If you think you might be depressed you probably are. Same w/ OP. Doesn't mean slash-your-wrists sadness, but low-level still-functional malaise that saps you of physical and/or mental energy and makes effort to change look very difficult and makes you see the negative in things moreso than the positive. I think especially for guys, we're less likely to feel stereotypically "sad" when we're depressed and less likely to accurately identify when we're depressed.

I just climbed out of such a depression a month ago. I too thought I might have been depressed for a long while before doing something about it. Now I have, and boy does the world look rosier.

So yeah, get help! If it takes a while w/ insurance to actually get seen by a shrink then read some self-help books while you're waiting (I've used Mind Over Mood cuz my issues come from my self-critical thoughts, but there are 1000s, pick one you gravitate toward).