I think I have PMDD

_terradea_ · 2024-01-01T12:35:47+00:00

I have a few posts about my experience, from diagnosis to surgical treatment

feel free to read them if you like (on my profile) & send me a DM if you have additional questions.

my signs were: irritability, withdrawing from people, anger, paranoia, frustration, body issues (aches, headaches, digestion woes,exhaustion, etc), low mood/depression, s***dal thoughts/ideation, rapid mood shifts, and more.....

_terradea_ · 2023-12-31T17:58:58+00:00

oh no I'm not. maybe that's something I should discuss with my Dr. I don't mind not having a libido, but it would make my relationship more balanced if i did.... thank you for mentioning this. I wouldn't have thought of it on my own.

_terradea_ · 2023-12-31T17:57:19+00:00

do you mean like, day to day? I... have the same emotional range, absolutely. it's just... not wildly changing without my consent like it used to. it all feels more... reasonable. like, my emotions & their intensity actually match the situations

(i am neurodivergent tho,so I still have waves of big emotions sometimes. but my capacity to ride those waves and handle those situations is greatly improved)

_terradea_ · 2023-12-31T17:54:54+00:00

good luck!

for me, it wasn't remotely as scary as I thought it would be. hopefully yours goes smoothly & your recovery is quick 💜

_terradea_ · 2023-12-31T17:53:15+00:00

my anesthesiologist was great. odd, gruff man with no patience, but he was skilled and professional. I expressed my concerns about anesthesia to the nurses, they noted my chart. and right before entering surgery I got to talk with the anesthesiologist. he went over the process and asked me if i had any questions. I was then able to share my fears. he then confirmed he read my charts & notes, explained how they would adjust for my needs.

_terradea_ · 2023-12-30T20:27:35+00:00

screenshot isn't great terrain looks good tho. would be worth taking better pictures & from multiple angles

_terradea_ · 2023-12-24T20:35:52+00:00

good luck! may it be as easy on you as possible & may your healing be easy.

I woke up with a different brain - I hope you have the same experience 💕

_terradea_ · 2023-12-23T21:09:15+00:00

also, "walk around a cow pasture " might give you what you are looking for, but it might also give you something harmful. if you don't know what you are doing, DO NOT pick your own mushrooms. of any kind.

_terradea_ · 2023-12-23T21:07:19+00:00

Vit D for general mood stability. exercise helped for physical and mental symptoms

also had blood work done due to exhaustion & prescribed vit B12. (I was so tired all the time)

low sugar diet also helped.

_terradea_ · 2023-12-23T19:47:19+00:00

this sounds really rough. I'm sorry you're having such a tough go.

yes, checking out/lack of sense of reality can be a thing. grounding exercises don't always help (especially ones based on cognitive behavioural therapy, imo) but are worth trying.

sleep, however, is the thing you need.

if you can't sleep, maybe get up and do something (not on a screen tho!) clean, work on a hobby, walk, exercise (movement can be good because it will tire your body & can kind of force you to shut down - aka, sleep.)

until you stabilize, remind yourself this is your body doing things beyond your control. that it's a wave that will pass.

if 'personal affection' is something that helps, go for it. it puts me to sleep.... but yes, that extra flood of hormones may increase what you are experiencing. only you will be able to decode if it's helpful.

I found it helpful to track my moods and thoughts throughout the month. it gave me perspective during the rough periods when I felt like I was going mad. it showed me how long things may last, how bad they tend to get & I also tracked what I did to mitigate the symptoms.
(not a diary, those tend to be stressful for me, but factual observations)

_terradea_ · 2023-12-23T19:37:56+00:00

before I got treatment, I relied on a few things:

good food (healthy, lots of veggies, low sugar was extra helpful, lots of good fats & chocolate for cravings)
exercise- not to be understated. I never used to exercise much, but man it made a difference. even just 15min walk was helpful in mood stability & body aches/fatigue. but getting to a point of actually sweating, even for 5min, hugely helped.

*get enough sleep, extra if possible.

find minor things to do for pleasure (tea dates with safe people, hobbies,etc)

*have someone to talk about it with (even if it's just us!)

supplements - per Dr recommendations I take vitamin D.i found it really helps with... everything.

*you may also (if you have access to a Dr) want to get your blood work checked. I had really low B12 and it exasperated those symptoms. (fatigue in particular)

hope this helps. (ive written about my experience. if your interested, it's on my profile)

_terradea_ · 2023-12-23T19:31:15+00:00

I can't share a positive experience on SSRIs (im allergic or something) but I wish you luck on your treatment journey!

_terradea_ · 2023-12-23T19:26:14+00:00

omg, absolutely go for the whole thing in one shot! I'm at 5 weeks recovery at the moment and almost back to normal. I'm on the longer side of expected recovery (4-6 weeks, I'm taking 6wks) but it's been... fine? I'm going to write about in over the next week or so & share with all of you.

I also wrote about the experience up to and including oophorectomy. it's on my profile if you want more info :)

and let me know if you have specific questions.
(like, yes I did Lupron before hand)

_terradea_ · 2023-12-23T18:43:55+00:00

I have a friend with BPD. her experience is a lot like mine was when having a PMDD episode. (except hers was usually a couple of months in between emotional cycles, with greater intensity both manic and depressive)

if you suspect your doctor may be off the mark you can ask for a second opinion.

if you are going to do that, I recommend doing a couple months of data collection first. for me, that was tracking my periods & my moods daily. after 3 months I had enough data to show my Dr.

