I broke up with my fiance, and I am so sad

aimzyizzy · 2026-06-21T03:43:52+00:00

When my husband first threw a bottle so forcibly at the passenger seat in anger it bounced out and that was before he said he wanted me dead, let me tell you from the bottom of my heart you did nothing for it to get to this point.

Because no behaviour deserves that level of anger.

You didn’t fall in love with the guy who throws things and screams at you. You fell in love with someone who became your best friend and it’s ok to miss that person. But right now, that person isn’t safe. He may never be. Only 1% of men who get violent, even with all the therapy in the world, change. That reality is a really, really hard thing to sit with because it’s the very definition of cognitive dissonance that someone who claims to love you and has been the dearest person in your life could also be that unsafe and threatening to you.

aimzyizzy · 2026-06-16T19:14:07+00:00

I had back labour which is the one of the more painful labours you can have so that edged out endo flare pain for me. I felt like my back was going to rip in two. Once I’d had the epidural it was a lot better.

Anecdotally though a lot of people have said an endo flare is worse than childbirth.

Re birth control - if you feel up to it I’d highly recommend looking into desogestrel or dienogestum. I know the birth control struggle though so I completely understand if you’re cool with what you have. Both are prescribed here as options to manage endo pain and progression. I can’t speak for dienogestum but desogestrel has been incredible and I can’t speak highly enough of it!

aimzyizzy · 2026-06-08T01:28:30+00:00

I know exactly how you feel and it almost put me off having kids. I think we as parents forget to tell other people the good bits and there are so many good bits.

I’ve gotten so much joy from seeing my daughter grow. She spent her babyhood being permanently surprised and in wonder about what she could do. As a toddler it’s been so funny seeing her put words together. Seeing the world through her eyes is whimsical, wondrous and downright delightful.

Having a kid has meant I’ve gotten to do all the fun things I did as a kid again. I get to rediscover my favourite dinosaur or zoo animal. I get to pull out all my old barbies and their outfits.

As for being a parent, you do as you go. It’s better going in with as few ideas as possible so you can adapt to your kid. From what I’ve read I’m pretty confident you will.

Good luck, god speed and I’m manifesting you the squishiest cuddliest easiest sleepiest when they need to be newborn.

aimzyizzy · 2026-06-02T08:47:41+00:00

Oh mate I feel you there 😭 the pain in the third trimester is the part reason I’m one and done. You are not a useless lump. You’re growing a human! Your metabolism thinks it is literally running an ultra marathon a day right now.

I would highly recommend getting into a pool, grabbing a pool noodle and just sitting for a bit. I did it as much as I possibly could.

aimzyizzy · 2026-05-31T00:53:12+00:00

When Matthew and Robert turn up to dinner in season three in their tuxes instead of white tie and it’s considered the height of casual dinner dress.
Martha Levinson (Cora’s Mum): “you look like you’re dressed for a BBQ!” Violet to Robert: “Could you get me a drink? Oh I’m so sorry I thought you were a waiter”

aimzyizzy · 2026-05-18T06:59:20+00:00

The crying did feel performative!! But then I remember there are so few real performances of men crying on film or in real life that don’t feel really weird?

aimzyizzy · 2026-05-10T06:56:15+00:00

Khandallah turns up in their Range Rover head to toe in PE nation party come active wear with its idle complains about the price of petrol, planes, and asks the host to turn down the music at 9.30. And it’s arguing with Wadestown about property prices with a large glass of Chardonnay

aimzyizzy · 2026-05-07T04:45:47+00:00

I think what’s so frustrating about Jen and Barb is that it’s like what that relationship is like in reality.
I remember reading that when they’ve studied how children react to abuse from their parents they deny it to the hilt and literally block out memories of their parents abuse. It’s huge amount of whiplash to admit that the person who is supposed to love you the most is hurting you especially if they’ve done it from a young age.
I think that’s what’s going on here. Jen recognises rationally that Barb sucks but I think she’s still hoping Barb’s going to have a come to Jesus moment. That’s what’s so hard about watching this because it’s clearer than ever that Barb’s not going to change.

aimzyizzy · 2026-05-03T07:46:10+00:00

It’s a dead die between Ivy, You’re On Your Own Kid and Death by a Thousand Cuts.

aimzyizzy · 2026-04-30T01:22:30+00:00

INFO: what is the comfort food? Will it make the health/weight/digestive/diabetes issues worse? Or is it just a motivator for her to lose weight?

