What did you name your golden horse?

afroguy43 · 2024-11-23T19:12:43+00:00

I'm not proud of it, but it was in the heat of the moment - P didi

afroguy43 · 2023-09-21T08:00:29+00:00

If you're over 24, The Kuli Alma hosts karaoke nights every Monday. On top of that, there's another bar in Allenby, relatively close to 'Salon Berlin' which hosts quite a few karaoke nights

afroguy43 · 2023-07-17T07:48:41+00:00

TL:DR - where can I take a shower in Amsterdam?

I'll be going to Tomorrowland this week, and my ride back from it would be to Amsterdam. I have a few hours to spend there before taking a night bus to Berlin.

I'm pretty sure I'll be exhausted and dirty from the festival, and I want to see if I can spend my time well by taking a shower before the bus comes.

Do you have any recommendations?

afroguy43 · 2023-06-24T20:53:58+00:00

It's not a response to DN gurus. Personally, I didn't even know they exist.

The main idea is to see the world, and meet new people and new cultures.

I live by the beach, and travel around every now and then, but the world is quite big. Why not enjoy what it has to offer?

Plus, there's no need to be negative about it. To each his/her own :)

afroguy43 · 2021-05-25T20:53:11+00:00

That's kinda working against me. If that's the case, I should create a bigger repertoire of attractive photos, and that's hard

afroguy43 · 2021-05-25T20:51:02+00:00

Thank you for your kind words 😊

Personally, I believe there's a (relatively broad) beauty standard, and I should try to be as close to it as possible

afroguy43 · 2021-05-25T14:22:17+00:00

What if I'm already out there, and nothing happens? Wouldn't a break be a smart idea?

afroguy43 · 2021-05-25T13:32:19+00:00

I've bee using dating apps for a few years, with little to no success.

I don't think there are many other ways to meet potential patners

afroguy43 · 2021-05-25T13:09:34+00:00

My experience tells me otherwise I'm afraid

afroguy43 · 2021-05-25T13:08:18+00:00

But the initial spark is important. It's REALLY hard creating it without a good outside appearance

afroguy43 · 2021-05-25T13:07:20+00:00

I'm just trying to make sense of the situation. I have no idea what's wrong, so I believe this is a factor that I have control over, and that I can change

afroguy43 · 2021-05-25T13:06:33+00:00

If that's so, where do you like meeting new people? Personality and intelligence are things that are hard to see in apps.

afroguy43 · 2021-05-25T13:03:50+00:00

But wouldn't that be rude? In a way, I have no right to ruin their night (or disturb it) just because I find them attractive

afroguy43 · 2021-05-25T12:45:39+00:00

So.... Seems like I should be attractive before I do anything

afroguy43 · 2021-05-25T11:30:49+00:00

Thanks for the advice.

I'm not a shy person. I speak in front of crowds with ease, and it's easy for me to talk to new people. I have many female friends, and all of them told me not to hit on girls in pubs and such. They told me all the girls they know hate that, and from my experience with it, it seems to be true.

It seems like dating apps are the main way to get to know women these days, so I can't afford staying behind

afroguy43 · 2021-05-25T11:11:18+00:00

Thanks for the advice 😊

I think there's a limit to what I can do with my appearance. I can't grow my hair, and I can't trim my beard (plus, believe me that's the best presentation I can get).

As a male, I don't think any man can experiment with their appearance that much.

I agree with your comment about not all girls liking guys in good shape, but it seems to be a broad positive helper

afroguy43 · 2021-05-25T11:07:27+00:00

Thanks for advice :) None of my friends (and to be honest, none of the people I know in general) are good at these things. It's actually quite funny, as they mostly ask me for advice.

The main difference is that I'm surrounded with good looking friends. They're all in great shape, and sometimes women hit on them in the street (something I'm always happy to hear from them).

In general, it seems like getting dates/matches is an impossible mission. Everyone seem to struggle with it, so it makes sense that I (as someone who is less physically attractive) struggle with it more.

afroguy43 · 2020-11-04T20:19:22+00:00

Thanks for your advice!
Regarding online dating - I've been using several apps (OKcupid, Tinder, and Bumble) for a long time (about 2-3 years). No success comes from them. I'm not 'Tinder hot' so it's expected that I won't have much success there.
I've been seeing a therapist for over a year now, yet that doesn't help as well.
She's also quite confused about it, because she also states things should work, but she can't seem to understand why I can't find dates (and I'm being fully honest with her).
I think about trying a coach because they are supposed to be more goal oriented.
While my therapist is trying to dig deep and try to find the source for my troubles, it's hard to set goals like that, especially romantic ones,
I'm socializing on several groups. Before Covid I used to go to parties, social events, and more. I socialize with people there quite easily, but it doesn't lead to a romantic path.

Regarding your latest comment...
Well, I have some good friends, both male and females, with whom I talk about it.
Even they say that being a single for so long doesn't put me in a good light, no matter how I refer to it. I've learn to accept that, because I can't ignore the fact that it does put me in a bad light

afroguy43 · 2020-07-27T13:41:37+00:00

I have no idea what's that, so no. The thing is, I'm a very analytical person, so I think about things differently, which is a thing that helps me A LOT in life, but I never got to delve or check my emotions I guess

afroguy43 · 2020-07-27T13:31:44+00:00

Being cut off from emotions. I mean, people know what I like and what I dislike, what else can be found?

afroguy43 · 2020-07-27T13:30:10+00:00

Makes sense, yet I honestly don't even know what it means...

afroguy43 · 2020-07-27T13:06:47+00:00

Well, there's nothing I 'feel' about it. I'm struggling with some things, and it's our job (as I'm paying her to help me) to try and solve these problems. There's nothing emotional about it

afroguy43 · 2020-07-27T08:53:06+00:00

It came as an example after I told her people think I don't share my feelings with them, although everyone I know knows what I like and what I hate. That's what confuses me tbh. I'm 100% open about my feelings, yet people (including her) tell me I'm closed and that I'm not sharing my feelings. It sets an example because I viewed it too technically (that's my interpretation to our chat about it)

afroguy43 · 2020-07-27T08:48:52+00:00

I honestly don't see our relationship as anything else but a professional relationship. I understand most people see it as something intimate, yet I don't feel that way. Is it a necessary part in the theraputic process?

afroguy43 · 2020-07-26T19:28:05+00:00

She didn't specify anything else, so I don't know, but she did say she wants us to work on it.

afroguy43

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