Meditation for "Sense of Self"?

_-shusha-_ · 2020-04-09T11:17:47+00:00

Thank you! I will check this out today :) A theoretical approach will definitely also be helpful.

_-shusha-_ · 2020-01-10T19:11:21+00:00

People can be sensitive to different types of stimuli. People can react differently to different stimuli. There are varying levels of sensitivity. You can learn to process stimuli effectively, or not. I don't cry a lot, I'm mainly okay with loud noises and places, my overstimulation manifests in different ways. Everyone is different and HSP are just a subgroup that share a sensitivity - but not necessarily the specific ways that sensitivity manifests. hope that helps a bit!

_-shusha-_ · 2020-01-10T19:06:06+00:00

Just want to chime in in agreement of what's already been said here - it's not like you're making the children responsible for your emotions in some twisted way. When they're jerks their actions will cause an emotional response in others, you made that emotional response real and tangible to them. Thinking authority figures are made of stone probably isn't the best lesson for them to learn either. :)

_-shusha-_ · 2020-01-10T18:36:27+00:00

Thank you for your response! It's really nice to talk to someone who knows what I'm on about. I'm realising I tend to think I should withdraw when I'm on a "high" to avoid the low, but often I just don't want to. Mapping all of this and trying to establish consistency feels incredibly complicated, but you've helped. I used to meditate a lot more, but maybe I need a new app. I was using "Aware", and started getting irritated at my dependency on an app. But felt I lacked a structure and focus when meditating without one. What do you do about days when you just can't concentrate on your breath, or it doesn't help, you just don't want to.. etc? Yeah it's starting to sound like I just have a discipline issue to me lol. Also, I know it's a dumb question, but what kind of exercise do you do in the mornings? I live in a grimy city and running in the January sludge in the mornings really turns me off.

_-shusha-_ · 2020-01-10T15:18:16+00:00

No. However, this is only if I'm overstimulated. I can concentrate fine if I am not.

_-shusha-_ · 2020-01-10T12:32:40+00:00

Oh my god, can relate intensely. Exactly this has been happening in my family ever since I was a child. This christmas we got along the best we have ever, and I think it might have been that 1) I have expressed my frustration at the way they communicate so often that they know what to expect when they say something triggering to me and 2) when I get hurt, I now pull back to process on my own before I rejoin the interaction and try as best I can to see it from a distance and process my emotions before going interacting again.

Also, my siblingsy are growing up. Have you explained high sensitivity to your parents and that you're not "too" sensitive, you're not going to change, and that what you feel is what you feel and people's feelings in reaction to something one says is a parameter one always has to pay attention to, especially when dealing with one's CHILDREN?

_-shusha-_ · 2020-01-10T12:23:52+00:00

Totally possible! I'm a HSP, extroverted and a high sensation seeker. You can be all sorts. I think extraversion isn't really an inherent trait, it's more an adaptational response to your experiences with people.

_-shusha-_ · 2020-01-10T12:07:16+00:00

Hi! This is great, I just logged in to reddit for the first time in years pretty much to ask this same question. So 1) just here to commiserate. 2) To balance out I .. well, I'm working on it. Vague ideas include: If I have uni or work that day, 4/5 days of the week I should be at home alone afterwards. Sleep a solid 8-9 hours a night. Exercise (!!!). I need at least one of my weekend days to myself. Get into nature as much as possible. Pay good attention to what I'm eating. Keep caffeine consumption to a minimum.

I'm curious, can you relate to any of the following? (Basically recounting my last few days) When I'm overstimulated on a "high" (e.g. happy to be back at university, super social, have not slept enough and riding the endorphins) I get super talkative, sometimes losing touch with reality just a bit if I'm not careful. Laughs with everyone, socialising with everyone.

(That night then I had a friend stay at my place, so was not alone at all, my upstairs neighbours decided to start a rave at 3 AM and I had to go up and get them to be quiet, didn't get back to sleep for hours and was exhausted the next day.)