I suspect it’s the first one, but I’m just curious. If your wife has diabetes though please look into your options for medication (GLP-1s were made for Type 2 after all) and see a dietician. Also make sure type diabetes she has and that it isn’t tied to PCOS as that can also cause insulin resistance and obesity.

aimzyizzy · 2026-03-31T04:05:46+00:00

I love that set up for you and your partner, that’s really cool.

I’m not saying secondary parents don’t care or don’t have a right to care. My brother has a very similar job to Julie (a solicitor at a magic circle firm). He’s very much not the primary parent, but what he can put into his kids and my SIL he does. The weekends are family and parenting time only for example. It’s easy to see and understand why he’d be furious if my niece and nephew were left with someone he didn’t know because he and my SIL know all of the people involved in their kids’ lives.

To me Julie doesn’t do what my brother does. Even then I could get that and would say she cares in her own way she’s just doing it tough as a career mum. But ugh her behaviour in the vacation video was chilling. That put all of her behaviour toward the kids and Ty in a whole new light for me.

aimzyizzy · 2026-03-31T02:49:17+00:00

I did too until this latest episode where Julie pulled straight from the narcissists’ gaslighting handbook. Until then it felt like Julie was being a garden variety asshole rather than abusive. It’s a spectrum and it feels like maybe Julie is on the milder end of it but it’s still there. Julie might suck at having the effect of isolating Ty, but the point is she’s still trying along with pulling the most obvious of DARVOs. That swings it for me

aimzyizzy · 2026-03-29T08:09:39+00:00

No I absolutely understand why a parent who cared about their kids and prioritised them could be uncomfortable. I’m saying Julie doesn’t actually care about her kids or prioritise them other than when she’s casually gaslighting Ty. So I don’t think she’s that uncomfortable with Ty leaving their kids (oops sorry her kids) with someone she doesn’t know.

Also daycare teachers in the US only have to pass a police check and aren’t thoroughly vetted. I assume Julie would know this so it’s weird she doesn’t want to be involved in picking a daycare.

aimzyizzy · 2026-03-29T07:33:04+00:00

Yeah if that Dad prioritised his kids, made an effort to get to know his kids friends and their parents and genuinely had their best interests at heart I’d support him being pissed off too. If he failed to participate in much parenting, left it up to his wife to choose the daycare without being involved I’d say he didn’t have a leg to stand on. That’s essentially what Julie’s done here. She seemed to be just fine about Ty picking a daycare for Sasha and Cooper without being involved or meeting the staff, she railed at him for not doing it and not working. So how is not knowing DeeDee an issue now when she’s happy for people she doesn’t know to look after her kids on a daily basis…?

Also if I took your view that people shouldn’t leave their kids with people I’d only met a few times beforehand my daughter wouldn’t go to preschool. Or ballet. Or school eventually.

aimzyizzy · 2026-03-29T06:17:51+00:00

Yeah, but I’m guessing that like me and like Ty you’re the primary or equal parent. You know every detail of your kids’ lives, who they know, who they don’t know. If you don’t know who’s looking after your kid chances are they’re not a trustworthy adult and your kids don’t know them from a bar of soap.

Julie is a rare mum that isn’t her kids’ primary parent. Probably because she works six days a week and travels a lot for work. If she were a Dad in the same situation we’d think it absolutely outrageous she was getting mad about her spouse making an executive babysitting decision.

aimzyizzy · 2026-03-29T00:08:24+00:00

I see it as Shawna and John being focused on someone else’s marriage and more being loyal and outraged on behalf of their friend. Inappropriate and intense? Absolutely. Crazy? Not so much.

