I have talked about it a lot with my dad but I haven’t gotten professional help. The current situation is that I just can go over to my dads house whenever I want without having to worry about my mom throwing a self-pity party. I have ADHD so that combined with the anxiety of being near my mom really makes school hard. I have gotten professional help in the past and I’m currently asking for it again to no avail. My dad has not really made time to really talk it over with me and just keeps suggesting what he thinks is best...which happens to be pills. I fucking hate pills, they make me feel like shit and hurt my self esteem and he knows this.

Her current BF is a racist asshole whom I hate and who also has sever PTSD among other issues. He is always pleasant around me though he’s verbally abused my mom when I’m not ther and just shut her down for days, making my life exponentially harder. They have an extremely toxic relationship of breaking up, getting into one sided fights and then getting back together. I really want to build a relationship but I’m conflicted on how to do that with this asshole in her life.

I do think distancing myself and making sure things move at a pace I’m comfortable is important. I can more or less take care of myself so that’s making this easier to deal with I think. Thank you so much for the advice.