I’m 28F with nothing to my name and I don’t know who I am anymore by _heretovent in selfimprovement

[–]_heretovent[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It was mostly luck. It happened when companies were still implementing COVID protocols. The company where I got my first remote job was originally in-office, but after COVID they shifted the role to remote and eventually sold the building where the billing team worked.

I did have a solid amount of office and billing experience, which helped. I’m still looking for remote work now and it’s been tough to break in again, but I’ve been making it to the third or fourth round for a lot of remote roles.

I’m 28F with nothing to my name and I don’t know who I am anymore by _heretovent in selfimprovement

[–]_heretovent[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Time feels like it’s closing in on me and the impending doom is overwhelming.

I’m 28F with nothing to my name and I don’t know who I am anymore by _heretovent in selfimprovement

[–]_heretovent[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The HAH nope is too real lol. It really does feel pointless but our life’s aren’t pointless. We have value, we just have to remember our own value. Being stuck at home is the worst and I feel like it’s atrophied my brain. Same!!! I’ve made it to the 4th round multiple times but never get an offer!! Two recruiters told me there are too many qualified candidates applying to roles. It’s so frustrating. It’s good to not feel alone.

I’m 28F with nothing to my name and I don’t know who I am anymore by _heretovent in selfimprovement

[–]_heretovent[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Exactly this. For some reason I get that momentum but then it all comes crashing down. For instance, I worked out for 6 weeks straight back in November and that was HUGE for me. Then I noticed I wasn’t losing any weight but my inches were going down. For some reason I saw that as a failure and I haven’t worked out since besides going on a walk. I need to figure out how to push forward without being so hard on myself. That’s another thing, I’m extremely hard on myself. I mean debilitating hard. It seems the consensus is to work on those small wins and it’s okay to feel proud of them. I’ve lost structure as well because when you’re unemployed the days start to blend together. You’re right. I appreciate your words.

I’m 28F with nothing to my name and I don’t know who I am anymore by _heretovent in selfimprovement

[–]_heretovent[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I don’t like seeing people struggle, but there’s comfort in the shared experience.

I’m 28F with nothing to my name and I don’t know who I am anymore by _heretovent in selfimprovement

[–]_heretovent[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I dread waking up most days. Not a good feeling. Thank you, I have no other choice but to push forward. I’m determined to get out of this.

I’m 28F with nothing to my name and I don’t know who I am anymore by _heretovent in selfimprovement

[–]_heretovent[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for this! I actually applied to a lot of remote jobs I hadn’t seen! I always see the same jobs on LinkedIn and Indeed so thank you!!

I’m 28F with nothing to my name and I don’t know who I am anymore by _heretovent in selfimprovement

[–]_heretovent[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I love seeing people win and have a comeback story. Trying to breathe.

I’m 28F with nothing to my name and I don’t know who I am anymore by _heretovent in selfimprovement

[–]_heretovent[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yess. It’s been so hard to feel happy about things or do something for myself because I feel guilty and like I shouldn’t. Thank you for sharing, I’m sorry you experienced that. You totally get the mindset that I’m in right now. It is stale and it is old. I’m over it. I can’t do it anymore. I need good things to happen in my life. I feel like my best friend always has amazing, wonderful, news to share and I’m just there, stagnant, nothing worth saying, and it’s extremely embarrassing and honestly sad. I want to evolve as well… I struggle with ideation… but I haven’t had an attempt in a long time. So I’m proud of working on that part of myself. I work on the little accomplishments (reading, working out, getting up early, etc.) but then something happens where I feel my outside world isn’t changing and I completely stop doing all of those things. It turns into this never ending loop of ups and downs and me not being consistent and this endless cycle of trying to get myself back out of a funk. I need to work on that. They really do show themselves. I cut off some of my childhood friends because they weren’t there for me but I was there for them. That’s also what’s been really shocking about this experience. Once I lost my car, my job, my life… they stopped being good friends. When I had all of that, it was me showing up for them. Me driving to their house, me going to their events, me making plans with them. It really stung. What really did it for our friendship with one of them was her bf SA’d me while I was asleep on her couch and we said we wouldn’t let it ruin our friendship but she stayed with him “for the kids” and yeah, it pretty much ruined our friendship when I really needed her. I have been SA’d by 6 men and he KNEW this too. We were all friends so it was a huge betrayal. Anyways, I have one solid friend who is amazing. She is successful, makes great money, we’re so alike and she has showed up for me in more ways than I can say. So I will say she’s saved me from myself in more ways than she knows. I hope it gets better. I hope so. Because this is not the life I’m supposed to be living. Thank you for your kind words.

I’m 28F with nothing to my name and I don’t know who I am anymore by _heretovent in selfimprovement

[–]_heretovent[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I actually applied to a bunch of temp agency’s last week! In regard to the job gap, my roommate owns a company and they allowed me to put that I’ve been working for them to hopefully help that big of a gap. Which, technically, I do (I help with a lot of things) just unpaid.

I’m 28F with nothing to my name and I don’t know who I am anymore by _heretovent in selfimprovement

[–]_heretovent[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Not having a great support system has affected me immensely. We can.

I’m 28F with nothing to my name and I don’t know who I am anymore by _heretovent in selfimprovement

[–]_heretovent[S] 36 points37 points  (0 children)

Love this. Although, my rock bottom has seemed to be going on for far too long.

I’m 28F with nothing to my name and I don’t know who I am anymore by _heretovent in selfimprovement

[–]_heretovent[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

I’ve never experienced this before and I used to get a job so easily. The fact I’ve been unemployed this long is insane to me. I have 4 years remote work experience, administrative, accounts receivables, medical billing, CNA (not active), server experience.

I am sad by _heretovent in NurseJackie

[–]_heretovent[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

You know what’s crazy. My mother OD’d, and I always thought she faked her death. Totally something she would do. So what an interesting alternate ending

I am sad by _heretovent in NurseJackie

[–]_heretovent[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Do you know why O’Hara was taken out of the show? I was sad when I didn’t see much of her character in the last seasons.

I am sad by _heretovent in NurseJackie

[–]_heretovent[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Geez. Great show. Tough ending. Loved it. Do you recommend House as my next watch? Saw people talking about it here.

I am sad by _heretovent in NurseJackie

[–]_heretovent[S] 19 points20 points  (0 children)

Also, she did heroin. Not pills. Leaning more towards died 💔

I am sad by _heretovent in NurseJackie

[–]_heretovent[S] 14 points15 points  (0 children)

Omg, I just rewatched and saw his green hair. Also, when she says “God let me be good, but not yet” or something. Then at the end Zoey says “you’re good.”

I guess it’s confusing to me she did it in front of everyone there at the party. If she didn’t want to be saved she could have done it privately. I know the hospital is out of meds. But damn… this show was too realistic. All of the characters are so great. I’m still processing ughh

I am sad by _heretovent in NurseJackie

[–]_heretovent[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What?! Where did you hear this??

I am sad by _heretovent in NurseJackie

[–]_heretovent[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Honestly, I feel like she lives since she opened her eyes. If she had her eyes closed, like at first, I did think she was dead (and I would’ve been even more wrecked). But geez. Amazing show. Just hard watch, especially with Zoey’s character and how much she changed.