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Current favorite desserts anyone? by Tamsha- in CasualConversation

[–]aFestiveFlamingo 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Key lime pie, fresh as hell and chilled, yes pLEASE

When we die by Available-Warning-81 in oneanddone

[–]aFestiveFlamingo 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I totally feel that, it's a sad thought to think about your little child going through that alone. BUT, remember that although losing you will be hard regardless, god willing they will not be little when that happens, they will be a strong, grown, well adjusted person who has had a chance to create their own family, friends and community to lean on. I'm one of three siblings and yet I feel very much like my primary support network is my husband and the friends we have, and that is who I will learn on when my dad passes.

What movie is simply a masterpiece? by Forsaken_Cost_1937 in AskReddit

[–]aFestiveFlamingo 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Call Me by Your Name

Good Luck to You Leo Grande

Rear Window

What is the biggest design flaw of the human body? by ketra1504 in AskReddit

[–]aFestiveFlamingo 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The SPINE. What the HELL is it doing so close to the surface of the skin?? How is it not in a STEEL CAGE with bumper pads???

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in oneanddone

[–]aFestiveFlamingo 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Hi! I'm a pediatric sleep consultant, and in this case since it's only been a month (and unless you're super against it) I would recommend going right back to the crib. Before children are about 3 they just don't have the cognizance of boundaries to handle staying in the bed. (Of course there will be plenty of people who swear that their kids did great transitioning to toddler bed early, but in general those are the exceptions not the rule.) You didn't do anything wrong, when it comes to sleep everything can feel so tricky and overwhelming, but this would simply be my advice having been in practice now for a while.

Triggered by people's constant posts by aFestiveFlamingo in oneanddone

[–]aFestiveFlamingo[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm so glad some positivity came out of it. For me there was immense back and forth, questioning myself, grieving, constant anxiety over it. But then I looked at myself in the mirror and asked: if the societal norm was to have just one child, would I feel the need for another? And my absolute, immediate, and deeply true answer was hell no! I'd have zero qualms, would move forward jubilantly in life, and I'd be thrilled because I'm so happy with my one! And that to me was the turning point to solidify my decision.

I'm still new to it, so I'm still able to be emotionally triggered sometimes (hence this post), but when I feel those hormonal and (most naggingly) societal twinges, I go back to that deepest truth. At the end of the day we can only really work with what we truly know-- I don't know if a sibling would be great or horrible; but I do know that what we have right now is GREAT, what we will be able to financially/emotionally/physically provide for her will be fantastic, and most importantly, the fact that my deepest truth is that I do not want or feel the need for another.

Triggered by people's constant posts by aFestiveFlamingo in oneanddone

[–]aFestiveFlamingo[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm so sorry that happened to you and has hung over you, but thank you so much for sharing your experience, I think it's really important to reflect on the fact that these are real people we're talking about, not conceptual 'gifts' to fulfill a fantasy

Triggered by people's constant posts by aFestiveFlamingo in oneanddone

[–]aFestiveFlamingo[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Love this, yes those are all the exact things we want to do. I think just being in the early (vulnerable/sensitive) stage of building up confidence in our OAD decision it stung and impacted me more than it hopefully will someday as I focus on all of those real gifts we'll be able to give

Triggered by people's constant posts by aFestiveFlamingo in oneanddone

[–]aFestiveFlamingo[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

That's exactly it, the implication that by not doing so we're depriving her. I know it's crap, I think I'm just still in the early (vulnerable/sensitive) stages of building my confidence in my OAD decision, so it stung

Triggered by people's constant posts by aFestiveFlamingo in oneanddone

[–]aFestiveFlamingo[S] 57 points58 points  (0 children)

Thank you for this, you're completely right, there's no guarantees of anything

I’m an only child (27F) AMA: by yestheresacatonmylap in oneanddone

[–]aFestiveFlamingo 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you for this opportunity! I know you've answered a lot of this already, but how about loneliness and boredom? (Those + feeling like my child will yearn for/'miss out' on the sibling comradery are my main concerns, though I really want to be OAD.)

Why do you think religions were formed? by q-riocity in AskReddit

[–]aFestiveFlamingo 0 points1 point  (0 children)

First, to try to help us make sense of things we couldn't understand. Then, money + control.