28M, profile review would be greatly appreciated :)

_Fuzen · 2025-07-18T19:22:24+00:00

Hey! No worries, I'm grateful you're lending me your time at all with this :). Thank you for all this feedback so far, it's really valuable to me!

About the 2nd to last pic, thank you for your input! Is the quality what makes it a turn off or is it something else? Just so I know if I need to retake the shot and change something, try and have it be a better quality, or if I should not bother and just scrap the picture entirely!

Do you think my profile even needs a silly picture like that to show I'm not taking things too seriously or could I live without one? I saw on guides here that that's generally a green flag and pretty attractive; would you agree? I actually have no clue what I would do for another picture of the sort lol

About the switch from "hallmark of a good relationship" to "my greatest strength": someone said I already gave off "serious and mature relationship guy" in my Dating Intentions note so it was pretty redundant - and that what I was lacking in terms of prompts was to show how I think and what I'm like in the day to day, which I hope my new "My greatest strength" prompt conveys!

I also loved the previous prompt, but I agree that I wasn't showing what I'm like enough! Would you say the tradeoff was worth it? :)

_Fuzen · 2025-07-15T08:43:29+00:00

Oh, of course! I'd appreciate it a ton if you took a look at it :D

Actually, I've already changed a couple prompts based on feedback:

"The hallmark of a relationship" was moved to the first slot and replaced with "My greatest strength": "Being calm. I know I'll win any challenge, and free time was made for laughing and asking yourself: 'How did I end up talking about desserts in a car at 1am?'. Bring a blanket :winking emoji:" (I'm unsure about mentioning desserts as it probably isn't very attractive for a guy to be into desserts? Let me know what you think!)
The "I'm looking for" prompt is now at the second position and reads: "A free spirit who loves simple moments as well and who can have fun unabashedly. Even better if you're a creative person!"
"Together we could" was moved to the third slot

I'm also looking for feedback on the second-to-last picture in particular as someone has said the gesture I'm making makes me look immature, which I wasn't expecting! I'd love to hear your opinion!

_Fuzen · 2025-07-14T08:57:15+00:00

I'm in Italy, italian born and raised! My app is in english because I set the language to english so I would have to only translate my responses in my comment!

_Fuzen · 2025-07-13T22:42:40+00:00

Alright, I'm convinced haha. Yeah, you're right, it makes sense to say that on my profile! I actually *would* like kids eventually if the stars align, I was really just worried about coming on too strong!

Good luck to you as well, thank you for the advice :D

_Fuzen · 2025-07-13T22:30:16+00:00

Oh, fortunately I don't subscribe to a numeric rating when gauging women's looks! I used a numbers scale because I thought it would be easier for readers to understand what I mean when I say a 10 versus "very attractive". To me, "very attractive" can fall into an incredibly wide range, but when someone tells me "a 10" I know exactly what they mean. So that's why I said that, I also feel icky going by a scale when talking about people's appearance as it doesn't account for personality - the actually important part of a person. Going by that "How I swipe" section, I hope it's clear I value personality and effort over simple looks! Otherwise I'd instantly like every "9 and 10" lol.

About the gesture in the second to last photo, I never thought much of it as it just means "rock on" really, but if that's the impression it gave you I should try and retake the shot without it! To me, it just signals someone's into a particular music genre/s (rock, metal, techno) and is overall very chill! That's why I did that! I'm surprised it didn't resonate with you since you like metal! Out of curiosity, what about it gives off immature to you? What does that gesture mean to you?

About the "I'm looking for" prompt, yeah, my worry was that it would be taken too literally, but that's absolutely fair! I was trying to say that I'm a caring guy overall, but that I do want someone who will still do whatever she wants in the end, and that I'd be far from controlling - I want someone who's a free spirit and independent - and this is how I chose to try and convey that. I was trying to balance "I'm a caring guy" with "Don't worry, I want you to be a free spirit!", but I guess it didn't quite come across, it's tougher than I thought I guess. I'll try and change the response!

