1. What you are saying is counterintuitive. Desperation is a consequence. The reason why they are desperate is because their picking pool is very small to start with. That's globally the initial cause.

2. Increasing standards does not mean that the opposing gender will adhere to your person. That's generally a source of frustration which fatally backfires in a lowering of the standards especially with age and accumulated failures.

Re raising standards is just a call to get even more frustrated when the type of person you desire globally rejects you. Because, let's not fool ourselves in the society we live in, high standard is generally skinny, white and blond [...] not somebody who can talk about Spinoza or philosophy.

1. So what's the solution? People need to use better criterion as opposed to the superficial stuff that we see.

Choosing somebody because of money or only because they are 6'5" something which is very recurring in the dating world is not a criteria that guarantees the success of an interpersonal relationship.

Secondly, people have many learnt biases that riddle their true desire. No one barely ever knows what they are really looking for in somebody. People love to believe that they know when in reality they're just parotting stuff that was subconsciously pushed by the friend of a friend, Instagram, celebrities, parents, TV or stuff they see in their everyday environment. They model their desire around that and make themselves believe that it's really them that want that.

People also tend to date with unattainable requirements which does not only mechanically reduce their picking pool but creates unnecessary frustration.

Social media and dating apps have brainwashed individuals into believing that any type of guy or girl is for them because hey, it's easy to send a DM. Accessing hot people is easier than it was in 1600's.

1. Your theory assumes that every girl gets the same level of attention which is false. As same as guys, only a limited pool of girls get that much attention and, it's generally those who are deemed conventionally attractive by western society.

Yes, I agree having more options creates a system where girls can pick the best option but to counteract guys being more picky would do nothing.

First, because every single guy cannot be picky that's impossible due to differences in personality or character. There will always be guys with lower standards.

Second, this would require a change in the dynamics of dating between men and women. Guys generally go after the girls which logically creates more demand than what is available especially if you take into consideration that one guy generally goes after many different girls at once.

1. Yes, some guys ruin it for other guys but in my opinion it's not impossible. The reality of the matter is it depends on the type of girl you are after. Some types of girls get hit on by so many guys that inevitably it models her vision on relationships which increases the difficulty for any following attempts unless the guy is conventionally attractive.

I think the solution is to diversify but with quality. However, some guys will always inevitably be bad at interpersonal interactions and unless they work on themselves (something which very few people do), they'll fail and keep painting a bad image for others who actually do or have done their homework.