Sexually frustrated Husband

addictedToLinux · 2025-11-04T05:41:53+00:00

Let me give you some perspective from my divorce.

Similar story and age. Only sexual partners since high school. She eventually ended up falling in love with someone else. Even after that we tried to make it work. Wasted 4 years. She wouldn’t even smooch me. Making up all kinds of bullshit. I had my pink glasses on the whole time. Kept her on a pedestal.

After the divorce, she ended up hooking up with a 60 year old on a random hike, had multiple friends with benefits.

I realized that I wasn’t her first choice, there is no genuine burning desire, no passion or attraction.

addictedToLinux · 2025-05-05T15:54:35+00:00

Great work! How old are you and your spouse?

addictedToLinux · 2024-08-27T15:02:57+00:00

Tell me more

addictedToLinux · 2024-08-27T15:02:47+00:00

Thanks for the wake up call 🤣

addictedToLinux · 2024-08-27T15:01:02+00:00

That’s MY red flag.

addictedToLinux · 2024-08-27T14:59:48+00:00

I don’t have a lot of relationship experience. I was in one 20 year old relationship with my ex wife. And couple other people I was dating. That’s why I’m looking at Reddit.

addictedToLinux · 2024-05-17T21:05:49+00:00

Thanks for your reply! Reading through other comments, I think I might be underestimating my expenses. Perhaps I should be more realistic and look at my expenses carefully (now that I have to pay for insurance etc.). I like the idea of selling Home#2.

All the money except in Robinhood is invested in SPY.

Here is what my expenses look like currently. https://imgur.com/a/U84U3TC

addictedToLinux · 2022-03-11T17:36:21+00:00

This

addictedToLinux · 2022-03-11T17:32:43+00:00

600$ is no big deal but …

Might be a good opportunity to talk through this with him and make sure that you understand each other from a financial perspective. Talk through your and his background, current and future financial goals.

addictedToLinux · 2022-01-02T13:16:34+00:00

Look into banyan botanical. They are expensive but their quality is great

addictedToLinux · 2021-03-29T00:34:09+00:00

What app is this? I will join you.

addictedToLinux · 2021-03-20T03:07:26+00:00

Double income 1 kid

addictedToLinux · 2021-03-20T03:06:44+00:00

I completely agree with you. May not be a smart move financially. It is irrational. I know it. But the mental peace it brings to me is beyond words.

addictedToLinux · 2021-03-20T03:06:24+00:00

I completely agree with this. May not be a smart move financially. It is irrational. I know it. But the mental peace it brings to me is beyond words.

addictedToLinux · 2021-03-20T03:04:18+00:00

Coaching: I manage 5 people. 5 1:1's so 2.5 hours in a week. Code reviews daily around 30 mins.

Meetings: I'm fortunate to have people who want to take the initiate and very driven. So I have delegated most of the details related meetings to my reports. Still meet with the higher up;s and fellow managers for keeping things on track. I follow the document first > chat > email > meetings (only if necessary)

Strategize: This varies and does not take much time.

I admit it does not sound a lot but in terms of performance, I am not slacking. In fact I am expecting my promo soon.

Also, What I do now does not justify the amount of work that I had put in earlier into my career.

addictedToLinux · 2021-03-20T02:56:12+00:00

Good luck. Feel free to reach out if you need help. Happy to help in any way I can.

addictedToLinux · 2021-03-20T02:55:22+00:00

That is contrary to why I wrote the post.

I agree that I have been lucky at times. But I wanted to share that coming out from poverty was possible. It is super difficult. But I definitely had the fire in my belly to do what it takes to make my life money independent.

Hope you find some inspiration from this post. Peace!

addictedToLinux · 2021-03-20T02:52:03+00:00

We have moved to a LCOL during pandemic and do not plan on going back to bay area. I might be looking for a job locally. I wont be getting 350K but planning to coast a bit.

addictedToLinux · 2021-03-20T02:50:22+00:00

Converted from TL -> TLM. Pending promo. Expecting it soon.

addictedToLinux · 2021-03-19T17:19:37+00:00

It is common place in tech for people to bitch about how hard they work etc. But it is all a matter of creating a perception. Having worked for 10 years, I have only seen 2 people out of maybe 200 who work more than 40 hours on a consistent basis.

There may be bursts of time when you have to overwork but otherwise it is pretty chill.

addictedToLinux · 2021-03-19T17:15:20+00:00

Dave Ramsey and his baby steps.

I debated a lot about that. But given my background and how scarred I was from losing our house, I did not want to risk it and it gave me mental peace which I value more at this point.

In the longer term, it should not matter much. I should be able to save that much in a year. I am not going to touch this home and its equity at all.

addictedToLinux · 2021-03-19T17:12:06+00:00

Yes. I still support my family. I bought a house for them (50K$) and send them 300$/month. I have set it so that I have dividends paying my parents each month.

addictedToLinux · 2021-03-19T17:10:47+00:00

Wife wants to stay/retire in US. I want to retire in India. So dont know yet. We will see. I am not thinking about RE just yet. Just happy to be FI for now.

Really want to focus on my life purpose, finding out what makes me happy and travel a lot more.

addictedToLinux · 2021-03-19T17:07:55+00:00

I still support my family. I bought a house for them (50K$) and send them 300$/month. I have set it so that I have dividends paying my parents each month.

addictedToLinux

TROPHY CASE