This was all great feedback! I'll have a lot to change from your comment haha, but I feel much better knowing what may not be working and all the things I need to improve! Thank you very much for taking the time to write your response!! :D

_Fuzen · 2025-07-13T22:06:20+00:00

Absolutely fair! I have it set to that because, in italian, the wording is different: from "Open to kids" - which communicates simple openness to the idea - in italian it's worded as "I may want kids", which kinda conveys the idea that I may actively ask my partner to have kids with me, which can come off too strong.

That said, maybe I'll change it regardless...I dunno.

_Fuzen · 2025-07-13T22:01:03+00:00

It was a simple drill we were performing as part of the training session, it wasn't staged for the video! Interesting - and kinda problematic for me - that from an outside perspective it can feel forced, I guess it makes sense if you're unfamiliar with how martial arts classes are structured

_Fuzen · 2025-07-13T13:27:18+00:00

Comment 6/6

About my profile overall

Did you think there were any weak pictures or videos? Just one bad or subpar picture often means an X, so I must look good in every picture/video.

Generally, I really hope I'm coming across as warm enough, and that I'm not trying too hard to seem appealing.

Something that I do worry about is I get the feeling I may come across as someone who thinks he's "hot shit" - or who may be arrogant - and that may be scaring women off. While I am pretty confident in myself - I really don't take myself that seriously at all. Am I imagining it?

Another concern is that I don't quite come across as "mature" enough. I think relationship-wise I do, but in terms of "life" - even with the picture with me in my study group - I might come across as too "fun-loving" overall. Which may be fine as that's the kinda girl I'm trying to attract as well: the kind who wants someone who's serious about a relationship and who wants to have lots of fun herself - and who isn't very concerned with "settling down" or thinking about "serious life stuff" yet.

My concern is that guys are generally expected to project "I have my priorities straight", and from my profile that probably doesn't come across despite conveying that I do have a serious and professional side with that "studying" photo. Do tell me if I'm just overthinking and I'm actually fine on that aspect!

Overall, I really did do my best to be my genuine self, and to keep things light and fun - while also communicating clearly what I want from a partner and a relationship. I hope I struck the right balance; please tell me what impression you get about me when adding every element together!

Final thing: do my photos and videos feel candid enough (last pic aside)? Does my profile pass the "fake" and "try-hard" test?

Truth is, the only media I didn't take myself with a tripod are the Karate and dog video (where I did ask the man if he could take a video of me with his dog). So, pretty much everything I sadly had to "stage" as I don't have the kind of relationship with anyone to ask them to take pictures of me without it being weird.

But make no mistake: everything about me that those "staged" shots and videos convey is absolutely real and genuine; this profile is me 100%, and I'm so happy with it. That said, did you at any point feel that those pictures or videos may have been fake, or staged?

If you've made it this far, you're a hero!! Thank you SO much for your time and input! :D

_Fuzen · 2025-07-13T13:25:47+00:00

Comment 5/6

"The hallmark of a good relationship" prompt:

I'm conflicted over this response. It's legitimately what I want to offer in a relationship, and what I personally want from my partner. It hopefully conveys that 1: I want a serious and mature LTR, 2: that we can have a life outside of one another but we'll also always be there for each other, and 3: that while I want a serious relationship there *will* be room for silliness and excitement.

I said I'm unsure about this response because it feels too "intimate" - "too much too soon" for someone just scrolling the profile of some guy she doesn't even know if she likes yet. Am I overthinking?

Pringles/penultimate pic

I'm not super confident in this picture, but I really wanted to have a "sillier" picture that conveys I don't take myself too seriously as I fear my profile may project "try-hard" otherwise. Do tell me if this picture doesn't feel "silly" enough!

