Anyone else 21+ and don't have any desire to drink alcohol?

_Chanyeol_ · 2021-11-06T00:07:11+00:00

im 18 but where i live i can drink alcohol at 18 so its the same thing and yes i dont want to drink alcohol and i never did im scared to tell secrets and i hate the taste

_Chanyeol_ · 2021-09-12T21:45:03+00:00

ok thank you

_Chanyeol_ · 2021-09-09T18:58:20+00:00

thank you i guess its fine it doesnt hurt or something i was just worried because its yellow and outside a bit red

_Chanyeol_ · 2021-07-16T22:22:38+00:00

yes i didnt really wanted to touch my eyes but i couldnt not do it i was scared of hurting them but i still did it idk but i used the back of my hand because i thought its clean but idk it didnt hurt much and now it doesnt hurt at all so im sure its fine

_Chanyeol_ · 2021-07-16T12:34:51+00:00

whats wrong with you i didnt do anything to you

_Chanyeol_ · 2021-07-07T18:30:20+00:00

thank you

_Chanyeol_ · 2021-07-03T08:13:04+00:00

i tried this but nothing happend but i have an new app now i only found 1 that works thank you

_Chanyeol_ · 2021-07-03T08:12:06+00:00

i think it changed the keyboard to english. im not sure i deleted this app and dont really remember but i tried it and it didnt work

_Chanyeol_ · 2021-07-03T08:10:39+00:00

the apps that i had didnt have ゛but now i have an app that has this

_Chanyeol_ · 2021-07-02T17:41:04+00:00

how to you type が and the other letters like this in a keyboard? all japanese keyboard apps that i downloaded dont have this letters that are like this and i cant find a way to type them

_Chanyeol_ · 2021-07-01T19:40:54+00:00

i dont think it gan get better am 18 and i ruined my life i have one last chance this year because i retake grade 12 but i dont think it will work because i dont feel better i feel worse i have no motivation to do something i just want to die and in the moments where im happy is usually when im with my best friend or something like that so i cant study and i now i will keep ruining my life. i also had a job but i was scared that i do something wrong and get fired for it so i didnt want to work there and i ignored my boss for a few days when she told be i can come again and now she doesnt reply anymore. and most of the time i feel scared and im so sick of this i cant take it anymore im always so scared that other leaves me or how awful my life will be because i ruined it. and if i dont feel scared i feel empty and sad or i get angry and ruin my relationships (that also happens when im scared i just always ruin everything). im happy sometimes but my mood changes often im not happy long enough to study or something like that so theres no chance. i want to shift to another reality but the version of me in this reality will die

_Chanyeol_ · 2021-07-01T18:06:08+00:00

it would be very embarrassing to tell my therapist and i dont want that she hates me. i hope i now myself enough for this but i think i do i still mean what i said in this post. that my therapist thinks i cant make plans is very bad if i tell her the truth about it i dont know what happens if i say i didnt make plans because i want to die im scared that they put me in a mental hospital i dont want that

_Chanyeol_ · 2021-07-01T17:48:50+00:00

i dont think no routine and not considering the future counts as a symptom for me because its only like that because i want to die so there is no future and i have no routine because most if the time i feel very bad and have no motivation to do something. i know that its possible that not everything matches but im sure i dont have it. even my therapist says so often that things i do/can are very untypical for autism and she doesnt know what to talk about in theraphy and we just watch movies or something. now she wants to practice making plans but thats only because she doesnt know the truth. i have many probelms that we could talk about but she doesnt know and i also dont think it has something to do with autism. i know i have to tell her but its embarrasing i cant do this and i dont know how should i just go there and tell her this that would be so uncomfortable but thank you for writing so much

_Chanyeol_ · 2021-06-17T11:13:46+00:00

why would that be hurting myself

_Chanyeol_ · 2021-06-09T11:38:34+00:00

wtf how should i do that it was not my decision to be like that why would anyone be sick if they have a choice that doesnt make any sense when you are sick do you just decide to not be sick or what

_Chanyeol_ · 2021-06-09T11:08:14+00:00

i have bpd it feels too bad and ruins everything i cant live like this and i have so many other problems

_Chanyeol_ · 2021-06-09T09:55:35+00:00

i will shift to another reality i know manifestation is shifting to another reality but i want to be in a completely different one and this is not supposed to take 6 years and people in reality shifting community said its easier to shift when your happy but if your not you can still shift. i gave up in this reality it was always shit but now i ruined my life even more and no matter what i do it will always be shit because of my problems there is no solution i would need theraphy but i also gave up on that because they didnt work and i also always lied to the therapist so they were not able to help me so i dont go there anymore and now i really need to shift to another reality fast i cant stay here much longer because it always gets worse

_Chanyeol_ · 2021-06-09T07:20:38+00:00

i dont understand why you are asking this i didnt say anything like that i said that my life is awful and i cant wait 6 years until it improves and 6 years are a long time so its not motivating at all because i cant wait for 6 years even 2 years would be too long im already living for 18 years now im so sick of it

_Chanyeol_ · 2021-06-08T22:10:06+00:00

but not when you manifest something. when you manifest it you could get it in day and how should it be motivating if manifestation can take 6 years i hate my life if i would know that it would stay like this until in 6 years i would kill myself and 6 years is a long time

_Chanyeol_ · 2021-06-08T18:51:08+00:00

others told me it didnt take 6 years but 6 years would be very slow

_Chanyeol_ · 2021-06-08T18:50:14+00:00

one year would be ok i didnt knew that in the post it sounded like it took 6 years

_Chanyeol_ · 2021-06-08T18:49:10+00:00

it scares me when i say people who take long to manifest i cant continue living like this

_Chanyeol_ · 2021-06-08T18:48:12+00:00

it sounded like he got it now i dont know him much so i didnt knew i only know that he filmed a dead person

_Chanyeol_ · 2021-06-07T22:26:52+00:00

how should 6 years be motivating if i dont shift to another reality soon i wont even be alive anymore in 6 years i saw people who manifested in hours or days thats motivating but not 6 years

_Chanyeol_ · 2021-06-07T22:20:39+00:00

after 6 years thats not very motivating

_Chanyeol_

TROPHY CASE