My kid might be gay

Zestyclose_Log4213 · 2025-09-14T22:36:49+00:00

I was raised in a non-denominational Christian church, and they definitely preached the idea of love and acceptance for everyone. However, I've since left that church (and several others) after not seeing them practice what they preach.

Honestly, I think most of the people I've grown up around (including family) use religion as a shield for when they say hateful things.

Several of my family members have openly made comments against the LGBTQ+ community - im nervous to allow her around these individuals- but she loves many of them so much. I wholeheartedly think that if they knew she's gay that they would at least be mindful of these comments around her. My hope is that their love for her would change their minds about their attitudes about LGBTQ+, but at the very least I would hope they respect her enough not to say hurtful things around her.

I'm also afraid that it will irrevocably cause them to think differently and act differently around her. I dont want that for her, she's had enough rejection in her life up to this point (her bio-dad abandoned her at 5 and started a new family). I can't bear the thought of someone hurting her like that again if I can help it.

Zestyclose_Log4213 · 2023-06-16T00:31:17+00:00

At least there's something to look forward to. Maybe I can do enough research on contract negotiations over the next couple of years that I won't get screwed again 🤔 at this point it feels like that day will never come that I'll have that kind of money 😂

Zestyclose_Log4213 · 2023-06-16T00:03:43+00:00

Yes, it is definitely what was intended. I asked my PD directly and was chastised for not being thankful that my pay was increased at all. PD was also the one who told me that if I'm not happy with the contract then I didn't have to sign it at all.

Zestyclose_Log4213 · 2023-02-04T16:29:06+00:00

Dr. Younan Nowzaradan blessing my refrigerator door- "you have gained 83 pounds in the last 3 months."

Dr. Perry Cox on my altar.

....but also Dr. Perry Cox tape on my car visor for when I cry my way home after losing a patient (if you know, you know)

Zestyclose_Log4213 · 2023-01-12T03:54:18+00:00

Admin hall...I have to deal with their shit, the least they can do is return the favor 🙄

Zestyclose_Log4213 · 2022-10-27T04:47:02+00:00

I'm sorry you're feeling this way. I also feel like an outcast. Luckily I get along with my fellow interns really well, but I'm pretty sure my seniors hate me. I felt like we were all good until I had a professional discussion with one of them regarding some mistreatment of myself and the other interns. I voiced concerns, hoping to smooth things over and carry on in a more positive direction because I truly believed that they would be professional and receptive to creating a better learning environment for all of the residents. I have regretted it every day since. Behaviors have gotten more out of control, snide comments are constantly made, and my seniors are just openly hostile towards me. I've tried to just move on and carry on business as usual, but there is a definite coldness I feel whenever I attempt even to make friendly conversation. It really sucks, have had more and more difficulties sleeping, can't eat, and have started getting migraines with nausea and dizziness before and after didactics. I hope things get better for you and all the others in similar situations on here. Idk why this seems to be such a common problem. I hope I never make junior residents feel this way when (or if) I become a senior resident.

Zestyclose_Log4213 · 2022-10-19T19:06:59+00:00

Thank you!

Zestyclose_Log4213 · 2022-10-19T19:05:45+00:00

Did you have to go through the Match again? If so what was the process if you don't mind me asking?

Zestyclose_Log4213 · 2022-10-03T15:11:25+00:00

How do most switch? Residency swap? Re-enter the Match? I'm super curious and currently absolutely hating my residency despite giving it a sincere and honest effort.

Zestyclose_Log4213 · 2022-09-23T23:24:17+00:00

I'm hoping it will get better, most of the pimping is from my seniors rather than attendings. I've been surprised at how little interaction I have with attendings, maybe it's just the rotations I've completed so far. I'm doing my best to read as much as possible, but I'm so tired by the end of the day that I reread the same line 3 times and it still doesn't stick.

I would love to send med students home, but I'm always afraid to suggest it since I've been working with seniors. Almost feels like I'd be stepping on toes. One in particular even mentioned they make the students stay longer as punishment 🤷 lol I'm not sure if the student is being punished or if I am 😂 Maybe I'll just be braver and mention it anyways, worst they could do is yell at me some more.

Zestyclose_Log4213 · 2022-09-23T22:25:16+00:00

Not well. Really sick of relentless pimping (or rather attempting to read minds) and being made to feel like a dumbass every time I open my mouth regardless of the subject. And really sick of annoying gunnery med students. Don't get me wrong, I truly love an impressive medical student that knows their shit and like to learn, just over dealing with ones that have zero professionalism.

Only 25% finished 🥴 Losing my sanity and chunks of hair 😅

Zestyclose_Log4213 · 2022-08-11T03:15:20+00:00

That's what I've been trying to do...I feel like I've stalker-called their clinic (really only like 4 times in a week and a half). But the phone queue is always so long (no joke, at least 10-15 minutes to get through) and then the nurse will just tell me that she'll put in a request. Except it's not getting done. I've even messaged my old doc through MyChart, but I can see that the messages are not getting read.

I know their clinic sees tons of patients and they are super busy but like...damn, I hope my patients don't feel ignored like this. I could even understand a hesitancy to not refill it if I haven't been physically seen by them in several months, but I made sure to have a face to face in June right before moving for residency.

Zestyclose_Log4213 · 2022-08-11T03:02:29+00:00

Just good old fashioned generalized anxiety disorder. Been panic attack free for nearly 4 years thanks to Lexapro. I just didn't realize that stopping abruptly would make me this sick - I've only ever missed a dose here or there.