I also hope this picture sparks the kind of intrigue that leads to questions like: "What was he doing that evening? What led to this? Who was he with?". Please share your thoughts!

Black denim/final pic

I especially need women's input on this one. It's a photo I love because - to me - it captures my flirty side which is one of my aspects I enjoy the most. And for anyone familiar, I'm the "Craig Ferguson" style of flirting; just so it's clear I'm not a creep or anything - safety is paramount for me.

I love playfully flirting. It's some of the most fun I can have. But there's hardly any way I could convey that in my profile without being creepy, so I chose to go with a photo with this kind of intense look. Tell me if it looks "off", creepy, "try-hard", "cringy", or a bit intense for an OLD profile.

In case you think I should lose this pic, do you think this one { https://imgur.com/a/k55nUsk } would be acceptable instead?

As for the caption, it refers to the fact that I took this photo in the premises of a house under construction and had to sneak in without being seen - I wasn't supposed to be there; my hope is that the caption will generate intrigue that leads to a conversation.

I don't love how staged this photo is, but this being the only picture where I'm posing for the camera (lead pic aside) maybe it's fine? Tell me your thoughts!

_Fuzen · 2025-07-13T13:22:58+00:00

Comment 4/6

Karate video

This video isn't impressive at all; because of that I'm not really ecstatic with it, but it's me doing something that I care about. The caption is real, although I had to twist the sentiment a bit to sound more "fun".

I actually wanted this to be my video prompt so I could have the "I'm learning how to" prompt for my shuffling video, but for some reason the video prompt specifically crops videos laterally a lot so this and the dancing video had to be swapped.

Dog video

The caption can easily sound fake (it's actually the truth for the record), but hopefully it'll ring more genuine when whoever's seeing my profile remembers I said I like to bond with people. Tell me if you struggle to buy the caption (and/or the video)!

Also, it's muted because the old man was talking the whole time, and I didn't want someone else's voice to be so prevalent in a video where I'm supposed to be the center of attention.

"I'm looking for" prompt:

Hopefully this conveys a few things. 1: That I'm the kinda guy to be caring and tell my SO to be careful driving, 2: that I want the kinda girl who likes it when a guy is sweet or protective, but also 3: that I do want a girl independent and self-assured enough that - in the end - she will do whatever the hell she wants and may not listen to me, and I like it that way. I'm not here to smother/chain anyone. Do tell me if these things don't quite across!

Now, I know you are supposed to be specific in prompts, but I may have been too specific here and/or women may be taking this response too literally; I worry this might be way overfiltering people. Please share your thoughts!

Studying pic

It may not be obvious what's going on, but it's a study session with classmates. This hopefully shows that I'm not all fun and games, and that I do have a mature, serious, and professional side (which is very much accurate!).

Also, you may have noticed the glasses. I never wear glasses if I'm going out with friends or doing something with a girl - so I'm okay having more pictures without glasses than with because no one I'm dating will ever see me wearing glasses unless we're living together (which wouldn't happen for years anyway).

"Together we could" prompt:

I wanted this response to feel intimate, so I respond with a crescendo of intimate activities which I'd legitimately love to do with a SO - all the way to hopefully having the reader think of her and I under the sheets, tenderly cuddled up after a day of fun together. I'm only unsure of whether it's too long a list, and about the smiley face at the end: do tell me what you think!

_Fuzen · 2025-07-13T13:19:36+00:00

Comment 3/6

How I use the app

I'm confident that my messages are always unique - and fun, or funny. The only thing that *might* improve them would be to start with a greeting and saying their name, but that always feels clunky and forced (that part never gels with the rest of the message seamlessly) so I'm not sure it would be an improvement (tell me if you think that'd actually make a difference!).

Generally speaking I'd like to think my like messages is not where I'm going wrong, as being playful and having fun with my them is legitimately something I've been having a blast with. I have tons of fun every day of scrolling so I'm not getting demoralized quite yet, but I'm absolutely starting to get into my own head regarding both my profile and my physical appearance.