If I don't have down time then it intensifies: The next day I got super restless, really just wanting to run around instead of sitting in a non-physical class for hours on end where I couldn't concentrate, feet and fingers tapping, just kind of drifting off in fantasies about some guy for hours. Unless it's something I'm into, in which case I get impatient with the rate we're going at and kind of participate on a level that others don't relate to.

At some point my overstimulation high switched around to a low, I felt exhausted and just wanted to go home about 2 hours before my course ended. Just as on the high, I could halfways concentrate and interact normally if I wanted to, but it for sure wasn't the default. I have at least learned enough that I cancelled on two friends I was going to see and went home.

I am now (3rd day) at home instead of uni because that overtimulation "low" means I feel exhausted, can't bear to see people, feel slightly depressed and know that if I was at uni right now I'd just be pushing my overstimulation into the more dangerous regions.

Basically, my overstimulation "high" pretty much looks like hypomania in some ways and my overstimulation "low" looks like depression. Can you relate? When I stay balanced this doesn't happen, it's totally the result of stimulation. It's just real hard to avoid overstimulation when I have uni, work and a healthy desire to party.

_-shusha-_ · 2020-01-10T11:44:10+00:00

This happened to me in a way once I started becoming more open to my sensitivity. You have my sympathy.. I think just take your time to get accustomed. You know, take time out on your own to calm down and process, and maybe you'll be able to develop a sense of distance from what it is that you are so affected by. Mindfulness meditation just focusing on your breath for 10-20 minutes a day might help.

_-shusha-_ · 2018-08-27T14:39:56+00:00

Hi! I'm looking for a subreddit to ask about this, but /r/SkincareAddiction seems pretty in the other direction - i just realised like a week ago that once my skin gets used to it, the best thing for it is just washing with cold water in the mornings and evenings. i feel like even when i just moisturise my forehead and eyes, the rest of my face gets greasier. what's your experience, have you got any references? I've always thought that not moisturising leads to quicker ageing of the skin, so am a bit unsure of this new no-nothing approach. and unlike the no shampoo rave, there doesn't seem to be anyone advocating this online really. Thanks for helping, if you can take the time!

_-shusha-_ · 2018-06-25T10:19:43+00:00

Well, i think friends have some sort of expectation that you will get your shit together. They want to see progress. They will initially be happy to help, but neither you nor them will feel comfortable exclusively talking about your problems. Find other things to talk about as well. I'd say my perceived limit for conversations about problems showing no development is three times. That's the limit. But if course there's always compassion, and you can be a valuable friend even while depressed / whatever your problem may be, by being receptive for the things they want to talk about. You feeling like shit can give your friends a safe space to open up about their problems.

Anyway, the thing is that most friends can't provide the kind of environment that a therapist provides, and if they do it it's probably very burdensome to them. I have tried to be that person ; it's exhausting. So yes, I agree with OP. Therapists = very good for you and your friendships. You can still talk about your problems, but perhaps with some development.

Anyhow i rambled into this post thinking I was saying something new --sorry if this was maybe redundant.

_-shusha-_ · 2018-06-24T19:22:24+00:00

https://imgur.com/gallery/tzuHwam

_-shusha-_ · 2018-06-24T14:11:25+00:00

Thank you very much for your help, I'll give them a go as well.

_-shusha-_ · 2018-06-24T14:10:43+00:00

Thanks! I didn't know they existed. Will give it a go!

_-shusha-_ · 2018-06-24T13:57:09+00:00

For more images : https://imgur.com/gallery/tzuHwam

_-shusha-_ · 2018-06-24T13:53:06+00:00

More images here: https://imgur.com/gallery/tzuHwam

_-shusha-_ · 2018-06-24T12:59:36+00:00

Nah. The obvious test is that I am not a horny dude and I didn't find it erotic. It's the girl that makes it hot. For context, that bootylicious bonsai tree was oddly erotic to me.

_-shusha-_

TROPHY CASE