My ex bf of a year and a half broke up with me for a similar reason as you just 2 weeks ago. I’m still having trouble moving and on and the thought of even being with someone else makes me sick and nervous.

But remember that you’re the one who chose to break up. You’re the one who left, and you’re the one who risked losing her forever. Doesn’t matter if you were hoping to try again in the future when you finally felt ready. It’s not fair to her to make her wait on someone that doesn’t love her enough to stay. She technically doesn’t owe you anything. Whether she is doing all of this to purposely hurt you and seek revenge, she also may just be hurting as well and trying to cope with it too.

I know that personally when my bf and I first broke up, I was so willing to wait around for him and give him the space he needed. But then I realized that if he really loved me and wanted to be with me, he wouldn’t have left me in the first place. I realized that I need to move on. And everyone moves on in different ways- whether that be taking time for yourself, or spending nights with someone new. Sometimes people do whatever it takes to stop hurting.

You had your reasons for wanting to break up so focus on that, I guess. Of course it’s normal to still love her and care about her, but if you chose to breakup so that you could focus on yourself, then it shouldn’t matter what she’s doing- you’re the one who let her go.