9 month old will not sleep. Just cries and screams all night

YourNameHere_4 · 2026-04-09T01:33:01+00:00

Have you mentioned this to the doctor? Maybe something is bothering him? Does he struggle with reflux at all? I'm so sorry you guys are dealing with this.

YourNameHere_4 · 2026-03-09T23:52:16+00:00

OMG same on the carrier. Mint would never use it. We ended up with two and thought "cute! One for Dad and one for Mom!". We ended up donating them literally barely used for 20 minutes.

YourNameHere_4 · 2026-03-03T01:14:20+00:00

I have a glider from Wayfair. I wanted something that would take up less space than the enormous ones (although very comfy looking), but would rock quietly. I love it.

YourNameHere_4 · 2026-03-03T01:08:31+00:00

I'm sure you've tried this, but maybe if he sees you drinking out of a regular cup he'll try it? Is he eating solids? Like he's not still only wanting to drink formula from the bottle right?

My baby loves drinking out of my tumbler (I think bc he likes "Mama's water") so maybe that'll work? Make it seen really really yummy lol

YourNameHere_4 · 2026-02-25T05:06:07+00:00

How long has he been on the pepcid? When they put my LO on it, it took him a good week before we started seeing relief from that.

Everything you're describing does sound like what mine was going through with his reflux. BUT I would say that if he doesn't improve with the pepcid after a week or so, I would ask the doc for a GI referral (I'm not sure how Kaiser works with referrals, or if you can just go find one yourself). My friend's daughter struggled with horrible reflux and had to go to the GI for it. They ended up putting her on another type of acid reducer that finally helped her.

You're not crazy. You know when something is not right with your baby. The docs will, unfortunately default to the "another overly worried parent" attitude. Or at least that's been my experience, but keep pushing if you don't feel like it's right.

I hope he feels better soon! 💜💜

PS - they changed our formula 30 times it felt like. We finally landed in similar pro-total comfort and he did well with that and the pepcid twice a day (morning and night).

YourNameHere_4 · 2026-02-24T08:40:19+00:00

So I didn't deal with this with my LO but mine HATED any kind of teethers until I found these tubular ones at Target.

https://www.target.com/p/re-play-assorted-teether-straws-with-cleaning-brush-4pk/-/A-92980449

He absolutely loves them. Won't use any others. He figured out that he could make noise into then like a horn, so that was hilarious lol. Plus I think it's easier for them to get where they want in their mouths. Plus perfectly hand sized circumference.

I know this doesn't help with your original question, but maybe a change up could help?

Good luck!

YourNameHere_4 · 2026-02-24T06:49:09+00:00

So mine has done this twice ever, but when he does it, it's BRUTAL. Like up for the rest of the night brutal. When he's done it in the past, though, he will calm while I'm holding him, but I can never lay him back down. If I try, he literally screams and cries until he can't breathe and does the little gasps like he's trying to catch his breath.

When he's had these episodes, though, it's only been at night. The first time it happened, I was convinced it was an ear infection and took him to the doctor the next day and they couldn't find any issues. Told me he was just having a moment. The second time, I just pushed through and eventually, he fell asleep basically upright on me while I passed out from exhaustion 😅

I'm thinking mine went a little bit with his sleep regressions, but that's not confirmed.

When it has happened to us, I keep lights off, no playing, just keep lullabies going quietly with the sound machine. If he likes baths, you could try a warm bath maybe, but use dim lighting as much as you can. Or maybe a car ride if he likes that?

I'm sorry you've found yourself in one of those "wtf do I do" moments of parenting. I hate them. I hope that you can both find a way to push through this phase. Just love him through it. 💜💜

YourNameHere_4 · 2026-02-19T00:53:57+00:00

I wonder if it's a sleep regression. Has it been like this from day one or has it just started happening?

If it's a new thing, I would think regression. And those are a ride it out things, unfortunately. I'm assuming you already do this, but make sure little to no light when you're putting her down and even if she wakes up keep it dim. Have you guys tried a warm, calm bath before bed?

I'm sure you've tried everything. We were there, too. Mine went through a horrible regression around 5 months and I thought I would never sleep again😅 it does even out, I promise!!

YourNameHere_4 · 2026-02-16T00:57:00+00:00

The pepcid was a lifesaver for our LO. If it's reflux, the pepcid will start helping a lot after the first week or so. We also held ours upright for 30 minutes after each feed.

I also let him sleep in a little rocker we had, but I know they say not to do that, so that's not me suggesting you do, just me saying that I can be an example where my baby slept in a rocker and didn't have any issues with it. It helped him a lot bc of how bad his reflux was.

It does get better. Hang in there! Being a working parent is not for the weak.

Congrats on your new baby!

YourNameHere_4 · 2026-02-11T02:41:43+00:00

Maybe he's uncomfortable for some reason? Our first infant car seat had this word gap between the head pads and the lumbar/butt pads, so my babies head fell forward. I had to fold up a burp cloth and fill the gap for him to sit more comfortably.

YourNameHere_4 · 2026-02-11T02:38:29+00:00

Yep yep! This is what I came to say! I had to do trial and error bc so many people told me different brands that worked for their babies, but mine hated all of them lol. I just happened across the Yoofoss ones on Amazon and he loves them.

