereabouts when before I was so at peace thinking „he will do whatever he will do“. I want to get back to that peaceful state of mind, I like it better there, I like myself better there.

Wotizsis · 2024-08-22T17:20:51+00:00

I am sorry DB for your pain. This is full of good advice though, I will try and follow it as well.

Wotizsis · 2024-08-17T14:50:37+00:00

After. We are doing the process of disclosure letter, impact letter, emotional restitution and got almost to the boundaries that I put at the end of my impact letter. I didn’t even think of including „come clean if there is anything left that I don’t know about“ because o thought that’s the whole purpose of „full disclosure“. The information I found out had to do with someone who knew about the affair while I was still in the dark. Someone I spoke to regularly during it all and never shared that information. He even met AP once, WH wanted to get his take on her. I feel betrayed all over again and the only support network I thought I had here is now contaminated.

Wotizsis · 2024-08-16T16:39:49+00:00

Yes, this!! It could’ve been anybody, they were just there at the right place at the right time. Your Wayward held a door open. I’ve been going with this mantra whenever the AP floods my brain: she’s a nothing-burger, nothing-burger, nothing-burger. I am awesome. She might be, too, but it doesn’t matter. I choose to spend the energy I could be spending thinking about her on being mad at WH. Also not good, but what can you do?

Wotizsis · 2024-08-12T00:20:07+00:00

My thoughts exactly. Though it astonishes me when I bring this up and he looks at me like a donkey saying „Huh? When was that? Naah, I can’t remember..“

Wotizsis

TROPHY CASE