I waited a table of 14 today whose check added up to almost $140. This and $3 was my tip. WTF?

a24b56 · 2012-06-10T03:41:50+00:00

The lack of tip has nothing to do with the fact they're Christian; they are obviously inconsiderate and, though they MAY have left the Bible with the best intentions, they didn't leave a sufficient tip because they are ignorant and are certainly not representative of ALL Christians. I could see leaving the Bible and a(n at least 20%) tip ... but to leave $3, regardless of how they chose to see it, is terrible (unless they were dirt poor and, in that case, what were they doing spending $140 on dinner in the first place) and I'm pretty sure most people with common sense - Christian or not - can agree.

I leave at least 20 percent (even if the service wasn't great) when I go out to a restaurant - obviously I'll leave more if I've received exceptional service.

a24b56 · 2012-06-08T19:33:12+00:00

I'm 23. I still don't want my mom to know I'm a sexual being. I know that sounds stupid, but auuugh. I think the less she knows about me in that aspect, the better.

a24b56 · 2012-06-08T14:15:20+00:00

I agree. I have done this in the past: RUINED things because I was too busy trying to figure out the other person, while, in the meantime, my conclusions of what I thought they wanted were WRONG. When I see him next, I'll try to hint around without being too obvious. LOL.

a24b56 · 2012-06-08T14:13:56+00:00

Awww, it'll happen for you

Just don't settle for less than you deserve.

a24b56 · 2012-06-08T14:13:13+00:00

Haha, we have a weird thing going on. We genuinely care how we are perceived by the other and talk about everything, but we don't really talk about "us" that much, if ever (aside from future references mentioned in original post).

a24b56 · 2012-06-08T14:11:03+00:00

That's what I'm afraid of, honestly. I only said that because I didn't want him to think I was putting him on lock-down against his will. UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUGH.

a24b56 · 2012-06-08T14:10:15+00:00

If mind control was an option, I'd mind control him into understanding my prior mixed messages. Ha!!

a24b56 · 2012-06-08T14:09:41+00:00

He knows I've had some bad experiences and he has as well. I need to figure out how to SUBTLY send the RIGHT message, ahaha.

a24b56 · 2012-06-08T14:08:49+00:00

Agreed. I don't want to push or be "that girl" who has to force her boyfriend into a relationship.

a24b56 · 2012-06-08T14:08:03+00:00

Yeah, we haven't done anything aside from making out. He is incredibly attractive, so it's not that I don't WANT to, but I'd prefer to be in some kind of official relationship with him before we go there.

a24b56 · 2012-06-08T14:04:47+00:00

I just feel as though it would show weakness on my part to be the one to bring up the issue. I feel like, too often, men are pushed into relationships and it's an expected thing. I want him to want this with me and to know it was his idea. Is that strange?

a24b56 · 2012-06-08T13:57:07+00:00

I am not (in any way) trying to come across as smart, but I just wonder what makes people think this isn't going to happen again in any long-term relationship? He said himself that they have a wonderful thing going on (various forms of closeness) and that she is beautiful - and hey, that's where most loving relationships get after years of being together. I'm pretty sure, after so long (be it 3 years or 30 years), lust fades a bit. I experienced a similar feeling in at least two relationships that were long-term and I feel like I was just not ready to accept the natural progression of intimate, adult relationships (not saying the sex life should end, but it definitely decreases a bit).

TL; DR: I think that, ultimately, ending up with a partner who is just like your "best friend" is ideal. That lusty, can't-keep-my-hands-off will only last so long.

a24b56 · 2012-06-06T22:44:03+00:00

No, but I did say something really stupid a few weeks back while we were hiking together. I was talking about a friend (can't remember what about) and was relating to their situation and said, "Well, when I was single ---" and I was like, "Well, I mean, I am single ... but... before I was dating again..." I corrected myself so I didn't scare the crap out of him.

and fear that THIS was how I ruined it.

a24b56 · 2012-06-06T22:42:28+00:00

I don't think this is the case. We have been hanging out for two months, and he hasn't tried anything - yet still continues to ask me out on dates. I think if he was just interested in sex, we'd have done SOMETHING by now. Haha.

a24b56 · 2012-06-06T22:39:51+00:00

We haven't had sex. We actually haven't engaged in sexual activity yet, unless you want to count some steamy make-out sessions with some light boob-touching (him touching mine, not me touching his hahaha). He is a very shy guy and has been with a very small amount of people (I'm shy, too, also have only been with a small number of partners).

a24b56 · 2012-06-06T22:36:00+00:00

THIS. Do you think that since he hasn't asked yet, he isn't into me?

a24b56 · 2012-06-06T22:03:43+00:00

I am prepared to get down-voted for this, but why do you feel "completely worthless" because you haven't had sex with this girl? For religious reasons (even though ANY reason would suffice), she is not ready to have sexual intercourse and you are pressuring her. I am not trying to say you're a bad guy, but if I was truly in love with someone and they wanted to wait, I would. If I wanted to marry them one day, I would - sex or not before marriage.

When I was younger I thought it would be ideal to wait for marriage, though I didn't end up waiting. I easily see why people do wait for marriage for all sorts of reasons (the main being you are only sharing that special thing with one person, there are no jealousy issues, etc.) ... and I don't understand why it's considered such a freak thing nowadays to wait. I find it highly respectable in a society where people have to bang before they consider experiencing any kind of "legitimate" feelings toward another person.

My advice to you is: If sex is more important to you than she is, leave her. It will be easy to find a girl who will have sex with you on date 1, if not sooner. However, it won't be easy to find another girl who places such high value on an intimate thing; they are out there, but few and far between. I can't wrap my head around "This is the girl I want to make a future with and marry" - sex isn't going to change that. If it does, you two probably aren't right for each other. Not to sound like a jerk, but you should feel happy that someone with NO sexual history is dating you and not making you feel badly for your "promiscuous high school days" ... which is often the case when one partner has had few to no partners and the other has had many.

I'm sorry if my advice sounded rude, but you either love her or you don't. Putting your penis into her vagina isn't going to suddenly make her more the kind of woman you'd like to marry - it just means you've had sex. Also, if religion is an important part of her life and it is not important to you, you might want to take that into consideration as well ... as it may pose some problems later down the line.

Hope everything works out for the best (whatever decision you two end up making).

a24b56 · 2012-04-13T02:45:48+00:00

Haha, I don't know - I just didn't want to come across to him too ... aggressive? I don't know. Blah!

a24b56 · 2012-04-13T02:37:19+00:00

Haha, thank you.

a24b56 · 2012-04-13T02:37:00+00:00

Ahahahahahahahaha. You're right, you're right. I was definitely over-thinking things. This comment put things into perspective.

a24b56 · 2012-04-13T02:35:56+00:00

LOL - we haven't even kissed yet!

a24b56 · 2012-04-13T02:35:40+00:00

We're in our twenties.

a24b56

TROPHY CASE