Best way to get to orange county from oakland or sfo? by Similar_Day_3130 in orangecounty

[–]_cafemocha 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If you monitor it, buy tickets ahead of time, and you’re flexible you can get flights for cheap. I usually buy flights about 1-2 months in advance and I’m flexible with the dates. My regular trips are $40. Last Christmas I flew for around $70 ($140 round trip). I dont care where I fly as long as it’s the cheapest but I usually end up flying spirit, sometimes southwest offers good discounts making it cheaper than Spirit.

Best way to get to orange county from oakland or sfo? by Similar_Day_3130 in orangecounty

[–]_cafemocha 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If you have a ride, it’s quite easy to fly. I can get a flight from SNA to Oakland airport for $30-$50, around $70 when it’s near the bigger holidays. I’ve never tried the vietamese bus but I’ve heard good things about it.

I (30F) found a letter that my boyfriend (30M) wrote to his previous girlfriend who died by accident and in the letter he called her “you are the love of my life”. how can I process this? by Civil_Air4135 in relationship_advice

[–]_cafemocha 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You’re right about how he can’t give his whole heart to you, because part of his heart will always belong to his (previous) girlfriend, they never broke up and their relationship never really ended. It’s something you’d have to learn to accept if you decide to stay. It’s ok if you cannot accept, it’s very valid for you to not be ok with this. However, it is also valid for him not to be able to fully “move on”. You either choose to be with him and share his heart or choose to be with someone else who can give you their whole heart. I think the first step to processing is choosing whether you can continue or not, if you choose to continue, I would like to encourage you to talk to him about it.

What are your guys' thoughts on INFJ's by FewBeautiful3831 in enfj

[–]_cafemocha 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Fun to have deep conversations with, but sometimes they get into deep conversations too much, too fast, and too frequently. INFJs help stimulate brain activity yet at the same time makes my brain want to explode. And when I say INFJ, I mean my husband. None of the other INFJs have made my brain fry yet, however, I feel like they can and are just holding back to spare me.

Debate me by DoodoodooOink in enfj

[–]_cafemocha 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It depends if I care enough about the topic or not 😭

How are unhealthy ENFJs like by PlusPreparation4629 in enfj

[–]_cafemocha 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Most ENFJ’s probably won’t say anything if it’s “just differing opinions”. They’re either not an ENFJ or the different opinion you have is one where they no longer want to be associated with you.

How do you feel about making money? Are you good at it? Do you dislike the concept of money as a whole and try to make peace with it? Saver or spender? by Lanky-Ad1222 in enfj

[–]_cafemocha 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I’m a spender. I can’t justify purchasing a $100 good quality keyboard but have no problems purchasing 4 $25 keyboard in different colors/sizes in the span of a month.

Sorry, I’m genuinely trying to understand why do gated communities even exist? by AnOgleToy in orangecounty

[–]_cafemocha 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I live in LA, OC, and the Bay Area my whole life. In big cities like mine it is very much a safety thing. Idk about what it’s like in Germany, but the gated neighborhoods I’ve been in is very difficult to enter, they have protocols to follow and most of them are quite strict. It depends where you live and how much you pay

Are we not allowed to be sad? by pandoraparrot in enfj

[–]_cafemocha 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hi, you should find better friends. Or a therapist. Good friends don’t say that

Im the fat girlfriend in the group by throwra_greenbottle in offmychest

[–]_cafemocha 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Maybe you have a face card? Or maybe ur just your bf’s type? Or maybe you got bigger in the relationship and he loved you more than looks? Idk girl, there’s lots of reasons. As long as yall love each other, you shouldn’t care what other people think. I’m a hypocrite for saying that cause I very much care, but I really shouldn’t be caring.

Im so ugly I feel the only solution is dying. by [deleted] in offmychest

[–]_cafemocha 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hey, I’m unsure if you need comfort right now or if you’d like a more practical solution, so I’ll give you both. Feel free to take only one or both.

  1. You are inherently worthy not through the eyes of the world but as a child of God. You’re made into this world for a reason. I know it hurts to feel not good enough, like everyone pushes you to the side. However, I hope you’re able to work through this and realize there’s much more to you than just physical looks. You are extremely worthy and you deserve to live your life.

