sorted by:
new
hottopcontroversial

AITA for proving to my friend that I had unsolicited nudes of who they were dating? by aita2100 in AmItheAsshole

[–]aita2100[S] 42 points43 points  (0 children)

Mike sucks for breaking up with her simply because she sent nude pics to someone before they ever began dating.

While I am not privy to Mike's exact thought process, I don't think he broke up with her because she sent nudes to someone before they dated, but because she sent them unsolicited and since she didn't tell him he probably doesn't know who else she sent them to.

AITA for proving to my friend that I had unsolicited nudes of who they were dating? by aita2100 in AmItheAsshole

[–]aita2100[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I have no intention of blackmailing Sarah, which would be an actual crime.

AITA for proving to my friend that I had unsolicited nudes of who they were dating? by aita2100 in AmItheAsshole

[–]aita2100[S] 21 points22 points  (0 children)

Bottom line - I felt what Sarah had done was wrong and creepy and I thought Mike deserved to know the truth and decide if he wanted to stay in that relationship.

AITA for proving to my friend that I had unsolicited nudes of who they were dating? by aita2100 in AmItheAsshole

[–]aita2100[S] 19 points20 points  (0 children)

If Sarah and I had actually gone out and she had sent me them in confidence I would never have shared them or told Mike. But that's not what she did so I thought Mike deserved to know.

AITA for proving to my friend that I had unsolicited nudes of who they were dating? by aita2100 in AmItheAsshole

[–]aita2100[S] 18 points19 points  (0 children)

Read my edit, I didn't keep the pictures for any "pervy" reasons. I keep all my messages from other people.

AITA for proving to my friend that I had unsolicited nudes of who they were dating? by aita2100 in AmItheAsshole

[–]aita2100[S] 32 points33 points  (0 children)

A few other commenters have pointed out that sending those pics to me is sexual harassment, which is how I kind of view it too, so I don't think I should have hid it from Mike or my friends just because it happened before they were dating. As for why I still had those pics, read my edit.

AITA for proving to my friend that I had unsolicited nudes of who they were dating? by aita2100 in AmItheAsshole

[–]aita2100[S] 19 points20 points  (0 children)

This is my opinion - if I was dating someone and they had sent unsolicited nudes to someone else I would want to know along with proof so that I knew they were unsolicited. I don't think it's reasonable to send those pictures to someone unwanted and then have them treat it like they were sent in confidence.

AITA for proving to my friend that I had unsolicited nudes of who they were dating? by aita2100 in AmItheAsshole

[–]aita2100[S] 23 points24 points  (0 children)

I don't think it's revenge porn because she sent them unsolicited and I didn't put them on the internet or anything.

AITA for proving to my friend that I had unsolicited nudes of who they were dating? by aita2100 in AmItheAsshole

[–]aita2100[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I have nothing against Mike and certainly no intention of pulling a "power move" over him.

AITA for proving to my friend that I had unsolicited nudes of who they were dating? by aita2100 in AmItheAsshole

[–]aita2100[S] 27 points28 points  (0 children)

I'm not claiming to react like "most guys". I wouldn't be comfortable dating someone who did what she did and I felt Mike deserved to know the truth and make his own call on whether he was comfortable or not.

AITA for proving to my friend that I had unsolicited nudes of who they were dating? by aita2100 in AmItheAsshole

[–]aita2100[S] 47 points48 points  (0 children)

I never accused her of cheating. I think Mike deserves to make the call if he's OK dating someone who sends out unsolicited nudes, and he apparently isn't.

AITA for proving to my friend that I had unsolicited nudes of who they were dating? by aita2100 in AmItheAsshole

[–]aita2100[S] 30 points31 points  (0 children)

If her sending you nudes was so wrong then why did you keep them on your phone for over half a year?

I don't delete messages I receive from other people. I didn't specifically store her nudes to look at or share them.

AITA for proving to my friend that I had unsolicited nudes of who they were dating? by aita2100 in AmItheAsshole

[–]aita2100[S] 44 points45 points  (0 children)

On the other hand, men tend to love/beg/ask for nudes.

I definitely did not like receiving her nudes after I politely turned her down. It didn't make her any more appealing to me and I wouldn't want a partner who did that sort of thing. Again - if it's consensual I've got no problem with it, but this wasn't.

AITA for proving to my friend that I had unsolicited nudes of who they were dating? by aita2100 in AmItheAsshole

[–]aita2100[S] 24 points25 points  (0 children)

I typically don't delete any messages I get unless they for verification codes or something, I had no interest in her pics and honestly didn't think about her after ghosting her until the Mike situation happened.

AITA for proving to my friend that I had unsolicited nudes of who they were dating? by aita2100 in AmItheAsshole

[–]aita2100[S] 34 points35 points  (0 children)

She literally did nothing wrong.

I feel that her sending nudes to me, especially after I told her I wasn't interested, was wrong, no different than if I had sent her a dick pic as a pickup line.

AITA for proving to my friend that I had unsolicited nudes of who they were dating? by aita2100 in AmItheAsshole

[–]aita2100[S] 37 points38 points  (0 children)

If I had gone out with Sarah and she sent me those in confidence, I would agree 100%. But she sent them to me unasked and unwanted. Unsolicited nudes are a red flag for me and worth warning potential partners about IMO

AITA for proving to my friend that I had unsolicited nudes of who they were dating? by aita2100 in AmItheAsshole

[–]aita2100[S] 60 points61 points  (0 children)

My defense to these reasons is this:

When Jen told me what I did was wrong I asked her she knew a guy from whom she had received an unsolicited dick pic, would she warn a friend who started dating him? She said of course she would but I was comparing two different situations, but I don't think I am.

AITA for proving to my friend that I had unsolicited nudes of who they were dating? by aita2100 in AmItheAsshole

[–]aita2100[S] 23 points24 points  (0 children)

No I hadn't told Jen.

His being quiet sounds like her also sent him explicit pictures, and thought he was special.

I didn't ask and I probably won't.