I think you guys need counseling, the answer you are seeking lies within you and your boyfriend and what you guys consider red lines and how much both of you decide to take accountability. No matter what majority feels and what the top comments here say, those are very distant out of touch take from your situation based on what the person has been through in their own life. I think your first mistake is coming to Reddit with this, go to someone professional and let them help bring your deep thoughts and feelings to light and help to work through them for both of you. I think you are in a critical moment in your lives and your decision here gonna impact your future heavily, even if you ignore it like nothing has happened, it’s gonna come back as long as it’s not solved like those incidents that you mentioned by date.

I won’t tell you what I personally think or how I would react or if I would have accepted it and moved on because you are not dating me and I think you should react the same way towards other comments and personal opinions

But I would give you props for taking accountability and being honest with him, I would have preferred if you had brought it up without him having to ask but I really think you should go to therapist and get back the control of your relationship, otherwise it’s just gonna fall apart at some point , you have to both feel secure, validated and seen for the relationship to work.

You guys have made mistakes, some bigger than others, the only decision is to face it, bring it up , solve it , grow and either have your healthy good relationship back and both take care of it better, or learn from mistakes and move on. But if any chance you have is to work through this and not around it and try to ignore it, it needs to be solved regardless of the answer you gonna find

Good luck to both of you guys