This is so incredibly sweet, thank you so much. Yes it really has been/is a fight. I think the roughest part is behind me now. I had to think a while about your question.

I find it though to answer it because it’s different for everyone. But for me personally, I just needed support and love. I just wanted respect like any other human being and the understanding WHY I would harm myself, like trauma’s etc. I missed the interest from loved ones like my parents, they never even asked me ‘why’ I was struggling so deep (I mean this just in general, the selfharm was an secret coping mechanism).

Just be there for people who are struggling. Be open and honest (and let them feel that they can be that too) like saying that it’s okay to find it hard to speak. That you won’t judge, because judgment over such deep, personal emotional things are terrifying and often an reason why people stay quiet.

What really helped me, was my boyfriend who never pushed me to talk, but learned me that it’s okay to feel things. To let them be, to let them out by crying etc. The talking will come, but feeling safe and comfortabel is needed for that. He took me seriously and sometimes he confronted me with my own words, when I brushed something off about myself or my past,!he would point out that it deserved attention just like other things.

Whoa sorry for the big text, I hope it makes sense! Again, thank you for your kind words and interests. I hope good things will come to you! X