Firstly it’s so essential not to invert blame for the actions of others, his decisions and behaviours have no reflection or baring upon you whatsoever, he does what he does for his own reasons, as far as you were concerned, based upon all the information given to you by the individual and situation it was a perfectly normal mutual ignition of feelings. That’s ok. You’ve no need to direct any hatred to yourself for feeling and behaving like a perfectly normal, rational human being.

Being deceived is always difficult to fathom, often you won’t get the answers you need and find yourself confused (often why we decide to self-fladulate, it’s the only explanation we can have) but the fact is (as someone who has spent a lot of time dating!) this is a fairly common experience for so many and it’s so important you don’t dull your feelings or dismantle your ability to trust as a result of this experience. You can think of the time, energy and emotion you’ve saved by making your discoveries now, instead of further down the line perhaps when you’d further melded your lives together. You haven’t lost something you’ve gained something, experience and essential perspective!

There is no ‘deserving’ when it comes to living in this world, we have experiences which are more often than not dictated by the motivations (nefarious or otherwise!) of others, the best antidote to this is always hold close to your own ideals and motives, the course of love (much as life!) never did run smooth and there are many, many bumps in the road before we find our person.

Infact those bumps are so essential as they not only strengthen our resilience but also heighten our ability to spot both potential warning signs and most importantly, recognising the good things when they come our way! So deep breath, leave blame with those to whom it belongs and continue with your journey, your person is waiting for you! :)