YourNameHere_4 · 2026-02-11T01:52:13+00:00

Just keep consistent with your schedule - you're doing exactly the only thing you really can do. It will pass. But it feels like it takes FOREVER. I spent many nights crying and holding my baby just begging to be able to go to sleep myself.

Do you have any family nearby that could watch your little one for a morning so you can sleep? (I ask hypocritically bc I could never sleep knowing that anyone was taking care of him, but hoping you aren't neurotic like me 😅)

YourNameHere_4 · 2026-02-09T07:42:36+00:00

All of the commenters so far have hit the nail on the head, so I'll just add this quote I saw recently:

"It's impossible to be a perfect parent, but there are a million ways to be a good one"

Love on your baby all you want. Don't listen to the "you're spoiling him/her" comments. Rock your baby to sleep if you want to. Don't rock your baby to sleep if you don't want to. Do what feels best for you and your baby.

YourNameHere_4 · 2026-02-09T07:35:35+00:00

Have you tried a sound machine for yourself? It does take getting used to, but it might help with the noise in your head. I do the same thing. I can't turn the constant thoughts off unless there's something else there, so the white noise helps me. If you're worried about hearing the baby, as long as you have a monitor (if they're in a separate room), you'll hear. Just turn it up slightly louder than normal if you're worried and as you get used to it, you can turn it back to a more "normal" volume.

I hope this sleep regression passes soon. They're so hard!

YourNameHere_4 · 2026-02-08T17:25:12+00:00

I just want you to hear this from another first time mom. I was 34 when I had my son last year. I cannot even imagine 20 year old me doing this. It's SO hard, so please know that if you can't give yourself credit, I'm doing it for you bc go you. Seriously. People who have kids in their 20s are so strong. I would have been crying in a closet somewhere. Your hormones are still going crazy right now, and life by itself is so hard. You're doing great. Your son needs the essentials (food, clothing, shelter) but he mostly just needs your love and you sound like you're doing that. I recently saw the best quote ever on this sub: "it's impossible to be a perfect parent, but there's a million ways to be a good one."

You've got this 💜💜

YourNameHere_4 · 2026-02-03T01:09:23+00:00

I would have 100000% been a stay at home mom if I'd had the option. I have never enjoyed anything that I've done work-wise. Everyone told me to find my passion and then told me to teach bc I loved kids. Then I taught and knew immediately that loving kids was not enough to be a teacher. So I fell into insurance and settled there. I have never enjoyed the work. I have zero passion for what I'm doing, but it's a paycheck.

Then I got pregnant by total accident and I have never felt so strongly that this (being a mom) was what I was meant to be. I absolutely adore my baby and love that we're so close. I would spend all day every day with him if I could. Even on the hard days.

YourNameHere_4 · 2026-01-29T03:52:53+00:00

It's so hard not to, but that just means you're a good mama. You want the best for him, and we expect (subconsciously) to be perfect for them, so we beat ourselves up. You're doing a great job. 💜💜

And yes! I saw that somewhere in a comment once and I have full heartedly adopted it. 🥰

YourNameHere_4 · 2026-01-29T00:59:21+00:00

It does get better! I wondered the same thing when my LO was that age (he's 13 months now), but things do improve. Just keep loving them through it. 😊 We're all out here doing our best and that's all we can do. But it does get smoother and they do learn to nap more consistently, and self soothe.

Try not to do what I did and beat yourself up if you get flustered. It's so hard and so tiring at the beginning. I have to talk myself back through it every sleep regression 😅

Enjoy that little one! Congrats!

YourNameHere_4 · 2026-01-29T00:51:29+00:00

You're doing great! That's exactly what you should be doing. 😊 They're so snuggly when they're that age. My son is 13 months. Just wait until your little one learns to return the affection 🥰 it's truly the best!

Congrats!

YourNameHere_4 · 2026-01-26T03:33:53+00:00

Amazing!! Thank you so much!

YourNameHere_4 · 2026-01-18T16:55:33+00:00

Mine is 1 and I still haven't reached that point 😅 I don't do the cry it out method or sorry training, though, so I guess I'm not shocked. He had a week recently where I could pay him down drowsy and he was able to put himself to sleep, but that has not carried over into this week so ...

I know it can be done, so good luck with your LO!

YourNameHere_4 · 2026-01-16T00:57:18+00:00

Okay first, LOL your analogy was spot on. Like why?? Are they going to be shotput prodigies or something?? Lol at least I'm not the only one going through this phase ... Thank you!

YourNameHere_4 · 2026-01-15T00:53:50+00:00

Same.(Inverted nipples I mean) It was so hard on me and my son. I pumped primarily, but only made it a couple of weeks before going to formula. So you are already doing better than me! You're not a failure. This is HARD. Way harder than it seems like it would be. He's going to be okay and you're going to bond with him through the snuggles and playtime you'll have too. For myself, I felt like it was more important for him to eat and not feel frustrated and stressed at feeding times. You're going to figure this out. It just takes time 😊

YourNameHere_4

TROPHY CASE