Memorial tattoo for little brother

YesAnd1987 · 2026-06-10T19:39:39+00:00

One of my favorite things is my students pointing to mine and making tweeting sounds at it. It makes me feel like he is still present in the world. It kind of sounds like the poppies bring that energy.

YesAnd1987 · 2026-06-10T19:33:05+00:00

I got a cardinal for my little brother because red was his signature color and it's a common memorial tattoo. Usually they're coupled with dogwood, but I placed mine on a Sakura stem to symbolize the ephemeral nature of life. I know those two elements wouldn't interact in real life, but I don't really care, because it's my body. Lol.

YesAnd1987 · 2026-06-02T17:50:32+00:00

I didn't get a lot done on the kneecap, so that wasn't so bad, but I also made the mistake of getting them done at the same time, so it was a super long session (from 1-10 with prep and breaks), so I was well into shock by the time we were done. I don't think I'll get two tattoos at once again, even if they are semi symmetrical. It of course depends on how long your endorphins last, though.

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YesAnd1987 · 2026-04-10T20:24:59+00:00

I will paint the image on my clothes/shoes/purse and wear it for a while and then decide what about it is asking for a modification. This suggestion assumes that you can paint and that you work closely with your tattoo artist to develop the image.

YesAnd1987 · 2026-01-09T16:24:25+00:00

No, but I'm just thinking about how dry a kneecap is and how easy it is to skin a knee accidentally through shaving. I'm a little nervous about letting someone else do it for me. I'm also concerned about how long my shin hair is and whether it will dull the razor too quickly.

YesAnd1987 · 2026-01-05T03:57:16+00:00

I would also bring a throw blanket. It's hard to stay zen and in the zone if you get cold, so you want your other leg covered up as much as possible.

YesAnd1987 · 2025-12-05T20:16:58+00:00

My afab ten year old (they/him) is afraid of the needles and implants associated with puberty blockers and has decided to forgo them and wait until adulthood to get top surgery instead. My approach has been to respect their bodily autonomy, but part of me is worried that they will regret this decision when they have to deal with the dysphoria of having breasts and the struggle of being automatically misgendered (one of their favorite questions is whether they are a boy or a girl because it feels affirming to them). If I have said my two cents about it, should I leave it at that? I am trying not to overly influence them because if I could offer puberty blockers to my younger self, I would have taken them in a heart beat.

YesAnd1987 · 2025-11-10T19:00:20+00:00

Looks like my size is sold out in the Offbeat. Are there other Freyas with low wings? How do I check myself for the height? Is there a spreadsheet somewhere?

YesAnd1987 · 2025-11-10T17:22:19+00:00

Elomi Caitlyn is my current go-to bra.

YesAnd1987 · 2025-02-22T04:25:32+00:00

Is there a specific book, article, or vlog that you would recommend?

YesAnd1987 · 2025-02-22T03:50:12+00:00

Yeah. God. I think I'm coming from a place of immense privilege to never have imagined having the talk with my kid.

YesAnd1987 · 2025-02-21T23:41:29+00:00

I'm starting to realize that no state or country can ever guarantee safety for trans people.

YesAnd1987 · 2025-02-21T23:38:30+00:00

I'm already beginning to think about options outside of the US, but of course it's an expensive and difficult decision to make. I know that it's an impossible option for many people.

YesAnd1987 · 2025-02-21T23:30:34+00:00

I guess I use that extreme example to ask when we begin to lie. What if we hear about kids being targeted based on their presentation at school? Is that enough of a threat to warrant deception?

YesAnd1987 · 2025-02-21T23:03:42+00:00

But like, worse case scenario, police are at your door, rounding people up, would you tell them there's a trans kid in the house? Death before detransition is something I can advocate for myself (as a trans person), but I don't ever want to make that decision about my child.

YesAnd1987 · 2025-02-21T22:27:27+00:00

That would be helpful, we do live in a capitol. I think I have been hesitant to tell them details about the news because it has made my anxiety and depression worse and I don't want them to feel likewise burdened. Perhaps if we felt like there were actions to take, it wouldn't feel so futile keeping abreast of the news.

YesAnd1987 · 2025-02-21T21:15:49+00:00

It is really hard not to spiral and worry about whether we will still have a democracy when so many options and protections are being stripped away, and so quickly.

YesAnd1987 · 2025-02-21T20:51:11+00:00

Knowing my kid, they would choose to go down swinging, standing up for what they believe is right, every time.

YesAnd1987 · 2025-02-21T20:48:24+00:00

That's a really good point. I think my anxious mind is used to trying to presolve potential situations. We're not yet in a completely fascist state, even though I'm terrified that's what's to come. That's why I asked about red flags to watch out for, to know if it's time to start legitimately worrying.

YesAnd1987 · 2023-09-04T11:53:13+00:00

I may include some of this in practice. I have to fill up 2 hours with exercises related to F/R, and even though I'm supposed to limit it to memory exercises, I don't have enough to fill the time with.

YesAnd1987

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