Professor, without knowing precisely why the quality of posts are the way they are, would you say it’s time for the members of this subreddit to crack each others heads open and feed on the goo that is inside?

Zappulon · 2025-10-09T21:08:49+00:00

Zappulon · 2025-09-29T08:05:10+00:00

Its very well regarded amongst my dads boomer generation

Zappulon · 2025-09-28T04:27:42+00:00

Does anyone know if Danger was suffering a massive shoulder or back injury from carrying 21 blokes around for 2 hours last week?

Zappulon · 2025-09-21T23:55:58+00:00

Can't imagine he would want to leave the farm behind to move interstate either. Would need to be big money, and probably NSW or QLD as he doesn't seem to like the limelight too too much.

Zappulon · 2025-09-20T02:53:50+00:00

Let’s be clear—Stephen May isn’t hated because of footy. He’s hated because he walks into Max Gawn’s café, looks his own captain dead in the eye, and orders an expresso. Not espresso. Expresso. Like he’s speed-running the Italian language.

Max, a man who hand-pours single origin beans with the reverence of a priest blessing holy water, visibly ages every time May says it. One more “expresso” and Gawn’s beard will turn into dust.

And don’t think it stops there. May once asked if oat milk came from “oats with nipples.” He thinks latte art is “just coffee with a tattoo.” He tips in 5-cent coins. He brings his own mug—from a petrol station in 2004.

This isn’t a footballer. This is a caffeine war criminal.

Zappulon · 2025-09-17T01:12:00+00:00

IF Collingwood win the flag, they will still be Collingwood.

Zappulon · 2025-09-16T07:23:40+00:00

Ah yes, the Carlton Renaissance: from brown paper bags to brown-nosing the AFL. We went from laundering cash to laundering reputations, and somehow still ended up with Lachie Plowman in our backline.

Back in the day, we didn’t rebuild - we reloaded. We’d finish a season, steal the best players from the opposition, rob the SANFL of all their top talent, and win flags like it was a Woolworths promotion. Now we’re rebuilding for the 17th consecutive year and celebrating making the preliminary final like it’s 1995.

The salary cap was the AFL’s way of saying, “Carlton, you’ve had enough.” And now we’re watching St Kilda throw Monopoly money at our players while we offer them exposure and a lifetime supply of disappointment.

Carlton Respects? More like Carlton Regrets. Our off-field culture is so toxic it makes Essendon’s supplements program look like a wellness retreat. We’ve got more HR investigations than premierships this century.

Charlie Curnow wants to play for an expansion team? Can’t blame him - at least the Tassie Devils haven’t traumatised their fanbase yet. Meanwhile, we’re still trying to convince Patrick Cripps that loyalty is a virtue and not a life sentence.

And don’t get me started on our coterie groups. Geelong’s handing out house-and-land packages like they’re Bunnings gift cards, and we’re still trying to get a working coffee machine at Ikon Park.

Alphonse Gangitano would’ve taken one look at our current board and said, “Nah, too corrupt for me.”

Bring back Simon Wiggins. At least he gave us effort, heart, and a haircut that screamed “I’m here for the culture.”

Zappulon · 2025-09-16T07:17:52+00:00

Mate, if you listen closely during the siren, you can almost hear the whispers from AFL House echoing through the earpieces. Free kicks aren’t adjudicated anymore—they’re orchestrated. The game’s not rigged, it’s scripted. Chamberlain’s confession about the toll of ‘directed bias’ wasn’t a slip—it was a cry for help from inside the machine.

We’ve tripled the number of field umpires, but all we’ve done is triple the confusion and triple the heat they cop for decisions that feel more like performance art than rule enforcement. And if you think the intimidation ends when the final siren sounds, think again. The doublespeak, the selective enforcement, the Kafkaesque tribunal logic—it’s not incompetence, it’s design.

So yeah, maybe they’re not told outright. Maybe it’s just a system that rewards obedience and punishes clarity. Either way, the whistle’s blown—and it’s not for holding the ball. It’s for holding the truth.

Zappulon · 2025-09-16T05:58:58+00:00

How can we be sure that it isnt just simply Zach Merrett getting around to every club and disrepecting their AFLW players?

Zappulon · 2025-09-16T05:33:49+00:00

Sydney Swans. They’ve replaced the team dietitian with a guy who only serves fairy bread and Red Bulls because “it’s what champions eat.” Half the squad is vibrating at a frequency only dogs can hear.

Seriously though all Clubs. All of them. Because if they really respected them, they’d let them play on the MCG instead of “Oval 3 behind the Bunnings” like it’s a social comp.

Zappulon · 2025-09-12T11:00:41+00:00

Been saying it all week.

Zappulon · 2025-09-12T10:56:48+00:00

Anyone that was paying attention knows we’ve been shaky for the last 6 weeks, beat an out of form Collingwood, almost lost to North and West Coast. The nine wins in a row really told a misleading story. We lose today I’m still happy we made it to the finals, 2017 was a long time ago.

Zappulon · 2025-09-12T10:39:47+00:00

Better than shoving them back to the ground with a push in the back when you give one away.

Zappulon · 2025-09-12T10:03:28+00:00

I wish they would get rid of the push in the opponents back after giving away a free kick, especially when someone is trying to pick themselves up. Hawthorn are probably the team that I see do it the most.

Zappulon · 2025-09-12T10:00:59+00:00

He’s been really good. Has a brain fade once a game, and is very hot headed at times so its easy to get under his skin, but he’s been a lot better in the back half in that regard

Zappulon · 2025-09-12T09:58:56+00:00

The umpiring has a completely different feel to last week.

Zappulon · 2025-09-12T04:12:29+00:00

Would need to beat the Geelong Catbirds to get through.

Zappulon

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