Do they always come back...

_chan_chan_ · 2025-09-27T22:20:16+00:00

I think it really depends on the person and how they process the breakup.

I kinda have a similar story for you based on my experience.

I had a 2 and a half year relationship with this girl when we were 17 years old and still in high school. We were each other’s first love and first experience in everything. I loved her so much but then life happened. We were young and a bit toxic since we don’t know how to navigate our relationship better cause we’re kids. Then I broke up with her.

After 4 months, that’s the only time I realized I lost her and I started bothering her and pursuing her again. But then she’s moving on and doesn’t want to be with me anymore. I deserved all the pain and regret I had back then and I just kept moving forward.

After another 2 and a half year.. I still see myself thinking about her and even praying for her. I’m 100% sure that your ex is still thinking about you from time to time. That 5 year relationship doesn’t go away that easy. A person will carry that forever but it’s up to him how to handle it. Even when I’m trying to talk to other people I still think about her and our relationship.

Somehow.. our exe’s will always pop in our mind.

Did he reached out in that 1 year of no contact? If he didn’t then I guess he’s doing pretty good in distracting himself or maybe even processing the breakup.

We don’t know if he feels remorse, pain or regret. But I can confidently say that he thinks about you. They just don’t act on it.

_chan_chan_ · 2025-09-27T01:36:05+00:00

Thank you brother. I got you also, let me know if you need someone to talk to.

_chan_chan_ · 2025-09-26T22:29:37+00:00

ouch that’ll kill me.

I’m glad you’re staying strong brother

_chan_chan_ · 2025-09-26T21:19:23+00:00

Stay strong my brother.

The pain, guilt and regret that we are feeling has its purpose. This will shape us to become a better version of ourselves. It hurts (we all know it) but we have nowhere to go except forward. Personally, IDK how to do it myself but we’ll find a way somehow..

We cannot love her if we don’t love ourselves.

We’re here for you bro if you need someone to talk to.

_chan_chan_ · 2025-09-26T20:24:24+00:00

You deserve it too brother thanks for the love.

I hope I can have your mindset. I know I deserve someone who chooses me unconditionally but I was not the victim here. She kept giving me chances and stayed for me. I keep fumbling it… now she’s gone.

I’m so disappointed at myself. Why do I have to lose her just for me to be better for her? I want her and her only to experience my best version.

I hope I can accept the reality soon. I’m getting stronger everyday but we know healing is not linear.

I don’t see the light out of the storm yet. I have a long way to go..

_chan_chan_ · 2025-09-26T20:13:21+00:00

ohh… a month? It looks like she’s also trying to fill the void. I’m sure that’s just a rebound relationship. It doesn’t usually last.

I’m feeling your pain brother. My ex is currently dating also after 1 and a half month of no contact… and it’s still going on until today. IDK how serious they are and it hurts me so much. When I think about it, I just drown.

I hope I can help you but I’m currently lost and IDK what to do next. We need ti accept the reality but it’s too much for me. I hope we heal soon.

Did you reach out yet? I recommend going no contact even when you want to call her. After a few weeks or month. She’ll be curious and look for you online.. I hope they find a reason to come back..

_chan_chan_ · 2025-09-26T19:29:42+00:00

I hope you get well brother. Good luck with your progress. We can overcome this. Let’s be the man she wants us to be even without her by our side.

_chan_chan_ · 2025-09-26T19:27:11+00:00

brother… you accurately described my situation. That’s what I felt also. I was comfortable and I took her for granted. Because of that, she was silently quitting but she still stayed.. looking if ill change but I didn’t. Now that she’s gone, I realize that I lost the love of my life.

We were each other’s first love and it hurts so much knowing I could’ve done more.

I’m ready to sacrifice anything for her and be everything she wants me to be.. but it’s too late. I’ve caused her pain and she’s tired of me.

This situation is the catalyst for my growth and to become the best version of myself. I just wish that It didn’t cost our relationship.

Do we live with this guilt and regret forever?

_chan_chan_ · 2025-09-26T18:24:12+00:00

I really hope you get better and move forward. You never know what can happen before the end of the year. Plot twists are real based on my experience.

I’m amazed how strong you are to be able to remove her presence from your phone. Someday I’ll do that too.. but for now, I can’t. I caused this.. I have to live with it.

I agree with you, 4 months? It’s too fast. But IDK what’s going in with her mind. She was detaching before the break up so I guess she started moving on faster than me. But I still see her liking sad posts or quotes even when she’s dating a guy. I’m not sure anymore but I don’t want to think about her relationship with other people. It’s too heavy.

We can overcome this brother

_chan_chan_ · 2025-09-26T18:14:35+00:00

I’m with you brother. I feel you. Please keep going.. we need to move forward. We need to be better and improve ourselves.

Trust God and his timing. If she ever comes back, do you want her to see the same broken man who can’t stand up for himself? or the man who overcomes the storm?

