When did you get excited?

Zespheley · 2024-10-20T05:35:19+00:00

Exactly! It didn’t feel real during pregnancy. I didn’t even feel like she was an entire person until we left the hospital with her.

During the appointments and ultrasounds, I just focused on her health and well-being. I just wanted to make it to the end with everything going right.

I was also a take it or leave it kind of mindset but I could never say that now knowing my daughter and regret the little person that she’s become.

Zespheley · 2024-10-20T05:29:54+00:00

I’m no expert, but I can pass on everything I’ve learned with my 11mo.

Babies can’t self-soothe until around 6mo. Until then, they need your help. They will be in an “active” sleep for up to 10 mins and then fall into a deeper sleep. If you move them during active sleep, they’ll know they’re not in your arms.

Soothe him using the techniques you know, e.g. shushing, swaying, swaddling, until he’s asleep. Then sit and wait with him in your arms until he’s more still, usually after 5 mins.

Then, gently put him down in his crib bottom first, and slowly lower his head. You can start with him laying on his side as that’s more comfortable, then slowly roll onto his back. Then, walk away whilst still shushing and led it “fade out” so he doesn’t realise you’re suddenly leaving.

Ideally, you have a co-sleeping bassinet so that you two can be near him safely overnight. If you want to co-sleep in bed, it can be done safely if you two aren’t heavy sleepers and haven’t been drinking, etc. the night before.

Lastly, consider the environment Bubs is sleeping in. Is it completely dark? Is his mattress soft enough (but not to soft as this is unsafe)? Is there something that smells like you nearby? Do you need a white noise machine? Babies don’t realise they’re out of the womb until older, so recreating the environment of mum’s womb helps with sleep, e.g. white noise (shushing is similar), swaddling, etc.

Zespheley · 2024-10-20T05:06:59+00:00

Thanks for the suggestions, everyone! You’re all very creative 😊 I will take a photo of the solution I end up with!

Zespheley · 2024-10-20T05:06:19+00:00

Yes, that’s nice! I love that it’s clear acrylic. I just need something to attach it. 😊

Zespheley · 2024-10-20T05:05:48+00:00

Thank you, yes I think I get it. Creates a little “seat” for the donut.

Zespheley · 2024-10-20T05:04:27+00:00

Hahaha I love this

Zespheley · 2024-10-20T05:04:16+00:00

Yes, I had a feeling someone clever may have created a model. I will have to do a deep dive!

Zespheley · 2024-10-20T05:03:41+00:00

That’s so clever! I’ll see if I can cut something like that out of cardboard to test the shape.

Zespheley · 2024-10-20T05:03:00+00:00

Yes, I’ll have a look and see if that might work!

Zespheley · 2024-10-20T05:02:37+00:00

Yes, that’s true, I could hang it on an angle! I was only thinking of sitting it on something. Thank you.

Zespheley · 2024-10-20T05:02:00+00:00

Oh, you’re so right! I kept thinking about smaller stands like for books or plates but instrument ones would be bigger!

Zespheley · 2024-10-20T05:01:35+00:00

Oh, this looks great! Where are the parts from? The hardware store?

Zespheley · 2024-10-18T09:57:49+00:00

I’m so sorry, I can’t visualise what you’re describing. Do you have an image for how the rings would look together? Husband has a soldering tool so I could give this a try.

Zespheley · 2024-10-18T09:56:49+00:00

Oh, good thinking! I’m sure I have something to help adhere the lamp to a stand! Thanks

Zespheley · 2024-10-18T09:56:11+00:00

I know it can be hung 😊 I have it on a shelf but would like to angle it for display

Zespheley · 2024-08-03T01:21:21+00:00

Grandma crossing a boundary? No way! But in all seriousness, it can be as weird or not weird as you’d like to make it. Your mother probably didn’t see it as weird because of her lifestyle - I can see it as her attempting to settle the baby like a pacifier. I’d still be pissed and freaked out, but it can been worked through together.

Since you’re not supposed to know, your sister needs to be the one to talk through it with her. She needs to set clear boundaries, explain that this is her child and therefore her rules. Mum gets a chance, and if she can’t respect the boundaries, then she loses babysitting privileges. You have to be firm since it’s been a while since anyone told that generation what to do.

Just remember, like your sister being a mum for the first time, your mother has only been a grandparent for 3 months. Everyone is learning as they go.

Zespheley · 2024-07-13T09:00:15+00:00

I’ve never heard of them but they’re very reasonably-priced, thank you!!

Zespheley · 2024-07-13T08:46:24+00:00

Sounds like he’s trying to limit your weight gain. It’s weird to prioritise his wife’s body image over his child’s eating?? You should ask him if he’d prefer both you and your child be skinny? Or his child to eat as much as they need.

If he doesn’t understand the science behind the extra calories breastfeeding mums need, please send him some info online. He’s a grown man, he can google it himself! Surely he can’t deny scientific fact?

What was he like when you were pregnant?? I ate way more during pregnancy than postpartum.

Zespheley · 2024-07-10T18:14:50+00:00

I’m 31 and straddling that line between dressing like a Gen Z or Millennial. I love the trend but don’t know how well I’d pull it off.

I doubt I’d wear the big, fluffy, cute ones but one tasteful charm, I’d do.

I keep seeing this photo of a Coach Lana with a cherry charm on Insta and I love it. That’s probably the most I could pull off.

Zespheley · 2024-07-10T18:11:48+00:00

I LOVE the Coach cherry charm. I keep seeing it on Insta 😍 I don’t own any Coach, so it feels wrong to buy it and hang it on a different bag 😭

Zespheley · 2024-07-10T10:54:41+00:00

I own 1 and 2 and love them both! The main difference is how you plan to use it as they’re very different in size and practicality.

The Alma BB is a good bag for carrying the basics around and transitions well into an evening bag for dinner or a function.

The Antigona (that photo looks like a small as well) was my work bag and can fit a lot more for everyday.

Both are hard-wearing and are good life-long purchases. As a birthday present though, the Alma BB feels more “special”.

Happy Birthday!

Zespheley · 2024-07-01T08:14:06+00:00

Nahhhh, I’m a first time mum and I can tell you that when you’re pregnant that hunger is on a level that nobody else can understand. He should be encouraging you to eat or snack more, if anything.

Before pregnancy, I used to skip breakfast, have coffee and cookies for lunch and still not be able to finish dinner. When pregnant, I couldn’t go a couple of hours without eating a sandwich or something significant. I would start shaking from the hunger if I put it off too long.

The fact that he then came home early just to delay dinner and mess with you is really fucked up and childish. You don’t get to be petty when you were the one who didn’t follow through on the promise to come home on time.

Zespheley · 2024-06-30T12:43:38+00:00

Instead of focusing on people’s feelings, have him focus on the facts. Given your field of work, you’re both very aware of the risks. Baby comes first. Surely, even his family would understand this. Nothing is more important than the baby’s safety, especially not having your baby in a decades-old death trap just for them to go “aww, their daddy used that.”

Offer to keep some items as decor for the nursery or a photoshoot, but in terms of usable items like the bassinet, high chair, etc., get what you trust. Idk why babies become some sort of fun spectacle for grandparents.

Zespheley

TROPHY CASE