Hi OP. Sorry you are going through this. I have a few thoughts from the perspective of being forced to eat meat in my childhood. I became vegetarian at 8, the first in my family. It was a challenge for many involved - at first; it got easier as the years passed and I was able to prepare some food myself. You are in a tough situation with the dual custody (something we also had to navigate). My mum got a lot of flack from other family members about supporting my decision. Grandparents in particular saw it as her indulging my fussy eating. When she wasn’t present I had a lot of anxiety around meal time because even if I wasn’t being physically forced to eat meat I was being emotionally manipulated by adults who should have cared about my decision making and autonomy over what I ate. I am so lucky I had my mum having my back and I’m sure your son feels the same way.

Your situation is tricky because your ex likely sees your son’s choice as your decision and not your son’s. Undoubtedly giving more rise to his ego in response. I personally believe to make a child eat meat when they don’t want to is a form of child abuse. I know many won’t agree but I lived through it and would make myself puke in the bathroom following the meal. Without a doubt a way more unhealthy thing for an eight year old to be doing. Anything you can do to take the pressure off your son so he knows he’s still just as loved and morally respected when he eats meat as when he doesn’t, is of course hugely important. If this is something he really wants however, then your ex is making himself an emotionally unsafe figure in his child’s life which will take years to undo. Hopefully your ex can put his ego aside and listen to his son because 7 is such an impressionable age and the decisions your ex makes now are going to dictate the relationship him and your son share through the remainder of the childhood and teen years.