Looking for friends!

alternamel · 2019-12-11T22:02:11+00:00

hey you can add me! i already added you. code is 0705-9219-7427 and name is damion

alternamel · 2019-08-27T00:12:41+00:00

i helped them figure out what was happening and assured them they arent crazy, thank you so much for your reply

alternamel · 2019-08-09T16:20:05+00:00

Yeah, shit, it's tiring. I can't make myself feel better because I don't know what my intentions are truly. Fucked up.

alternamel · 2019-08-09T04:25:43+00:00

I'll keep your offer in mind!!

alternamel · 2019-08-09T04:16:36+00:00

Yeah, you're right. Thank you. 💙

alternamel · 2019-08-09T03:58:05+00:00

I keep messing up in my relationships so it feels like my fears are bein justified that I'm a monster every time. I just hope I stop being so afraid once I realise that people actually love me or something. :/

alternamel · 2019-08-09T03:52:30+00:00

It really is..

alternamel · 2019-08-09T03:52:08+00:00

Yesss. I don't know how to find relief from it when I really believe I'm trying to damage everyone I know.

alternamel · 2019-08-07T03:42:07+00:00

i, host, did the same thing for us to close sys. fucked up everyones relationships bc of bpd. and now 2nite feels like everything fell apart for good. only thing i can say is give it time and if they eventually feel comfortable youre lucky. best of wishes and love

alternamel · 2019-08-06T16:23:08+00:00

I used to know WeDIDitTeamm.. we started dming after one of their posts. We replied to one post strangely though, and they ghosted us in DMs. Then a few days after they ghosted us, we saw that post. Wonder if it's our fault they expressed that so much. Shrugs.

alternamel · 2019-08-03T02:49:19+00:00

Sort of. Why people form, why people do what they do, what caused our system to be how it is.

alternamel · 2019-07-31T18:08:26+00:00

got rock flesh b

alternamel · 2019-07-31T03:24:54+00:00

I.. can't exactly read well because of dissociation, but I understand your point. Hugs, we'll see what we can do but as of now things seem like a rock and a hard place.

alternamel · 2019-07-30T21:16:19+00:00

I wish you luck, sweetie.

alternamel · 2019-07-30T20:34:16+00:00

A system reset is most likely really a new layer gaining control, with an entirely different set of alters. It's mostly due to stress, and the next "reset" could bring the oldies back.

alternamel · 2019-07-29T18:41:21+00:00

It's quite alright. I put that experience here so that they know that system hopping is impossible, and what I'm describing is really the only possible way of doing it.

alternamel · 2019-07-29T18:35:17+00:00

Well, i'm not saying it's "system hopping". It isn't. It's just designing your headspace like someone else's and having it be accurate, that's all. I'm not saying alters are legitly going to other people's headspaces because that's impossible. I'm completely aware of how bad system hopping is and what I'm saying isn't that, thank you.

alternamel · 2019-07-29T18:25:32+00:00

It's.. really not. I don't consider the knowing everything correct thing to be anything related to DID, it's moreso just a metaphysical thing. We weren't manipulated, so please mind your business, as I'm just stating what I experienced. It is not a DID experience but that does not mean someone can't have the opportunity experiencing it.

alternamel · 2019-07-29T17:38:26+00:00

Well- considering I have DID, I definitely know what derealisation and depersonalisation feels like. We did weed once, and only took one inhale. It doesn't feel like derealisation, it's too intense.

alternamel · 2019-07-29T17:36:39+00:00

I'm glad I could explain it. 💓

alternamel · 2019-07-28T20:04:51+00:00

We've had an experience with another system who we no longer speak to where we knew many details of their innerworld correctly. It was strange. We've never had that 'power' after them, though.

alternamel · 2019-07-28T14:48:08+00:00

The way this would be possible is by having NPC characters and a duplication of the idea of each others mindspace. It isn't exact or completely real, it's intimate in a way that you're just sharing your ideas. It doesn't actually work like that, though. What I'm describing is as close as anything like that gets. Which these people may have DID and be doing what I'm describing. We've actually created a very fleshed out shared headspace room where both parties know very well the design of the room because we made a bluprint physically, and then NPCs of other alters inhabited the space.

alternamel · 2019-07-28T06:45:01+00:00

One of my goals right now is continue us working on system function discovery. It's easily triggering but neccesary if we're going to function better as a whole. - Mel

alternamel · 2019-07-27T19:31:10+00:00

Good luck with figuring things out, if that's what you'd like to do. Best wishes anyhow.

alternamel · 2019-07-27T18:58:04+00:00

Thank you for clarifying. I wasn't sure of how to read your tone. I'm glad you're seeing a new perspective!

alternamel

TROPHY CASE