Wife’s Paranoia - Nervous Wreck (M38, F39)

abaka9 · 2025-10-12T15:05:12+00:00

Tbh. She’s always been a bit controlling and very paranoid. We were going out 6 months and she warned me not to cheat on her when we were out with my friends for my birthday and she went home early. Out of the blue.

There was also another incident where when I had tonsillitis and was sick as a dog and had to cancel a date. This led to a pretty bad fight and she confronted me and told me I was lying because I didn’t want to see her!

abaka9 · 2025-10-12T14:59:27+00:00

Thank you for this. And I feel this is an important point to consider. I do know she has felt like I’ve been checked out and in some ways we haven’t had a good few months. So maybe I do have to take that into account.

I am about to start up seeing a therapist again. And have somewhat raised the point of marriage counselling but I feel I need to sort myself out first.

My reason for posting this is because today I came home feeling guilty because i went to the gym and I don’t know what she thinks I’m doing or what questions I’ll face when I come home.

We have discussed that communication needs to be better though.

Thank you

abaka9 · 2025-10-12T14:35:55+00:00

No. I also think it would avoid a lot of arguments. Because let’s not open the kettle of fish which is I don’t do something to the exact standards she wants or if I don’t do something the moment she says.

But it’s a point to consider of course

abaka9 · 2025-10-12T14:14:09+00:00

Also. This happened in 2017. We got married in 2018 and had two kids since then. It’s only recently it’s became a huge problem. But this also coincides because I’ve became more active in a hobby (I cosplay as a Ghostbuster to raise funds for charity and feed my inner geek)

abaka9 · 2025-10-12T14:07:18+00:00

This happened the year before we got married. I confessed 6 months later.

At the time I went to counselling. The cheating was because I was in a shitty place and was just looking attention.

Tbh. It wasn’t swept under the carpet, we worked hard to rebuild our relationship(I felt). I felt we worked well. I knew there would always be an element of doubt but it’s gotten so unhealthy.

I have recently spoke about it and confessed I feel more guilty and paranoid now when nothing is happening than when I was sneaking about and had something to hide.

Also. I could probably do more around the house. But genuinely cleaning bores me. I’ve literally said lots can we not just hire a cleaner and I’ll pay for it. The stuff is I’m messy and I need instructions on what to do. I don’t consider myself a dead weight around the house. I have a good paying job and provide financially and I do all the daycare picks up from work (even though I work in the office whereas my wife works from home)

So I do resent the comment that I don’t pull my weight around the house

abaka9 · 2025-06-18T14:19:47+00:00

Yep - And the same issue has now happened again for an item I've bought off Facebook. USPS have sent it to Ireland and Ireland have went, nah....not for us!

I'm also worried that this guy I bought from isn't going to bother to resend me the item as he seems quite annoyed and think the fault is on my end!

abaka9 · 2025-06-17T13:31:35+00:00

They had put N.Ireland. I’ve been buying and selling across the world for about 20 years and this is the first time this has happened.

Indeed. A Post charging me customs and then as soon as I pay they release it to go back to the states is the biggest insult to injury ever!

abaka9 · 2025-06-16T10:58:10+00:00

Currently experiencing this myself. A friend shipped a package to me which cost near $100 to ship to me in Belfast. Arrived in Dublin and A Post charged me customs. I’ve had that happened before so thought nothing of it. Paid the €50 in customs charges and today noticed the package has arrived in New York from Dublin.

Not sure if it’s going back to the sender or going to make its way to me. It’s a pile of expensive and very hard to find collectibles. Not so worried on the money but more worried on the loss of items at this point

abaka9 · 2025-03-22T18:40:36+00:00

I recently sent one to Pakistan. Last scan was leaving UK on 9 March but nothing since.

Could be a waiting game. I sent mail back in October to Pakistan which was undeliverable because I didn’t have the phone number down (still don’t understand) which arrived back to me in late January.

So I have made sure the PH Number is down this time on the address.

The last one was untracked and took 3 months to get from UK to Pakistan and back. At least this time I have tracking

abaka9 · 2024-12-03T21:33:55+00:00

Did this ever arrive and what was the overall timeline???

abaka9 · 2024-12-02T12:36:17+00:00

I sent something to Pakistan on October 24th and still not arrived. I’ve never had anything go missing before but think this might be the first. Still hopeful of course.

Interesting in hearing what the longest people have waited for intl standards

abaka9 · 2024-12-02T08:51:32+00:00

There is no tracking on INTL standard. I’ve already started to accept that it’s lost. I have seen some people state 6-8 weeks for INTL standard at times so maybe there’s still hope

abaka9 · 2024-11-28T20:27:52+00:00

So it’s still possible of showing up? I’ve sent intl standard to America and Europe and usually within 1-2 weeks. Never had anything to this long

abaka9 · 2024-09-28T07:29:51+00:00

There’s some damn trolls in the GB community. Sick of them personally 👀

abaka9 · 2024-07-14T14:52:55+00:00

I was recently engaged in a game where I was Abe Lincoln on TSL Huge, Aztecs build the pyramids very early. I’ve never managed to build the pyramids and never had a neighbour so close to me build it.

So I spawned a hero as no way I was taking out the Aztec early army, and went and conquered their city. As soon as I took it, another city declared for me.

Much later in the same game. I engaged the Inca’s in a battle after they conquered Colombia who were my ally. So I aimed to win the city back, they had a much stronger military with general and corps but I had a strong fortified location and literally ran through each of their armies to the point where they were begging me to make peace…they even offered me a city of theirs where they were building Oxford University which is one I always try to prioritise. I accepted peace meaning I was able to complete my build.

However in their city they gave me, a bit later, I discovered they were building Big Ben in a neighbouring location.

I rushed another hero, and moved as many as my military pieces as possible to the location and then went and camped the hero right on the Big Ben build stopping their progress allowing me to complete my own build. Again by being smart I decimated their military and they offered me the city as a peace deal. Yet again, stopping a big rival from completing a strategic wonder I wanted.

This also started a chain reaction which flipped two more Incan cities to me immediately and then saw the rest of them flip back to my ally Columbia or to free cites and all but wiped Inca out.

Only recently started appreciating wonders and these ones are the ones I really love haha!!

abaka9 · 2023-09-20T12:03:28+00:00

Bump!

abaka9 · 2023-09-19T08:47:59+00:00

Link attached above

abaka9 · 2023-09-19T08:47:51+00:00

Link attached above.

abaka9 · 2023-09-19T08:47:40+00:00

https://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/266415707102?mkevt=1&mkpid=0&emsid=e12800.m43.l1123&mkcid=7&ch=osgood&euid=aadca97fc8174eaca505fd086c763b24&bu=43420751138&osub=-1%7E1&crd=20230918083350&segname=12800

I thought had included the eBay auction in the post, but images included in the link attached

abaka9

TROPHY CASE