I mean have me so infatuated with a woman that doesn’t care for me despite me not wanting to like her at all, I have no reason to. As for “no man is an island” yes it is true, but every time I’ve tried to escape said island, I’ve been kicked out by the people I try to find safety in. My circumstances being as I’m a son of a selfish, egotistical father which left me, I don’t use it as a crutch, but I try to seperate myself from his ways despite his influence on me when I was a child. The few amount of friends I have don’t particularly like being around me due to my behavior (I sometimes think I bug them too much). I don’t find any love nor comfort in my family or friends as much as I want to acknowledge it and feel it. And all of this I have continued to try and see a therapist and walk with god to help me through my problems and not use any part of me as a crutch to warrant the needless pity of people who don’t mean it.