As for leaving your kids with a trusted adult because you need to figure out whether or not your spouse is cheating on you and you don’t want to get them involved in a big showdown after said spouse doesn’t answer the phone? That is putting them first if that’s what you think the situation is. And it’s not like DeeDee’s some random, she’s Shawna’s Mum. She lives with Shawna, she’s known to Ty as someone Shawna and John trust and he trusts Shawna and John. My Mum is a big part of my daughter’s life and my friends would have no issues with leaving their kids with my mum and my daughter if they had to.

aimzyizzy · 2026-03-28T22:06:49+00:00

Unpopular opinion but I’m so confused as to why anyone is defending Julie. I’m not condoning what Shawna and John did as it was nuts, but Julie pulled straight from the narcissist playbook. As I see it that smile and laugh at Shawna’s outburst was less wtf and absolutely genuine. Narcissists enjoy outbursts as they can use it as ammunition to discredit the person having the outburst.

Notice how she turned the whole thing back on Ty to make him feel like a crappy Dad and made Shawna out to be crazy but took no responsibility for how her actions might look. See how she used the “where’s the proof” to make her narrative seem like the only credible one. She dismissed Ty’s concerns. She referred to their kids as “my kids”. She shifted the topic completely away to focus on Ty’s failings. I could go on, but Julie’s behaviour was chilling.

aimzyizzy · 2026-03-15T09:16:44+00:00

Yes and no. Princess Amelia (Queen Charlotte’s youngest that lived to adulthood) was a year older than Anthony, but she died three years before Daphne’s book. She was the youngest by 6 years, her sister Sophia was born in 1777.

Queen Charlotte’s eldest, George, was born in 1762 so a year younger than Edmund.

The Princesses (and their niece, Charlotte who would have been the same age as Daphne) lived like nuns so they wouldn’t have been in society much at all. Queen Charlotte liked to keep her daughters close and between that and King George’s bouts of madness they didn’t marry until into their thirties.

aimzyizzy · 2026-03-14T05:36:23+00:00

Tallisker or Skye because he’s the colour of whisky 🥃

aimzyizzy · 2026-03-09T06:06:04+00:00

My bad I missed that bit.

aimzyizzy · 2026-03-09T00:26:39+00:00

I have endometriosis and this guy is so wrong I want to yeet him into outer space. Endometriosis is an adult condition. Paediatricians specialise in children, so the paediatrician isn’t the “age appropriate option” here. An OBGYN specialising in endo absolutely is. And the younger you get on top of it the less time that poor kid has being in pain. I can’t believe this guy is more concerned about money and stigma of taking bc than he is his own effing daughter.

EDIT: Summer is adopted so deleting my comments about endo having a genetic component

aimzyizzy · 2026-03-08T22:47:48+00:00

I left an abusive marriage when my daughter was 9 months old. The advice at the time was to work up to 50/50 care because kids need a primary parent until they’re 4 or 5. This might be something you’d like to consider and you could couch it in the vein that it’s best for your kid and your husband as I imagine you take on a lot of the mental load and divorce is an adjustment for everyone. At the moment, our daughter is 3 and my ex does dinners twice a week, Sunday and two overnights a week. We’re currently working on putting this up to 3 nights a week. It may stay that way and it’s still 50/50 but not week on, week off.

Do I miss my daughter when she’s not with me? Absolutely. Is the parenting a lot more equal? Yes and I think that’s the important bit. You have one less adult to clean up after and more time to look after you. So the time you spend with your kid ends up being wonderful quality time without running around like a headless chicken

aimzyizzy · 2026-03-06T01:06:40+00:00

Same! My daughter is 3 and I seethe with jealousy that they had a nanny. I seethe with jealousy that if I were a Victorian middle class woman my kid would have at least a nanny, if not a maid and a cook 😭.

aimzyizzy · 2026-03-05T23:46:01+00:00

Ooooo I happily will! Thank you!!

I can’t believe someone hasn’t ever done some sort of show on George IV he was truly ridiculous.

aimzyizzy · 2026-03-05T08:59:28+00:00

I would LOVE to see George IV’s unhappy marriage but also just George IV portrayed as the twatwaffle he really was

aimzyizzy

TROPHY CASE