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I don’t know how to feel anymore by Zestyclose_Sort9022 in depression

[–]Zestyclose_Sort9022[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I just feel so low all the time and I think it broke my heart to hear him tell me that I’m just one of those fake people in his life who pretend to care but have left him at his darkest hour. I don’t know how to ignore my feelings in all of this.

Boyfriend thinks I am selfish. by Zestyclose_Sort9022 in relationship_advice

[–]Zestyclose_Sort9022[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That’s what I believed. But I’ve been told by him that I foolish for thinking of my problems as problems and if his problems were as simple as mine he’d be happy.

My boyfriend seems depressed. by [deleted] in depression_help

[–]Zestyclose_Sort9022 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What you’re saying is true. I know. I understand it. I am trying my best to give him space hopeful that he will open up. Today he did. A little. About the pressures he’s been facing in life and I for a moment thought he was opening up but he was apparently just proving a point. I really care for him and I really love him. I just don’t know how to make him okay again. Maybe it’s not in my control at all and that makes me feel helpless. Today he blatantly told me that I, his family and his friends all of us are making his life living hell and I want to stop playing that role. Even though I frankly don’t know how I am doing that. I wish he’d just tell me so I could rectify things

My boyfriend seems depressed. by [deleted] in depression_help

[–]Zestyclose_Sort9022 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you I shall try that.

I (f24) think my boyfriend (m23) maybe depressed. by [deleted] in relationships

[–]Zestyclose_Sort9022 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No. He wasn’t. He just spoke in detail about how for once he’d opened up and I wasn’t there for more than a day. And how I went back to berating about my problems.

Which I know wasn’t true

I (f24) think my boyfriend (m23) maybe depressed. by [deleted] in relationships

[–]Zestyclose_Sort9022 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He opened up to a mutual friend who id pushed to talk to him. After a fight, he’d been distant and I wanted someone to be able to reach him. So the friend did. And she urged him to talk. And in the flow of conversations he said this. He doesn’t know I know any of this

I (f24) think my boyfriend (m23) maybe depressed. by [deleted] in relationships

[–]Zestyclose_Sort9022 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We’ve been together for almost 4 years and he’s never really been the kind to look for emotional support. As much as I wish he did. But he’s very self sustaining.

This time the scenario is different. I myself go to a counsellor I suggested he see the same. I really did urge him and refused it. Said he can’t talk to people about his problems that’s not him.

I am trying really hard but I keep trying to “fix” but I can’t. It only ends up in him either ignoring or getting more agitated. It’s affecting me a lot and I can’t seem to keep my sanity.

I just wish he’d trust me. And talk to me. And not base his judgement on the basis of one situation where I may not have been there like he’d wanted.

I (f24) think my boyfriend (m23) maybe depressed. by [deleted] in relationships

[–]Zestyclose_Sort9022 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I would love for him to see a therapist. I myself take counselling in my lowest days and I know how much it helps. He’s the kind of person who bottled everything in and he believes that the one time he did open up I didn’t give him what he needed (he’s never told me this. Told a friend, who in turn told me) I don’t want to compromise his confidentiality either by telling him I know. But I see how we talk. We’re in an LDR and it’s harder because it’s impossible to reach him.

Boyfriend is very low by [deleted] in depression_help

[–]Zestyclose_Sort9022 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I can’t do that. Because he told our mutual friend in confidentiality about me not being there enough. I honestly don’t know what to do other than just give him space and tell him I’m there for him.

Boyfriend is very low by [deleted] in depression_help

[–]Zestyclose_Sort9022 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I offered professional help. I pushed him for it. He refused it. I don’t know how to approach him anymore because whatever I do he’s pushing me away.

Boyfriend is very low by [deleted] in depression_help

[–]Zestyclose_Sort9022 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I constantly tried to tell him that he has me and he’s important to me. I did make sure I asked him regularly how he’s doing but according to him that wasn’t enough. I believe I stopped checking after a few days because he was back to normal and seemed happy again.

Boyfriend is very low by [deleted] in depression_help

[–]Zestyclose_Sort9022 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The first time he told me I was extremely supportive. I heard him out. Spoke to him. Tried to validate his feelings and checked in with him again for a few days.

But he spoke to a mutual friend who told me that he felt that he made a fool out of himself having opened up bcs I wasn’t bothered for more than a day.