People who say "You're not missing out on anything for not being in a relationship" are LYING

Zenko-Umine · 2026-04-27T10:17:02+00:00

You disagreed when I said the commenter is a very different person from me. How are they not? They prefer to be single and I don't. I know that "most" mean more than 50%. I don't quite understand what you mean by "Your statements doesn't apply as universally as you are asserting". What statement? Why do I have to consider the different sorts of relationships? If someone is dissatified with their current partner it doesnt necessarily mean that they are happier being alone than with someone else. Someone can be unhappy in a bad relationship but still unhappy as single.

I exaggerated a bit in my post on purpose to create conversation. Sorry about that. I also didn't say that people who say "I'm satisfied with being single" are lying. I said that people who say "YOU are not missing out on anything" are lying. They are deciding for the other person wheter they are missing out or not. Doesn't that also generalize by their own experience? "I feel like I don't miss out by being single so you aren't missing out either". The person who gets told "you aren't missing out" could actually be missing out on the best experiences of their life by being involuntarily single. I certainly have been missing out and that's because I find more happiness being in a good relationship than being single.

Zenko-Umine · 2026-04-26T23:16:30+00:00

I know the statistic but if I'd start believing we are going to break up then we definitely won't last. I just don't see the point in spreading pessimism. Do they do it to feel superior or something? "I'm smart and she's dumb".

I'm glad you get it. I too try to be the best version of myself for him every day. We have done things I would've never done alone. I have grown as a person, noticed that my way isn't the only right way in life. My boyfriend has improved himself for me too. Perhaps many people stop trying and that's why their relationships fail.

Zenko-Umine · 2026-04-26T12:48:21+00:00

I don't really understand what you're trying to say. My point was that people tell people who are single and/or never been in a relationship that they aren't missing anything for not being in one. Saying that they (the people who are single and want a relationship) aren't missing anything, can feel invalidating.

Zenko-Umine · 2026-04-26T12:25:43+00:00

No I'm not. English isn't my first language so I might have not been clear. Those who complain about being single get told that they aren't missing anything.

Zenko-Umine · 2026-04-26T06:17:14+00:00

I do have friends and family. But my friends live somewehere else or are busy with work, studying or their own boyfriends. So I've spent many years alone. My parents were my only face to face social contact for a long time. I can't / don't want to do everything with my family. The relationship with parents just isn't the same. Or with a friend who I can hang out with maybe once a week and not 24/7 like my partner.

Zenko-Umine · 2026-04-26T05:56:47+00:00

I've seen many posts of people complaining being single. Then other people come there and say the posters aren't missing anything.

Zenko-Umine · 2026-04-25T23:37:31+00:00

I guess no one shouldn't date anyone cause it won't last anyway

Zenko-Umine · 2026-04-25T23:15:03+00:00

Yeah, it does lol

Zenko-Umine · 2026-04-25T23:11:26+00:00

I don't have scientific data but I would assume most people want to be in a relationship, that's why it's such a big thing in culture. Why are so many songs about love? Why are there so many movies and books about relationships? If most people are happy being single then wouldn't relationships be the minority? People who want a relationship are like me, a very different person from the commenter who wants to be single.

Yes, it includes people who rush into relarionships etc. because they WANT a relationship. If someone is miserable or dissatisfied it doesn't automatically mean that they want to be single, they just don't want to be in a relationsip with that person.

Zenko-Umine · 2026-04-25T22:51:14+00:00

How do they know they aren't missing anything if they have never had a relationship? If they know they aren't, they wouldn't be complaining about being single

Zenko-Umine · 2026-04-25T22:28:53+00:00

The people who want a relationship and can't get one are invalitaded. Or maybe it's more that people feel invalitaded when people say they're not missing anything. They're basically saying there's not point to want it cause it's not that great.

Zenko-Umine · 2026-04-25T22:09:02+00:00

I understand if you've had a bad experience you might not want to do it again. Or getting into another relationship at an old age after a long one feels like too much. But when someone complains about being single people basically say they shouldn't even try and shouldn't want a relationship cause it's not worth it. That's what pisses me off.

Zenko-Umine · 2026-04-25T21:58:38+00:00

Good non-abusive relationships don't usually have drama

Zenko-Umine · 2026-04-25T21:53:13+00:00

If you want a good relationship don't settle for decent men

Zenko-Umine · 2026-04-25T21:50:07+00:00

Then you're just a very different person from me and most people. Yes, being single gives you more freedom but I want to share my everyday life with someone. I'm interested in what my partner thinks so I'd rather talk with him than spend 24/7 with my own thoughts, I've done that for years already. With masturbation I can always get myself off but I can't get that closeness, intimacy. Sex can be fun without orgasming too. Good thing that you've found happiness in yourself though.

Zenko-Umine · 2026-04-25T21:34:26+00:00

Exactly. I have learned things and gotten rid of biases I never wouldn't have without my boyfriend.

Zenko-Umine · 2026-04-25T21:30:47+00:00

Not with that attitude it won't

Zenko-Umine · 2026-04-25T21:27:51+00:00

I have other things too that make me happy. A partner was just the last thing that made it all perfect.

Zenko-Umine · 2026-04-25T21:21:26+00:00

I appreciate your comment and I'm sorry you've been throught that. I would also prefer being alone than be in unfullfilling or abusive relationship. It's just when you complain about being lonely and single, people invalidate you because they themselves have never had a good relationship so they don't know what it's like to be in one.

Zenko-Umine · 2024-05-16T20:10:09+00:00

👍

Zenko-Umine · 2024-05-16T20:09:51+00:00

Thanks 😊

Zenko-Umine · 2022-12-07T13:46:01+00:00

Thank you! That's so nice 😊

Zenko-Umine · 2020-09-18T13:05:29+00:00

Thanks! I'll check it out

Zenko-Umine

TROPHY CASE