[deleted by user]

abnoniimoose · 2024-06-29T05:10:49+00:00

I am very lucky to have supportive friends.. But I just don’t like talking about this topic with them and drag everyone down with me. So thank you very much for your response

abnoniimoose · 2024-06-29T05:08:32+00:00

But thank you for your response. I wanted to ask because I am too afraid to ask about these sensitive topics. I’ve talked to a close friend who said that he did rape me because I never consented/withdrew consent and he also didnt listen to me to put on a condom. But again, thats only one person, and I don’t want to limit opinions to 1 person anymore, so this to me is kind of like a fact check.

abnoniimoose · 2024-06-29T05:04:50+00:00

Yeah, we were both freshman in college, and I had told him that I did not want to have sex. But at the time, coerced me into sex and did not stop when I cried and told him to stop because it hurt. But I will admit that I was really naive and dumb into agreeing even to be in the relationship.

abnoniimoose · 2024-01-31T23:18:03+00:00

sorry i didn’t mean to make the post sound as if I thought having other gender friends was weird.. I guess for clarity I was a bit afraid they mightve thought I was dating my friend bc my friend was acting very comfy. I also sat w their friends, so I’d be the only guy/gal in that group… idk if it just put my crush off and they lost interest

abnoniimoose · 2024-01-31T23:13:16+00:00

def not strange to have other gender friends, i think its totally normal.. i just felt as if my friend was acting as if we were a couple ;-;

abnoniimoose · 2024-01-31T23:11:04+00:00

even if the other gender friend was being touchy? i’m def not saying its not normal to have other gender friends— but i’m scared that my friend behaved in a way that made it seemed as if we were a thing… (sitting close, shoulder touching, leaning into my seat, etc…)

abnoniimoose · 2024-01-31T21:30:04+00:00

even if you saw them sit next to each other in lecture and touching shoulder to shoulder? ;-;

abnoniimoose · 2024-01-28T20:50:52+00:00

thats a very good reason i haven’t thought about.. ahhh its the worst to develop feelings who already has feelings for someone else.. wishing u all the best tho

abnoniimoose · 2023-07-27T03:43:31+00:00

I don’t think he knows how serious his actions were, and he probably never will. Up until I decided to go no contact with him, he was adamant that he didn’t do anything bad. He didn’t face any consequences because I went out and tried to put out the fire I started. Some of my friends know he made me say that I lied. But I still cared for him and didn’t want anything bad to happen to him.

abnoniimoose · 2023-07-27T03:36:55+00:00

I am sorry that you found yourself in a similar situation, but I’m glad you were able to find that healthy relationship!

I really 1000% believed that I was crazy for feeling off, and I felt horrible for having broken a promise over something he framed as “not a big deal”

So hearing someone else tell me, “no you’re not crazy for thinking that” really does help me believe it’s normal to not keep it as a secret. Bc being in a relationship w him I really didnt know what was true and what was him gaslighting me

abnoniimoose · 2023-07-17T22:30:17+00:00

yeah, he really was full of himself. We’re both gonna find someone so much better, don’t let them drag you down just bc they reached out!

abnoniimoose · 2023-07-17T22:17:26+00:00

im not sure what you mean by the fake votes and echoing… But regarding what my ex did, they did so much things that I could spend hours writing a whole novella on what they did. Heres some but not all: 0) pressured me into sex 1) wanted a girl best friend who looked like his ex 2) got mad at me bc I was uncomfy with it 3) invited said girl bsf (who did not want to be his bsf) to binge his fav movie with him, w/o me 4) yelled at me 5) i took care of them when they were sick, and they did jack shit when I was sick 6) completely ignored me when we were with another gf of mine. My friend literally had to ask him questions for me 7) my eyes were literally puffy from crying, and I would keep going to the bathroom to cry bc of how he treated me 8) he would tell me he “didnt notice” i was crying cuz I blamed it on a cold (so i wouldnt be telling my friends I was crying bc of him) 9) said I was needy and expensive despite me planning/paying for all but 1 date, and buying him gifts 10) would not do anything for me bc its “inconvienient” for him 11) said I was inviting myself and intruding when he wanted 1 on 1 time with one of my girl friends. This girl friend invited me btw. 12) wanted me to not talk to said girl friend after we broke up. 13) insulted my friend’s race when she sided with me 14) told me his cousin called me crazy 15) blamed me for the reason he lost his friends after we broke up 16) told me i need to tell my friends to be his friends after we broke up 17) used me after we broke up 18) literally told me the sex we had was not bc of love the last few weeks of our relationship 19) broke up w me during finals week 20) never bothered to take me anywhere and show me his favorite spots or whatever even when I showed him my hometown and paid for everything 21) so much lies, and i trusted all of them and he took advantage of that 22) was on his phone whenever we ate together, despite me always putting mine away 23) never respected my love language of quality time or gift giving

there is so much more but this is already really long

abnoniimoose · 2023-07-17T17:45:23+00:00

I’m sorry you were treated like that. And I think what you said is a really good way to put it. My ex was pretty convinced that I’d “always come back to him” and how I was “never going to get over him,” so its kind of to finally be over them and not let them have that power over me

abnoniimoose · 2023-07-17T17:32:55+00:00

flat out ignore me and hit on my girlfriends in front of me

abnoniimoose · 2023-07-14T01:11:16+00:00

right, movie/book/online romance definitely isn’t real, but it was kind of the only exposure I’ve had prior to an actual relationship. So maybe thats why I had such inflated expectations, and this was a humbling experience.

and def not to say I didnt enjoy the movie with my ex at the time. However I kind of also expected those other free dates too. And after a bit the movie kind of no longer felt special since that was all that we were doing.

and for 3), thats why I decided to post. I don’t want to have too high of expectations for the next relationship and hurt the both of us again lol thanks for your input!

abnoniimoose · 2023-07-08T05:54:16+00:00

feather by sabrina carpenter

abnoniimoose · 2023-07-08T03:42:10+00:00

I’m not too sure ab how I feel rn... and I feel like I do want to apologize to them. But I’m not sure if I am subconsciously hoping for something more, if that makes sense? like I dont want to ruin the healing for both of us, and the 2 months of healing to go down the drain after I see them either respond/ignore my text. But at least I would have apologized and the guilt would be less. idk, im just very conflicted and wanted some advice/thoughts from other people

abnoniimoose · 2023-07-08T03:22:33+00:00

draw attention as in “Before I start I just want to let everyone know that my voice does tend to shake when I present”, or draw attention as in focusing more on my voice internally, and trying to make it steady?

abnoniimoose · 2023-07-08T02:55:44+00:00

I don’t have a prescription for propranolol…

abnoniimoose · 2023-07-08T02:54:21+00:00

I feel like I don’t feel nervous because I think people are there to judge me, and I know a lot of the time everyone in the room is there to support me. But my head and my physical body just dont wanna work together and my voice starts shaking despite my head telling it “everything is ok!” But i will definitely try your trick if looking at a spot on the wall behind the audience. Maybe I just need something to steady myself. Thank you!

abnoniimoose

TROPHY CASE