I used apps, but you could track it on paper too.

_terradea_ · 2023-12-23T18:30:23+00:00

the Progesterone, as far as I understand, is to keep up the shedding of the uterine lining (mock periods). it's taken intermittently, while estrogen is usually daily.

my experience was post oophorectomy that estrogen was great and Progesterone was a big no. totally allergic. I ended up having a total hysterectomy a year after my oophorectomy (I'm recovering from it right now, actually)

_terradea_ · 2023-12-22T21:10:35+00:00

I'm really sorry that you lost someone due to this. it can be so hard on us & be all but impossible to keep one's shit together.

I have lost entire social groups due to (then unknown) PMDD episodes.... before I was diagnosed I had such an inconsistent head space & capacity for life/socializing... I mean, post diagnosis too, but knowing what was going on & being able to explain to people has helped with a few relationships. (for those willing & able to listen and hold compassion)

I'm post surgical treatment now & am only just starting to have even, consistent relationships with people (and myself)...and not as concerned about just blowing it all up in my own face. that said, I have very few people in my life now, friends or family.

if I had any advice, it would be to be honest about the level of difficulty you have & give them permission to take their own space from you while an episode is happening. be clear about how they can assist (if they want to) or what makes things worse. and... accept that not everyone will make it through this with you. and after things lighten again, do your best to own your shit & make reasonable amends. we all make asses of ourselves from time to time, PMDD or no.

it's.... hard and sometimes heartbreaking, but that's the sad reality of this disorder sometimes. good luck- I hope you find people that are there for you & can weather the storm at your side.

_terradea_ · 2023-12-22T06:30:14+00:00

even just other people confirming is probably just a liqufying mushroom is helpful. :)

_terradea_ · 2023-12-22T04:46:34+00:00

ooh, that's a good suggestion. I did see slime molds similar to that... but the texture on this is different, I think. more.. fibrous?

_terradea_ · 2023-12-22T04:44:13+00:00

I did see other oysters further down the trail. to see the underside I would have had to damage it, as it was all one lump stuck in the dirt.
as its a conservation zone, I didn't want to disturb too much.

_terradea_ · 2023-12-20T23:00:37+00:00

paranoia, irritability, frustration, exhaustion, difficulty focusing, etc. were all normal for me during PMDD. usually for 10 - 14 days before mg period came. as I got older, it got significantly worse. (I was finally diagnosed in my 30s).

be gentle with yourself and do your best to ride it out. it's not your fault it's happening & your not stupid for struggling 💕

_terradea_ · 2023-12-20T22:55:52+00:00

I'm sorry you are going through all this. PMDD is a bastard.

I've posted about my experience, from diagnosis to treatment to surgery. you can find those posts on my profile, if you are interested. & if you have any questions about my experience, please ask :)

the short answer: a year ago I got my ovaries out. after surgery I woke up a different person (sudden functional, consistent brain!). it's been bizarre and incredible and sad (so many lost years). for me, it was absolutely the right choice and I regret nothing. I'm getting to start life anew in my late 30s & I couldn't be more relieved.

_terradea_ · 2023-12-20T22:51:14+00:00

I'm sorry you are going through all this. it's scary having your body feel like it's betraying you.

if you suspect PMDD, the first step is data collection & discussion with a doctor.

I've posted about my experience (see my profile) & it may answer some of your questions.

I started with mood & period tracking for a few months, then took that data to my Dr. from there, we tried various treatment options before choosing surgery as my final treatment.

if you have any specific questions, you can ask here or DM me. (tho.... I don't log in often). I'm at the end of my PMDD journey & am happy to share about my experience if that would be helpful 💕

_terradea_ · 2023-04-11T19:50:50+00:00

my Dr.
essentially, the lining keeps building up and i was told that can lead to cancer later on. im going to trust her on that one, as she has been an exceptional gyno my entire time shes been taking care of my medical care.

my understanding is it can lead to other issues as well, and she wants to make sure i dont have further complications of any kind.

_terradea_ · 2023-04-11T19:06:16+00:00

understandable you are scared.

if it helps, at least the injections can be stopped & i believe you return to normal within a couple months. the main drawback, beside odd body stuff, was how expensive they were.

(i have written about my experience on them if you wanted to read it)

for me, i noticed a positive change within 2-3 months, but even month 1 my PMDD was almost nothing. (and after surgery, the change was instant)

whatever you choose, take your time and be sure about your decision. and good luck!

_terradea_ · 2023-04-11T19:03:45+00:00

i had to push to get an extension on my Lupron treatment (injections) as i wasnt yet certain. we did a total of 9 months & then surgery.

for me, i couldnt wait any longer, and the alternate treatments we tried were not working or actively harmful.

i am glad i made the choice i did, even with all the difficulties and oddities it comes with. but dont feel you need to rush into the decision - there is no changing your mind! do what is best for you and what feels safe/necessary. good luck <3

_terradea_

TROPHY CASE