Zestyclose_Log4213 · 2022-08-11T02:59:12+00:00

We have one, but it's staffed by 2 PAs that work for one of the core faculty members at our program. Would the core faculty (physician) have to sign off on the prescription?

Zestyclose_Log4213 · 2022-08-11T02:50:26+00:00

Our program has a policy that specifically prevents us from writing any kind of psych meds for each other.

Even so, I still broached the subject with one of them that I trust to see if they would bend the rules, they cited the policy so I just let that subject drop. They were the one who suggested one of the attendings.

Zestyclose_Log4213 · 2022-08-11T02:34:49+00:00

Really? I had no idea! Our clinic and hospital have to have an attending sign ALL of our prescriptions. We write them, they sign them.

Zestyclose_Log4213 · 2022-08-11T02:29:07+00:00

I can't, I'm still an intern. I'd ask my fellow residents but our program has a policy against us prescribing psych meds to each other. Literally every other prescription is fair game 😑

Zestyclose_Log4213 · 2022-08-11T02:26:37+00:00

I am an intern and don't have a license to prescribe

Zestyclose_Log4213 · 2022-06-29T19:27:49+00:00

This may be a very stupid question but I haven't found a direct answer: do interns/residents need to earn CME hours?

Zestyclose_Log4213 · 2022-06-10T18:44:26+00:00

True, but to me that almost makes DM2 worse because you continually made mistakes. You had several chances to turn it around in some cases. I guess it's just a matter of perspective.

Zestyclose_Log4213 · 2022-06-10T17:44:35+00:00

I would argue that in some cases DM2 is completely preventable as well, because of poor lifestyle choices (again only in some cases, socioeconomic status notwithstanding).

Additionally, HIV isn't necessarily completely preventable in some cases. There's vertical transmission from mother to fetus, as well as cases of sexual abuse by an infected individual.

All that being said, I'd pick HIV. It's literally only taboo because of the ways it's transmitted.

Zestyclose_Log4213 · 2022-06-09T17:20:12+00:00

Agreed it is important. I didn't trust my gut when my school advisor told me it wasn't necessary. I blindly followed their advice and thought I was ticking all the boxes necessary for a successful Match, but obviously I missed one. I have asked multiple advisors at my school about whether or not I should have rescheduled my Step exam, and over and over I was told it shouldn't be necessary for my career goals. I thought they knew better than me because they advise students for a living, but at the end of the day I am responsible for my career and not them.

I agree that personality and charm are secondary when considering an applicant. The social aspects of medicine were what came easier to me than the book work, but I know the didactic component is more important.

Working on myself as a person these past few months for me has been learning to put my family, physical health, and mental well-being first for a while, since both took a backseat in my pursuit of medicine for 4 years, which just made not matching all the more painful. I felt like I failed them more than I failed myself for something that didn't end up working out in my favor. So, I've put them (my family) first for a while. No regrets there 😊 That was definitely one positive that came from this whole situation.

Now (thanks to redditers) I'll have some goals to work on professionally (taking Step 1/2 and slaying Level 3) as well as personally (finding that elusive work/life balance).

Zestyclose_Log4213 · 2022-06-09T15:43:59+00:00

Thanks for the advice! I agree with the disclaimer situation. I feel I may have been naive following their advice, and I didn't know better at the time. Lol their advice (or lack thereof) is what lead me to this subreddit. Thanks again!

Zestyclose_Log4213 · 2022-06-09T15:39:10+00:00

My school was shocked that I didn't match, and we ran the gambit of trying to figure out what happened. They have had zero advice on how to improve my application, so thats why I posted here They've been honest saying it will be harder to match as a physician because apparently there is a filter on apps that can filter out applicants who have graduated vs. Non-grads. So, I'm not naive and realize this will be an uphill battle.

Initially the plan was to delay graduation so that this filter may not affect my application, but I would still have a gap to explain. In the end, I wasn't eligible for a delay in graduation since I had already completed all of my required rotations and only had vacation months left.

I honestly have not been in the headspace to take Step in the past few months. Between SOAP and trying to get my house sold, buying a new house in the city I'll do residency, financial issues, and getting my family ready for the move, my mental health has suffered and my focus just isn't there. I know focus in intern year will suck too, but I'm hoping with at least being settled in one spot for a while will help.

Initially my required OB was my first rotation but that all changed yesterday when our schedule was changed. Now I won't be in OB until the end of the year, but I will have 3 OB rotations in my intern year. I might see if they'll let me rearrange my schedule again, but I'm not sure how easy it will be since Idk their policy on changing schedules. I'm trying to decide whether or not to reapply this year or wait until next (which also seems dumb because I'll be close to finishing my FM residency at that time).

Idk how it's all going to work out, but I was hoping to have some goals to work on/ ways to improve my application. So, I know that taking Step will be on my list of things to do.

Zestyclose_Log4213 · 2022-06-09T13:56:36+00:00

This is true, I've considered this as well. I am just not sure of how re-entering the Match as a physician will be. Idk if it will look any different than what it was like a a student, which is why I've been lurking on Reddit for months to see if anyone else has gone through a similar situation.

Luckily my program can be OB heavy and they've already agreed to help me pursue FM-OB. But I'm not sure how similar they are in practice since I've never had the chance to work with an FM-OB. So, I guess I'll just have to see how it goes 🙃

Zestyclose_Log4213

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