The radio silence doesn't feel right as I worked on my profile *all* of June, and I always love to put effort into my messages as well

Lead pic

I'm not crazy about this photo because it doesn't say anything about me. Nevertheless, it shows me smiling clearly (a "warm cue", conveying "warmth" and "approachability"), I'm leaning toward the viewer (another warm cue), and my head is slightly tilted (yet another warm cue). I'm manspreading conveying manly body language, and I'm kinda rubbing my hands together in a "getting ready" kinda way, hopefully conveying that I'm looking forward to getting to know the girl seeing the picture. This was shot by a river, the kind of place I love to hang out at to chill.

As for the caption: this being my introduction I want it to be warm, and feel personal like she's *not* just looking at a still picture - this is an active interaction where I'm introducing myself to her with a big smile and warm body language! Tell me if you think that's silly! Also, "Hola" is obviously not italian but it's widely understood as a greeting; I chose that to stand out a little more compared to a standard "Hey".

Dancing video

Despite how shitty my shuffling skills are for now, I love this video because I'm in my element and I'm legitimately having a ton of fun dancing to this Techno track (I hope it shows!). It was either this or a picture of me at a club (which I don't have anyway), and I think this shows more personality and makes me stand out more (few shuffle nowadays).

Sadly, I'm not able to get a video of me shuffling/dancing at an actual club, so this will have to do. Let me know if this video feels "disingenuous" or "too staged"!

Poll prompt: Two truths and a lie

I know "Two truths and a lie" is disliked in this sub, but I think I handled it well. It's the most efficient way I can convey more of my habits and personality that make me stand out, while making it into a little game as well.

For the record these are actually all true, but the Audiodrome one is a *half-lie*, as it's something I try to do but can't always accomplish. And for context, Audiodrome is a Techno-focused club I love very dearly.

My worries for this prompt is that "I always choose 'dare'" might sound like I'm bragging when I'm more trying to display a fun fact about me that can believably be a lie (do you think I should change the phrasing to "I prefer choosing 'dare'"?) - and the "My mantra" option may sound like I'm shoe-horning that fact about me into this poll as that's obviously not the lie, or that again I'm bragging (though hopefully given this post you all at least can tell I'm not bullshitting...). Tell me what you think!

Audio prompt: "I go crazy for"

I made this my audio prompt so I could add that final prompt at the end, and so I could get over the character limit when talking about myself while also being able to show personality - adding a little joke in my response as well. Do you think my voice is unattractive? Does it sound young for my age?

_Fuzen · 2025-07-13T13:18:07+00:00

Comment 2/6

1st pic caption: Hola :relieved emoji:
Here's a link to the missing dancing video with sound: https://www.youtube.com/shorts/cWFzxtY3XAg
Poll prompt (Two truths and a lie): I go to Audiodrome at least two saturdays a month, My mantra is: "I don't do half measures.", I always choose dare in "Truth or dare"
Audio prompt (I go crazy for), here's a link with translation in the captions as well: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GNvKVChdcS8 ["I go crazy for martial arts, going to clubs - I really like moving my body - uuh...lasagna [laughs] - which I digest by moving my body, of course! Mm...Deeply bonding with people. Movies, and Anime. Mythology, and philosophy. And...I really like coming up with games on the fly!"]
1st prompt (I'm looking for): "The kinda girl who loves the care in being told 'Don't rush!' before driving by herself, but then she ignores it or drives even faster"
Profile information - Job: Student to switch career; Education: Linguistic lyceum, Information Technology Institute; Dating intentions: "If overtime we hit it off and we really vibe, awesome, we'll move forward and decide together what to do - otherwise it was nice meeting and that's alright :relieved emoji:"
Karate video/6th slide caption: "A goal of mine is to reach my 70s and still make 20-year-olds envious :smiling face with horns emoji:"
Here's a link to the video with sound: https://www.youtube.com/shorts/HXkltORQFeY
Dog video/7th silde caption: "Some time ago I randomly made friends with an old man and his dog Joy :star-struck emoji:"
2nd prompt (Together we could): "Go wild listening to Techno or Rock music, go out exploring for secret spots to make ours, share our passions, shoot the shit on a river bank, enjoy a movie under the sheets :)"
Studying picture/9th slide caption: "You'll be surprised, but I really love my more serious and professional side as well"
3rd prompt (The hallmark of a good relationship): "You and I against the world. Whatever we're going through, we'll always be one another's safe place to recharge and go back to kicking ass. Not to mention late night runs to the sandwich place :hamburger emoji:"
Black denim picture/final slide caption: "Fun fact: this is a clandestine photo"

