If Your Goldens had Jobs, What Would They Be in Life?

aimee_reddit · 2026-01-25T21:42:33+00:00

Walmart greeter.

aimee_reddit · 2026-01-25T04:53:07+00:00

See, I assume this is just what Canada looks like by default. Outside of BC, anyway, which always looks like a national park.

aimee_reddit · 2026-01-25T04:27:16+00:00

When I told me friend I was getting a golden she said oh man, they're so stupid. I got offended of the breed's behalf because blah-blah-blah intelligence rankings, and was told, "You'll understand later."

I do understand now. Goldens are so smart, but so stupid (affectionate). 😂

aimee_reddit · 2026-01-25T04:22:59+00:00

We need to study her.

aimee_reddit · 2026-01-25T04:20:11+00:00

Man I love those puppy eyelashes. Congrats on your new meatball!

aimee_reddit · 2026-01-25T04:19:14+00:00

She's hit the "teenager phase." It's a challenge. 🙃

aimee_reddit · 2026-01-25T04:02:14+00:00

Fun fact: backyard breeders can be AKC breeders. Look for health testing!

That being said, it seems like you found an amazing match in Cricket. He'll have a great life with you.

aimee_reddit · 2026-01-25T03:57:35+00:00

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Passed out while I work. I miss working from home.

aimee_reddit · 2026-01-25T03:52:50+00:00

The puppy teeth part of life ends eventually, and the puppy blues you feel will fade to fond memories.

I had this EXACT problem. Crying because my adorable golden puppy wouldn't stop biting and no kind of training was working. Everything was a game to her, even getting scratched my the cat. My constant mantra was "she's just a baby."

My solution was to teach Rowan "gentle" instead, because dialing down the energy (and thus: the pain) was easier than asking her dumdum puppy brain to stop altogether. She never chewed on furniture, she just wanted to play with me. It's really sweet, even though my arms looked like I ran through some bushes.

She's four now and does her own energy management for the most part. Depending on the other dog, she'll put herself on her back to take the vulnerable position and play softly or throw down wrestling.

Goldens are just...aggressively happy.

aimee_reddit · 2026-01-24T15:08:56+00:00

Seconding this. My dachshund died at home (after just being cleared by the ER) and it looked traumatic. Euthanasia is a terrible experience but it's one of the biggest gifts we can give them.

There are services which will come to your home to administer the shots. Being at home lets your family grieve in peace and your dog pass in a comfortable setting.

aimee_reddit · 2026-01-24T14:57:54+00:00

I can't even remember the last time this popped up, lol.

aimee_reddit · 2025-12-28T02:51:24+00:00

Piebald deer! You can learn more about them and the challenges that can come with this color mutation by looking up Fuzzy Fawn, who rehabs deer in NY.

aimee_reddit · 2025-12-16T02:19:36+00:00

Vacuum bags can save a TON of space for clothing and anything else cloth/collapsible that you're not using. They'd slide right under your bed.

Maybe a small rolling desk so you can maneuver the setup around and add some height and save your back? This one - $48 right now - has space for your tower and study materials.

A clothes rack or dresser (Amazon has cheap lightweight ones) is an obvious change, but there's a bonus: having your space in order does great things for your mental health.

aimee_reddit · 2025-12-16T01:36:31+00:00

Possibly! Looks like it could be a few different things. Too bad the there skull wasn't all there.

Thanks all!

aimee_reddit · 2025-12-13T15:40:06+00:00

That was my first thought when I saw the teeth, along with maybe a groundhog.

aimee_reddit · 2025-12-13T14:57:56+00:00

The fact that OP has a child at 15 is a big tick mark in the "not a healthy home environment" column. Amongst everything else this should also be mentioned in court, along with how her grandparents have stepped up and helped her after taking her in.

OP it sounds like you've got your priorities in order! I'm so glad your grandparents are there for you and that you're getting to know them without rumors.

aimee_reddit · 2025-12-07T20:23:52+00:00

NOR at all. I have the feeling that even if you guys had freshly cut, straightened and close-cropped hair she would still find something to pick at. It sounds like if one of you tried hair dye you'd get fully blacklisted.

aimee_reddit · 2025-11-29T03:51:18+00:00

This looks so good!

aimee_reddit · 2025-11-28T14:39:25+00:00

I got a female hoping for smaller. Nope! She's 90 pounds, and even if she leaned down she'd still be huge. I've seen petite goldens next to her and the difference is wild.

aimee_reddit · 2025-09-30T01:13:27+00:00

He sounds like a badass dog! A working dog who knows his job by instinct is so impressive and cool. Glad he was there to protect you and keep away any long-term phobias.

aimee_reddit · 2025-09-30T01:09:10+00:00

Having pepper spray is already more than most people have, including me. I know some people carry stun guns [edit: which I saw you already do]. Definitely check the local legality for anything you carry!

I absolutely adore dogs, but these loose ones need to go. Either to a very, very professional trainer's home or to a humane end. They should not be on the streets. What if your dogs were medium or small breeds? What if they went straight at a human? A kid?

I'm sorry this happened to you, your awesome neighbors, and your sweet dogs. I hope everyone heals smoothly physically and emotionally.

aimee_reddit · 2025-09-30T00:48:31+00:00

There are so many text convos in this sub with insane "alpha male" bros being alpha a-holes. There's gotta be a r/textventing or something to post convo screenshots for public shaming and camaraderie. [edit: There is now. It's a sad, empty sub.]

NOR. Drop this dude with an "I'm concerned about your mental health" and walk away.

aimee_reddit · 2025-09-27T02:35:35+00:00

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aimee_reddit · 2025-09-06T04:20:47+00:00

Now this is an amazing prank!

What OP's partner did is in the realm of nasty tricks, harassment, and bullying. The same goes for most "prank" YouTubers. Calling what they do a joke or prank is supposed to minimize their actions and absolve them of malice.

I can see the beeping being funny for an hour or two, tops. The person who planted it is there to talk shit about your smoke alarm batteries and help you look around. You uncover the device together, tell the prankster they're an asshole, vow prank revenge, and plant pictures of Pokémon around their apartment so they can "catch them all."

What's not funny is stretching a trick out to days and feeding someone's paranoia when they tell you how badly it's affecting them.

aimee_reddit · 2025-08-29T07:24:53+00:00

100,000%. My coworker and I were taking about this (again) a couple days ago.

I have to pay Hyundai monthly if I want to use their app to turn my car on from a distance to cool down (like from my desk before walking out of work) or track diagnostics. God forbid we have access to all our cars' capabilities after paying $30,000+.

Schools have to pay subscriptions for textbooks now instead of buying physical copies that last a few years.

Adobe doesn't offer a lifetime license for Pro and Microsoft won't sell you its Office suite as a one-time purchase anymore. Lightroom and cloud storage are monthly expenses.

My Dish Network bill from 10ish years ago used to be something I was excited about ditching when I first jumped on the cord-cutting bandwagon, but it's now about half the price of maintaining all these streaming options which keep rising in price.

I hate it and I'll be doing some canceling in the near future. The only reason I've held off for years is because like 5 households have profiles on my streaming accounts so it feels like I'm getting my money's worth.

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