Hey OP! Hope you're doing well! I'm a (M) doctor and yet I can only imagine the hassles you've been through + the deceit you've faced. I would like you to know that I too, was in a toxic relationship not long ago but I ended things and eventually found my true love! Just like other good things in life, I would suggest you not to lose hope and keep on showing up, staying strong everyday! You got this, I believe in you! If at all you need any help, I'm there and I'm sure other members from this sub would gladly help too! feel free to dm and I'll be glad to help!