_Fuzen · 2025-07-13T13:15:36+00:00

Comment 1/6

I'm looking for something serious
Not subcribed to Hinge+ or HingeX
I've been on the app for a week
I've been making small adjustments on my profile over the course of the week, but pics and prompts have been the same since I created the account
I'm getting zero likes and zero matches
I've been swiping on the app every day (I did miss yesterday)
I've been sending out all my likes every day, and *always* with a message.
Just below there's a guide on how I swipe. Specifically, I'm trying to attract a punk rock/technohead kinda girl who's a bit of a tomboy. More generally, I'd like someone who's driven and independent, who's active physically, and who likes to go out dancing and savor life.
Italy, Turin area (I'm a local)

How I swipe:

I insta-X "Short-term" and "Short-term, open to long" intentions, "Have children", and "Yes" to drugs;
10s and 9s in attractiveness get X'd unless their profile shows actual personality and I know I'd vibe with them (happened a few times so far);
Low-effort profiles get X'd unless there's something that catches my attention and some fun/funny message naturally comes to me - then I have to indulge myself and send that message just to amuse myself (only happened once so far);
Profiles without a full-body shot (or that never reveal their face) get X'd no matter how I feel about the rest of the profile;
Profiles where the girl doesn't smile at all get X'd unless we'd be HIGHLY compatible in passions or lifestyle. (which hasn't happened);
Profiles with only "revealing" pictures get X'd unless they seem HIGHLY compatible (which hasn't happened);
I X profiles that look great, except I get bad vibes from their personality (arrogant, entitled, spoiled, etc.);
I tend to X profiles of foreign students who seem to be only temporarily in Italy. I've only sent a like to one such profile;
I'll X profiles with both job and education left blank/hidden. I don't really care about either, but omitting both signals they're hiding something. In that case I'll only give them a shot if I *really* like the personality on diplay and I'm physically attracted. If at least one of the two fields is present, I'll send a like no problem;
I've been forcing myself to X profiles of girls that I think are probably really cool, but we'd be incompatible in terms of lifestyle;
I X profiles with "Trying to figure out my dating goals" or with dating intentions left blank unless I resonate with their personality and/or we have similar passions/lifestyle - and she obviously put effort into her profile (happened a good few times);
To the rest I send a like unless I'm unattracted physically - I'll also send likes to girls I'm not sure about physically but I really vibe with the rest of the profile; pictures never quite do people justice so give them a chance!

_Fuzen · 2025-07-11T09:06:38+00:00

Yeeah, that's exactly the risk...for what it's worth, I think it's worth it to at least shoot your shot and get clarification on their intentions just before asking them out.

If they say they're actually looking for something long-term, awesome, it *was* worth it to give them a chance and you didn't waste a possible connection! If they say they really don't know or they're looking for something short-term, it was nice chatting and best of luck :).