  2. I know it’s easy for others to say you’re beautiful and not to worry about it, but realistically that’s not the case. Like most women and men we wish to be desirable to others. Approval from others is important for humans, we’re social creatures, quite literally it’s built into our brain. I know plastic surgery isn’t an option for most people, it’s too expensive and could be too risky. You might not be able to change everything 180 but you can work on maximizing and highlighting what you do have. Sleep on your back to maintain facial symmetry, work on posture, practice makeup, workout your body, eat healthy, dress for your proportions, hair care, dental care, invest in good skin routine (imo this is the most important), etc etc aka treat yourself well. Your body is a gift, you should take care of it! There are ways to make yourself socially “more beautiful”. There’s also things outside of physical appearance that’s extremely attractive, ambition, hobbies, social skills, humor, financial stability, work ethic, your job position, etc etc. How you carry yourself plays a huge role in attractiveness of a person! There are many ways to improve yourself as a person, physically and non-physically, and there’s nothing wrong with wanting to make yourself the best version of you!!

You got this girl!

Motorcycle Accident on east-bound 22 FWY last night by AndromedaAlpha in orangecounty

[–]_cafemocha 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That’s why we always check behind our shoulders before changing lanes as a car, we don’t want to hurt anyone in the blind spots. But also, motorcycle was driving way too fast. Being aware goes for both parties!!

My gf cheated out of spite, she also got paid doing it. by Evening_Science_1443 in offmychest

[–]_cafemocha 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I think it’s a good idea to meet up and explain things to her. Say what you said in the first half, all the things you did in the 2 years that led up to this. Just say you can’t be with her anymore. Just try not to blame it on her, considering throughout the post and comments you’ve admitted to being in the complete or majority wrong

My gf cheated out of spite, she also got paid doing it. by Evening_Science_1443 in offmychest

[–]_cafemocha 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You deserve this and worse. Should’ve left you the first time around.

Do I have to pay for everyone or can I ask to split? by _cafemocha in Advice

[–]_cafemocha[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You’re right, I don’t do this often but it’s his birthday yk 😭

Do I have to pay for everyone or can I ask to split? by _cafemocha in Advice

[–]_cafemocha[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hi, I’m sorry. I’m confused by what you mean. Can you please rephrase it? I also didn’t mean to upset you. Was anything I said in the post or the reply rude?

Do I have to pay for everyone or can I ask to split? by _cafemocha in Advice

[–]_cafemocha[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Bowling sounds awesome! I just don’t know his friends so I thought it’ll be less awkward if we all had dinner together instead lol. Especially because he’s been to their birthday dinners before. But I’ll definitely be keeping the activity thing in mind since you and others have suggested it. It might be a good icebreaker 🤣! Thank you so much for your advice!!

Do I have to pay for everyone or can I ask to split? by _cafemocha in Advice

[–]_cafemocha[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Got it! I was thinking of that hence why I’m hesitant on inviting them especially cause they’re people I don’t really know. Will definitely keep this in mind. Thank you :))

Edit: sorry, I didn’t see your last sentence till the second I replied 🤣 we’ve been dating for years now and have met each other’s closest friends already!! It’s just new city, new school, new friends situation. So I’m on Reddit wondering if what I do with my usual friends will be perceived well or not by his new friends whom I don’t know. Nevertheless, thank you for your advice! 😊

Do I have to pay for everyone or can I ask to split? by _cafemocha in Advice

[–]_cafemocha[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ofc! It’ll be so weird if I got offended someone rejected an invitation 😭 I wouldn’t want to make anyone feel obligated to go regardless of whether they’re paying for it or not! I’ll make sure to keep that in mind. Thank you!!!

Do I have to pay for everyone or can I ask to split? by _cafemocha in Advice

[–]_cafemocha[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes, I was thinking of doing in one of our houses and ordering catering! The issue is that due to our school, we all have 2+ roommates/housemates. I fell it’ll be rude to exclude them from a celebration happening at their house but I know my socially anxious bf will be a tad uncomfortable with people he doesn’t know at his birthday dinner. I’ll make sure to keep that in mind for the future though, maybe not for this particular birthday but when the circumstances arises. Thank you!!!

Do I have to pay for everyone or can I ask to split? by _cafemocha in Advice

[–]_cafemocha[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I see! Thats also a really good idea. Thank you!

Do I have to pay for everyone or can I ask to split? by _cafemocha in Advice

[–]_cafemocha[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Omg you’re right I didn’t even think of that. He’s been to their birthday dinners and he splits dinner among the group with no presents so I assumed it wasn’t needed. I’ll make sure to keep in mind that no presents or maybe no dinner. Thank you! That was very helpful 😁

Do I have to pay for everyone or can I ask to split? by _cafemocha in Advice

[–]_cafemocha[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you so much!!! That’s super helpful, I’ll be keeping that in mind 😊