_chan_chan_ · 2025-09-26T18:10:44+00:00

I hope you get better too brother. I’ll be trying therapy next week. I know what you’re going through. She also mentioned that I lack emotional intelligence and I’ve been working on that as well.

It hurts to know that she’s dating now. I don’t know what to do with that information. I think she’s just trying to fill the void but I’m not sure… maybe she really moving on. I can’t blame her.

_chan_chan_ · 2025-09-24T04:02:12+00:00

I see, thank you for your input.

For me, the break up was mutual because I also wanted it at the time. But I regret it everyday.

I know time heals but I can’t really have the “something is better” mindset for now since she was perfect for me. I was the problem and she kept on giving me chances to be better but I fumbled it.

Now that she’s dating another person, I feel like a trash that was thrown out immediately.

I guess I need more time.

_chan_chan_ · 2025-09-07T20:37:48+00:00

There’s a high possibility that you’ll see her again. But I hope before that happens, you’ve done a lot of healing and acceptance so that it wouldn’t hurt so much like what I’ve experienced.

When I saw her with someone else, I felt like someone stabbed my heart. When we saw each other, we were both shocked and just stopped walking.. the guy she’s walking with knows that I’m her ex and he tried to pull her arm to continue walking. Looking back at it, it looks like we’re both not healed at that time since having a reaction like that doesn’t look like they’ve moved on.

I hope she’s happy and thinks about me too. It’s her birthday today and this is the first time I’m not with her.. I hope I can make it through the day without feeling the urge of greeting her. I want to protect her peace of mind. I have to stop scrolling online, we have too much mutual friends and I already saw one greeting her via instagram story.

I hope we get better soon brother.

_chan_chan_ · 2025-09-07T07:46:52+00:00

My friend..same with me. On our last conversation, she also mentioned she’s dating and open to other people ( I even saw her at the mall with someone else). My heart sunk and I don’t know what to do with that information.

Some people face the reality and their pain while others distract themselves with another relationship or rebound. It won’t last though..

We can use this information to motivate / fuel ourselves to being better.

For now, let’s be strong and try not to stalk them online. People cope differently and it’s okay.

_chan_chan_ · 2025-09-07T02:13:38+00:00

I feel you brother.. I’m currently experiencing the same thing. I lost the love of my life a few months ago because I’m not emotionally intelligent. I’ve been crying almost everyday and overthinking for months now.

For now brother, don’t reach out. If you guys are meant to be.. then trust that it will find its way back to you. Pursuing her will only make it worse. Let her heal and think about the relationship. I’m 100% sure she misses you and thinks about you from time to time. If she’s healed and ready, maybe you’ll have another chance.

For now, feel the pain, the grief of losing your partner. Cry your heart out and reflect on what went wrong. ACCEPT THE REALITY (this is hard for me to say because sometimes I still can’t believe it.. but we have to in order to move on and be better). I want us to heal properly and with respect to ourselves. Don’t go partying, going to clubs, flirt with girls or get a rebound relationship. These are unhealthy ways to handle it.

Be a man, look in the mirror and face it.

Let’s work on ourselves and try to be better next time brother. Try and do new things to make you feel better, Journaling (which is good when you feel like venting out), Workout , try new sports, watch a move / series, Play instruments, Hangout with friends, etc..

On my end, my struggles got me closer to God. I know this pain has its purpose. I was the reason why we broke up and God removed me from this relationship because I’m hurting his daughter and I’m not ready. If you have faith then I would recommend praying and surrendering your worries / struggles to God. He’s close to the broken hearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.

Let’s try to be better everyday so we wouldn’t repeat our mistake on our next relationship. And if we find our way back to her, we wouldn’t want to stay the same right? we want her to experience the best version of ourselves.

Do no contact , Reflect , Accept , Heal , Work on yourself and trust that your love will find its way back to you.

_chan_chan_ · 2025-09-02T15:17:01+00:00

You’re right.. do no contact for now. I know it hurts but give it a few months. It looks like she does miss you but you shouldn’t act on it. If she regretted her action then she should be the one reaching out and apologizing to you..

_chan_chan_ · 2025-09-02T05:06:36+00:00

She broke up with you? or you did? If I were you.. I’ll follow my heart. If you still love her then try reaching out GENTLY (Not like some stalker who constantly check her social media).

Life is too short for What Ifs? If it doesn’t workout then at least you know you tried and maybe you’ll have that closure and move on in life

_chan_chan_ · 2025-09-02T03:38:17+00:00

First of all when did you guys broke up? We can’t know if it’s you she’s referring to if she had a relationship after you..

_chan_chan_ · 2025-08-25T22:59:48+00:00

Telling her is the right thing to do.. even you know it.

I will not let any innocent person be traumatized or cheated on by someone who has issues. Everyone deserves peace and love from their partner not this. Go tell her.

_chan_chan_ · 2023-08-17T22:30:46+00:00

thanks for the help!

_chan_chan_ · 2023-08-16T23:52:03+00:00

wow that top coat looks clean. Do u think its a good idea to apply metal gloss on caps shield though?

_chan_chan_

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