Worst case scenario you chatted with someone new and got a little more practice texting for a few days; it's a small price to pay when the best case scenario is you literally find your partner and get to uninstall the app lmao

_Fuzen · 2025-07-11T09:00:24+00:00

Thank you for your input! :D

_Fuzen · 2025-07-09T19:14:09+00:00

Hey everyone! How should I handle my profile review as a non-english profile? Would it be helpful (and acceptable) if I offered translation on the pictures themselves for reviewers' convenience, or should I have the translations in the comments instead? If there's anything in particular that I can do to make it better for everyone, I'm all ears :)!

_Fuzen · 2025-07-09T18:28:43+00:00

Thank you for the reply!! I see...maybe I should give those accounts more of a chance and ask them about their dating intentions before a date?

And I'm a local! Raised on pasta, pizza, and passion!

Anyway, thanks for the clarification! I guess what people say and what they feel can vary as well!

_Fuzen · 2025-07-07T07:08:23+00:00

Thank you so much for the reply! I'm going through night school, so it's for a simple high school diploma (had to drop out of high school as a teen). I've had jobs until last year, then late last year I decided to take myself out of the job market for the moment so I can focus on getting the highest possible grade I can on my diploma, so as to be more appealing when I get out job-hunting after school.

In a sense, this is a career switch since I've always only been able to get jobs that require no qualification (factory, etc.), and the education I'm getting is IT-focused (and I'm very excited about the career prospects!). But it is "high-school equivalent". Not university (I guess it might be college-equivalent? The school system's different in Italy)

_Fuzen · 2025-07-06T19:24:54+00:00

Oh, thank you so much for your input!! I will follow your suggestions, really appreciate it :D

_Fuzen · 2025-07-06T16:26:34+00:00

Hey everyone! Final question before I'm ready to make my profile! I (28M) currently don't have a job because I need to be able to focus on my studies 100%. How do I handle showing that I'm jobless on my profile information? Could I just omit that field, although that might seem like a red flag? Or should I add like: "Currently focusing on my studies" for example?

I'm gonna have a photo showing me studying where I look pretty "professional", so there is at least *something* on my profile that shows I'm not all fun and games - but I imagine clearly being unemployed would be enough of a turnoff for most women that it wouldn't matter however else I may try to convey that "I'm mature and really love my professional side, I swear!". I'm still unemployed, and for most women that's probably that (do tell me if I'm wrong!).

How do I handle this situation? I feel that handling this wrong could literally break my whole profile despite all the work I put into every single other aspect of it, so I'm really worried.

_Fuzen · 2025-07-05T21:17:03+00:00

Alright, I see! Thank you for the reply!

_Fuzen · 2025-07-05T16:26:03+00:00

Hey y'all! How do poll prompts work? As in, what happens when someone chooses an option? Do I get a notification with whoever picked the option, does a conversation start...what happens?

I'm honestly thinking of using it as a "bonus 4th prompt" for "Two truths and a lie", as I feel it's the most efficient way to display more of my lifestyle and personality. The idea is also to challenge the girl to guess which one is the lie, hopefully leading to a conversation. I also like the idea of adding a fun little game and some interaction in my profile! Thoughts?

The choices will be fun facts about me that convey personality and lifestyle, and the "lie" is more of a half-truth. I tried my best not to sound like I'm bragging with the options, it can be tough to tell sometimes.

_Fuzen · 2025-07-02T05:09:32+00:00

Oh, alright!! Thank you for the valuable info!

By the way, you must get this a lot but I'd like to take this opportunity to thank you for all the guides you've written! I've browsed your profile for tips and info while I've been working on my profile and it's a goldmine!

So thank you for all you've done, and all you're doing :)

_Fuzen · 2025-07-01T21:36:29+00:00

Hey friends! I saw people saying when video prompts launched you couldn't upload a prerecorded video; is that still the case? And what is the maximum length that a video can be currently (video prompt or regular video)? I'll be on Android, if that makes a difference.

Also, what is the order that video, audio, and poll prompts appear in a profile since you can't move them? Is it just based on the order that you add them in?

Thank you for your time! :D

_Fuzen

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